Skip to content
Joke Poo
Menu
  • Home
    • The Enduring Power of a Good Joke
  • Categories
    • Totally Feckin random
    • Why Did
    • Long
    • Wife
    • Walks into a bar
    • Dog
    • Bartender
    • Husband
    • Doctor
    • Chicken
  • Privacy Policy
Menu
Joke Poo

Linda was well over thirty, but still completely flat-chested.

Posted on July 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

Despite her low self-esteem, she had dared to go out to a pub on a Saturday night.

Suddenly, a handsome guy appeared next to her and asked: “Why do you look so sad?”

“Well,” Linda answered honestly, “it's because my chest looks like a newborn baby girl’s.”

“Then I think we should stick together tonight,” he said, “because my package looks like a newborn baby boy’s.”

Later that evening, they went home to his place.

She sat on the edge of the bed while he undressed. When his underwear came off, Linda just sat there, staring in disbelief.

“But… you told me you looked like a newborn baby boy down there?”

“I do,” he said. “Twenty-one inches and eight pounds, six ounces!”

Joke Poo: The Talent Scout

Brenda was well into her fifties, but still completely unknown in the acting world. Despite her lack of success, she dared to go out to a casting call for a major film on a Tuesday afternoon.

Suddenly, a famous director appeared next to her and asked: “Why do you look so dejected?”

“Well,” Brenda answered honestly, “it’s because my acting career is as barren as the Sahara Desert.”

“Then I think we should stick together today,” he said, “because my project is as ambitious as colonizing Mars.”

Later that week, he invited her to his studio for a private audition.

She stood nervously on the stage while he set up the camera. When the camera was rolling, Brenda just stood there, blinking in confusion.

“But… you told me your project was like colonizing Mars?”

“I did,” he said. “Unrealistic, expensive, and ultimately going nowhere!”

Alright, let’s analyze this joke.

Key Elements:

  • Premise: A woman with low self-esteem due to her small chest meets a man who claims to have a similarly “small” package.
  • Misdirection: The audience assumes the man’s “newborn baby boy” comment is referring to size.
  • Punchline: The man reveals his “newborn baby boy” is newborn in terms of weight and length, not size, creating an unexpected and humorous twist.
  • Humor Type: Wordplay, surprise, incongruity.

Factoid & Connection:

Did you know that the average length of a newborn baby boy is around 19.5 inches and the average weight is around 7.5 pounds? The man exaggerates slightly, adding to the absurdity.

New Humor Piece (Witty Observation):

“That joke reminds me of the dangers of metric system conversion gone wrong. You ask a guy how big he is, and he tells you he’s ‘a robust 9.5 kilograms and 53 centimeters.’ Suddenly ‘big’ feels very, very different.”

New Joke (Playing off the Original):

Linda, emboldened by her pub experience, decides to be upfront on her next date. “Listen,” she says, “before we go any further, I should mention I’m basically a Ken doll from the chest up.”

The guy smiles. “Perfect! I’m the deluxe Ken doll with the…realistic accessories. You know, the ones that require batteries… and a small instructional manual.”

Later, back at his place, Linda hesitantly pulls off his pants. She sees a normal, if slightly underwhelming, situation. “Wait a minute! I thought you said you had ‘realistic accessories’?”

He shrugs. “Yeah, well, the batteries weren’t included.”

Humor Enrichment:

The original joke relies on a simple bait-and-switch. To enrich it, we can lean into the specifics of baby statistics. The factoid adds a layer of believability and relatability to the exaggeration. The new jokes play on similar themes of deceptive language and unmet expectations, incorporating realistic details to heighten the humor.

Todays SH1T Jokes

  • Where’s mommy?
  • A little 10-year-old girl was walking home alone from school one day!
  • [NSFW] My granddad
  • My wife came home with four cases of beer, three boxes of wine, two bottles of whiskey and two loaves of bread.
  • Young woman gets tired of guys her age who couldn’t afford any nice restaurants.
  • I went to the doctor for my prostate exam.
  • Linda was well over thirty, but still completely flat-chested.
  • A man named pun walks into a room and ten people are found dead afterwards after he left
  • What is the fear of seeing all species of donkeys at once called?
  • How do New Zealanders find sheep in tall grass.
  • A 104-year-old man is being interviewed on the news.
  • How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish man?
  • Drinking buddies
  • A demon runs a factory in Hell, and has a bunch of underlings working for it.
  • A priest …
  • How did Alan Greenspan answer his wife when she asked him “do these jeans make me look fat?”
  • What the rudest elf that works for Santa?
  • Did you hear about the guy who was sexually aroused by envelopes?
  • I like my women, just like how I like my laptop
  • Why does spider-man have such snappy comebacks?
  • My over weight friend had a heart attack while he orgasmed….
  • Starting a new website for d*ck pics
  • I can’t believe how well I’m accepting my husband’s small manhood.
  • At a meeting, the corporate manager told a joke.
  • George staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Henry.
  • A Boeing 777 was lumbering along at just under 500 mph.
  • A woman doesn’t come home one night. The next day she tells her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend’s house. The husband calls his wife’s 10 best friends. None of them know anything about it.
  • God is speaking to Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden
  • One day while he was building a barn
  • What do you call a cat, that gets away with a crime?
  • So Schrödinger’s cat walks into a bar
  • God forgot something !
  • I’m writing a musical about an exchange student who becomes a nanny in Canada and garners a following when she blogs about it. It’s called…
  • A drunk walks up to a cop
  • What’s the difference between light an hard?
  • Why did the nose wear a condom?
  • Don’t try to understand women
  • Why did the banana go to the doctor?
  • A guy gets pulled over for speeding down a highway
  • I like my women like I like my coffee….
  • The Hokey Pokey Killer decided to stop being a serial killer and start being an upstanding member of society.
  • Why did the visually-impaired man fall into the well?
  • Two hunters charter a hydroplane to take them out into the wilderness.
  • Ms Universe final question: What are your thoughts on the male sex organ?
  • A woman grants her mother’s unusual dying wish.
  • A blonde driving a car became lost in a snowstorm.
  • my doctor told me i have a rare condition that causes my anus to produce sugar
  • A redneck tells his buddy, “I got my COVID test results today, it says 50. I don’t know what that means.”
  • I need tell my girlfriend she’s using way too much teeth when she goes down on me, but I don’t want to hurt her feelings.
  • What’s the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea?

Categories

  • "Walks into a bar"
  • Bartender
  • Blonde
  • Chicken
  • Dirty
  • Doctor
  • Dog
  • Heaven
  • Husband
  • Irishman
  • Knock Knock
  • Knock-Knock Joke
  • Lawyer
  • Lightbulb
  • Long
  • Mother-in-law
  • Politician
  • Priest
  • Religion
  • Totally Feckin random
  • Walks into a bar
  • What's the difference
  • Why Did
  • Wife
©2025 Joke Poo | Design: Newspaperly WordPress Theme