Whoever kicks the bucket first has to come back and let the other know if there’s sex in the afterlife.
Because let’s be honest – no one wants to be stuck in the clouds without a little action.
Well, Earl bites the dust first. A few nights later, Mabel hears a voice whisper…
“Mabel… Maaaabel… can you hear me?”
She gasps, “Earl?! Is that you?”
“Yes, it’s me. I came back like we promised.”
“Oh, thank goodness! So, tell me… what’s it like?! Is there sex after death?”
Earl replies,
“Well, I wake up early, have sex… eat breakfast… then it's off to the golf course. After 9 holes, more sex. Then I sunbathe, take a nap, more sex, then lunch—salads, Mabel, you’d be proud. Then more golf, more sex… dinner… and then it’s sex till I pass out. Next day? Same schedule!”
Mabel gasps, “Earl! That sounds like heaven!”
Earl goes,
“Uh… not exactly. I’m a rabbit in Arizona.”
Joke Poo: The Eternal IT Ticket
After 60 years of grueling help desk work, Brenda and Gary, two senior IT specialists, made a pact. Whoever finally retired first would have to come back and tell the other if there was still a relentless stream of IT tickets in the afterlife. Because, let’s be honest, no one wanted to be stuck in eternal peace if it meant users still couldn’t find the on/off switch.
Brenda, burnt out and riddled with ergonomic injuries, finally packs her bags first. A few weeks later, Gary hears a faint chime, like a notification pinging through the ether.
“Gary…Gaaaaary… can you hear me?”
He jumps, spilling his lukewarm coffee. “Brenda?! Is that you?”
“Yes, it’s me. I kept my promise.”
“Oh, thank goodness! So, tell me…what’s it like? Are there still IT tickets after death?”
Brenda replies, “Well, I wake up early, triage tickets…attend a stand up…then it’s off to a massive server farm. After a complex migration, more tickets. Then I debug PHP, take a nap in the cloud, more tickets, then lunch—organic salads, Gary, you’d be proud. Then more code reviews, more tickets…dinner…and then it’s tickets until I crash. Next day? Same workflow!”
Gary gasps, “Brenda! That sounds like hell!”
Brenda says,
“Uh…not exactly. I’m a chatbot for Microsoft.”
Okay, let’s break down this joke and then rabbit-hole (pun intended) into some related humor.
Joke Dissection:
- Core Premise: A long-married couple makes a pact about discovering the existence (or lack thereof) of sex in the afterlife.
- Setup: Earl dies first, and true to the agreement, returns to Mabel.
- Twist: The afterlife does involve a lot of sex, but with a huge catch – Earl is reincarnated as a rabbit.
- Humor Source: The incongruity between the idyllic, pleasure-filled description of the afterlife and the absurd reality of being a constantly mating rabbit in Arizona. The humor also lies in the subversion of expectations – the “heaven” isn’t the spiritual paradise expected, but a purely physical one, and only for a specific creature.
Key Elements:
- Old Age/Long Marriage: The assumption of waning sexuality, contrasted with the desire for it to continue.
- Afterlife Expectations: General ideas about heaven/hell, often involving rewards/punishments based on earthly behavior.
- Sexuality: The primal drive and its importance, even (or especially) in older age.
- Reincarnation/Animal Transformation: The unexpected twist element that shatters the conventional afterlife imagery.
- Arizona: The specific location adds a touch of realism and the image of the Arizona desert is in contrast to the supposed ‘Heaven.’
Comedic Enrichment:
Now, let’s build on this! Here are a few options:
Option 1: A “Did You Know?” Style Observation:
“Did you know that rabbits are so sexually active that a single pair can theoretically produce hundreds of offspring in a year? So, if you’re looking for a high-energy afterlife, consider reincarnation. Just… maybe specify which rabbit. Arizona is a big state.”
Option 2: A “Real-Life” News Headline (Satirical):
Headline: “Arizona Rabbit Population Booms, Spurs Concerns Over ‘Eternity-Based Overpopulation’.”
Subheadline: “Local ornithologist claims, ‘We’re seeing unprecedented levels of rabbit-related activities. It’s like they’re… fulfilling a promise or something.'””
Option 3: A Follow-Up Joke:
Mabel, after hearing about Earl’s new life, started attending all the local rabbit adoption events in Arizona. One day, she spots a particularly energetic buck. “Earl?” she whispers, hopefully. The rabbit stops, twitches its nose, and replies, “Lady, I get that a lot. Now, are you gonna adopt me or what? I’ve got a reputation to uphold.”
Option 4: A “Religious Paradox” Observation:
“The joke reveals a fundamental theological question: If the purpose of life is to learn and grow, is an afterlife focused solely on physical pleasure a reward or a punishment? Is constant copulation a divine blessing or a form of eternal enslavement to base instincts? I guess it boils down to: Would you rather be a wise old owl in Ohio, or a rabbit in Arizona?”
Option 5: a joke about a different animal:
After 60 years of marriage, Earl and Mabel made a deal.
Whoever kicks the bucket first has to come back and let the other know if there’s sex in the afterlife.
Well, Earl bites the dust first. A few nights later, Mabel hears a voice whisper…
“Mabel… Maaaabel… can you hear me?”
She gasps, “Earl?! Is that you?”
“Yes, it’s me. I came back like we promised.”
“Oh, thank goodness! So, tell me… what’s it like?! Is there sex after death?”
Earl replies,
“Well, I wake up early, have sex… eat garbage… then it's off to the park. After harassing some small dogs, more sex. Then I raid some picnic baskets, take a nap, more sex, then it's time to beg for scraps —you’d be proud of the disgusting things I’ll eat. Then more trash, more sex… dinner… and then it’s sex till I pass out. Next day? Same schedule!”
Mabel gasps, “Earl! That sounds like awful!”
Earl goes,
“Uh… yeah. I’m a rat in New York City.”
Explanation of Choices:
- The “Did You Know?” option enhances the original joke with a relevant, factual (and slightly disturbing) detail about rabbits.
- The satirical headline adds a layer of modern absurdity by imagining the real-world consequences of Earl’s reincarnation.
- The follow-up joke brings Mabel back into the story and builds on the established character dynamics.
- The “Religious Paradox” turns it into a thoughtful, philosophical point of discussion, highlighting the deeper implications.
- The rat in NYC joke swaps in an equally sex-crazed (if far more repulsive) animal.
The key to enhancing the original joke is to either amplify the absurdity, offer a surprising but relevant detail, or extend the humor through character development.