Fortunately there is a bridge. The antivax asks how safe is the bridge. The engineer answers "around 99.6 percent". The antivax says "ONLY !? NO WAY, I'M SWIMMING !!"
Okay, here’s a "Joke Poo" inspired by the engineer and anti-vaxxer joke:
Joke Poo: The Programmer and the Flat-Earther at the Edge of the World
A programmer and a Flat-Earther arrive at the edge of the (alleged) world. Below them stretches an endless abyss, presumably leading to… well, who knows what Flat-Earthers think is down there.
Fortunately, there’s a sturdy-looking wooden ramp leading down. The Flat-Earther, ever suspicious, asks, "How certain are you that this ramp will hold us?"
The programmer, adjusting his glasses, replies, "Well, I ran a simulation. Based on the wood’s density, load-bearing capacity, and the angle of descent, I’m about 99.999999999% sure it’ll work."
The Flat-Earther scoffs. "NINETY-NINE POINT NINE NINE NINE… PERCENT?! So you’re saying there’s a chance it’ll collapse? I’m walking around the edge! There’s gotta be a better way."
Alright, let’s break down this joke and then whip up some comedic enrichment.
Joke Dissection:
- Setup: An engineer and an anti-vaxxer need to cross a crocodile-infested river. There’s a bridge.
- Punchline: The engineer states the bridge is "99.6 percent" safe. The anti-vaxxer, terrified by the small chance of failure, chooses to swim (presumably to their doom).
- Humor: The humor relies on:
- Stereotype: The common perception of anti-vaxxers as being irrational and distrustful of scientific assessments of risk.
- Irony: The perceived safety of the bridge (99.6%) is seen as unacceptable by someone willing to risk swimming with crocodiles.
- Contrast: The contrast between the engineer’s measured, probabilistic risk assessment and the anti-vaxxer’s emotional, all-or-nothing response.
Key Elements:
- Engineer: Represents logic, precision, and trust in calculated risk.
- Anti-vaxxer: Represents distrust of science, heightened fear of small risks, and potentially irrational decision-making.
- Bridge: Represents a scientifically engineered solution with a quantifiable safety rating.
- River/Crocodiles: Represent a very real, significant, and unquantifiable risk.
- Probability/Percentage: The quantification of risk; key to the disconnect between the two characters.
Comedic Enrichment:
Let’s focus on the "probability" aspect and the engineer’s perspective, and add a sprinkle of historical bridge design fails for maximum comedic impact:
New Joke/Observation:
Why did the engineer refuse to drive across the Tacoma Narrows Bridge on its opening day?
Because even a 99.9999% chance of success wasn’t good enough when the other .0001% involved turning his Ford Pinto into a submarine doing its best impression of a salmon. He preferred the ferry, where the risk was only getting seasick from watching the bridge dance.
Humorous "Did You Know" Fact:
Did you know that some early suspension bridges used to suffer from something called "aeroelastic flutter"? Basically, the wind could get them jiggling so hard they’d tear themselves apart. The original Tacoma Narrows Bridge (nicknamed "Galloping Gertie") did just that in 1940. The good news? Today’s bridges are much better designed. The bad news? Now we’re just worrying about the existential threat of climate change making the river rise and then the bridge collapsing. It’s all relative, really.
Explanation:
- The joke leverages the historical failure of the Tacoma Narrows Bridge, a real engineering disaster, to heighten the humor. The Ford Pinto submarine adds a layer of dark humor.
- The "Did You Know" fact highlights the fallibility of engineering and provides a touch of historical context. It then takes it a step further by invoking another, more existential risk, adding a layer of contemporary anxiety to the mix.
This comedic enrichment uses factual information (the Tacoma Narrows Bridge collapse) and plays on the idea that even carefully engineered solutions can have unforeseen risks, which contrasts with the anti-vaxxer’s skewed perception of danger. It also connects it to a modern worry, climate change, for added relevance and a slightly dark, yet humorous, twist.