Skip to content
Joke Poo
Menu
  • Home
    • The Enduring Power of a Good Joke
  • Categories
    • Totally Feckin random
    • Why Did
    • Long
    • Wife
    • Walks into a bar
    • Dog
    • Bartender
    • Husband
    • Doctor
    • Chicken
  • Privacy Policy
Menu
Fake Poo

So I got my friend Matt, finishes his Philosophy Degree

Posted on July 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

Moves back home with his parents after, I ask "Hey Matt! Whatcha gonna do with that Philosophy Degree?"

Matt replies, "I don't know, I'm still thinking about it."

Joke Poo: The Plumber’s Dilemma

So, my buddy Barry just finished his Master Plumber certification. Moves back in with his parents afterwards. I ask, “Hey Barry! What are you gonna do with that Master Plumber certification?”

Barry replies, “I don’t know, I’m still trying to flush it out.”

Alright, let’s break down this joke and then inject some comedic steroids into it!

Joke Dissection:

  • Premise: A friend, Matt, obtains a Philosophy degree. This sets up an expectation of intellectual prowess and perhaps grand plans.
  • Punchline: Matt’s response, “I don’t know, I’m still thinking about it,” is ironic because a philosophy graduate should be adept at thinking. It highlights the potential impracticality or indecisiveness often associated (stereotypically) with the field of philosophy.
  • Humor Type: Situational irony, with a touch of self-deprecating humor aimed at the perception of philosophy degrees. It also plays on the trope of college graduates moving back home.

Key Elements:

  1. Philosophy Degree: The symbolic representation of deep thought and critical reasoning.
  2. Indecisiveness/Lack of Practical Application: The perceived contrast between the philosophical skills learned and their direct application to career or life choices.
  3. Moving Back Home: the universal experience of graduates struggling to establish themselves independently.

Comedic Enrichment Time!

Let’s use some philosophical trivia to spin a new joke:

New Joke:

I ran into Matt, the Philosophy graduate, at his parent’s place. He was contemplating which brand of oat milk to buy. I asked, “Matt, all that existentialism, and you’re paralyzed by oat milk?”

He sighed, “Yeah, I’m really struggling to reconcile the Categorical Imperative with the Utilitarian arguments for the different calcium fortification levels.”

Why this works:

  • Builds on the Original: It references Matt and his philosophy degree, keeping the established context.
  • Philosophical Name-Dropping: The inclusion of “Categorical Imperative” (Kant) and “Utilitarian arguments” (Mill) adds a layer of absurdity. It’s over-intellectualizing a mundane decision, further highlighting the disconnect between theoretical knowledge and real-world application.
  • Modern Twist: The oat milk choice is a relevant and relatable example of modern decision fatigue.
  • Satire: It playfully satirizes both the perceived overthinking of philosophy students and the sometimes-overwhelming choices of modern consumerism.

Bonus Witty Observation:

Did you know that historically, many philosophers were actually independently wealthy? Plato had family money, Nietzsche had a small inheritance. Maybe the real philosophy degree is the friends we make along the way AND the trust fund that allows us to ponder existence without worrying about rent. Makes Matt’s situation a lot less amusing!

Todays SH1T Jokes

  • ARTI the hitman
  • What did the ocean say to the beach?
  • Speedy the mascot for Alka-Seltzer ended his own life today by drowning himself in a bathtub
  • Wearing Crocs
  • A Maltese man goes to a nutritionist
  • Did you hear about the guy who ejaculated for four hours straight?
  • The one thing politicians & porn stars have in common?
  • I just bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands.
  • How is virginity just like a bubble?
  • A man gets called to the hospital where his wife has been laying in a coma for a few months…
  • A husband and wife were grocery shopping.
  • A dog goes to a Western Union office to send a telegram
  • What do you call someone who’s attracted to shorter people of both genders?
  • Teddy Bear Collection
  • So I got my friend Matt, finishes his Philosophy Degree
  • Why didn’t the cake make it on time to the party?
  • A long time ago, in a quaint little village, there was a yearly tradition.
  • I have 6 legs, 4 arms and a 3 heads. What am i?
  • Did you guys know Oedipus was from West Virginia?
  • At the moving company where I work, I’m the smartest and the fastest!
  • Lie detecting robot
  • My wife was complaining that the vac was making a terrible whining noise and wasn’t sucking,
  • NSFW: What’s the most sensitive part of your body when your rubbing one out?
  • On his birthday, an old guy is going around the nursing home, entertaining himself by saying, “Guess how old I am! Guess how old I am!”
  • A cannibal says to his friend, “I’ve been feeling so nauseous lately.”
  • What do you call a fly without wings?
  • Financial Planning
  • Got 1 Dollah ?
  • A vegan told me….
  • The chief walks by the detective who looks upset about his case and asks, “What’s wrong?”.
  • This joke I made [my first time, I’m not a funny guy]
  • I was asked to write three words that describe me, I wrote
  • I no longer joke about Germans
  • What’s the spiciest thing to say to a man during sex?
  • People who have othodontic appliances on their teeth disgust me.
  • My wife always zones out when I try to talk at length about ancient civilizations.
  • Once there was a regional darts champion, who found that his darts flew with even greater accuracy after he’d had a drink or two.
  • A man went to jail for a racist rant in an elevator.
  • What do you say when someone throws a jar of mayonnaise at you?
  • After having a few glasses of wine at lunch, two elderly women were driving home in a large car.
  • How do KFC get their corn on the cob so smooth?
  • How does princess Leia get off during sex?
  • One Sunday, while counting the offering, the Pastor of a small church noticed a pink envelope containing $1,000.
  • A man received the following text from his neighbor.
  • A dog owner is with his dog in a park
  • The good news about erectile dysfunction is that it can be cured by diet and exercise.
  • My boyfriend said he doesn’t feel anything sexually and asked me for help.
  • What do you call a buffalo with a big butt?
  • A traveling businessman in a bar was talking about his lack of a love life
  • The longest joke I’ve ever heard

Categories

  • "Walks into a bar"
  • Bartender
  • Blonde
  • Chicken
  • Dirty
  • Doctor
  • Dog
  • Heaven
  • Husband
  • Irishman
  • Knock Knock
  • Knock-Knock Joke
  • Lawyer
  • Lightbulb
  • Long
  • Mother-in-law
  • Politician
  • Priest
  • Religion
  • Totally Feckin random
  • Walks into a bar
  • What's the difference
  • Why Did
  • Wife
©2025 Joke Poo | Design: Newspaperly WordPress Theme