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A man was eager to skydive, so he signed up for one.

Posted on August 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

He jumped out of the plane but when he pulled the cord of the parachute, it didn’t open. He tried tugging on it but it refused to budge. He started to panic.

He tried the emergency shute but that too failed to open. He panicked more, not wanting his life to end like this.

While he was in terror, he saw another man soaring toward him, but this man wasn’t falling down – he was being propelled up into the air.

Thinking this man may have a solution to his parachute problem, he shouted at him “Hey you! Do you know anything about parachutes?”

The man moving upwards shook his head and yelled “Do you know anything about gas stoves?!”

Okay, here’s a joke riffing on the skydiving one, titled “Joke Poo,” focusing on a similar setup with a shared misunderstanding:

Joke Poo

A woman was determined to win the chili cook-off, so she spent weeks perfecting her secret recipe. The day of the competition arrived, and she nervously ladled a sample into a judge’s bowl.

The judge took a spoonful, chewed thoughtfully, and his face contorted in disgust. He grabbed a napkin and spit it out.

Mortified, the woman asked, “What’s wrong? What don’t you like about it?!”

The judge, still gagging, replied “It tastes like… like poo! It’s AWFUL!”

Devastated, the woman burst into tears. Just then, another contestant came running up, also looking distressed. He spotted the woman.

“Hey! You!,” he shouted. “Do you know anything about chili?”

The woman, wiping her eyes, sobbed, “Clearly not! Why?”

The contestant yelled back, “Do you know anything about port-a-potties?! The damn truck just emptied one into my garden”

Alright, let’s dive into this parachute panic and see what we can unpack.

Joke Dissection:

  • Core Concept: A man faces double parachute failure during a skydive and encounters another man with a seemingly unrelated problem moving upwards.
  • Setup: Builds tension with escalating parachute failures. The humor hinges on the sudden shift to an absurd situation.
  • Punchline: The “gas stove” question is the surprise element. It completely disregards the skydiver’s immediate life-threatening situation and introduces an unrelated (and potentially equally dangerous) scenario.
  • Humor Type: Absurdist, situational irony, possibly dark humor depending on the audience. The clash of life-or-death urgency with mundane domestic concern is what generates the laughter.
  • Underlying Assumptions: Assumes the audience understands the danger of skydiving and the function of parachutes, plus the potential dangers of gas stoves.

Key Elements:

  1. Skydiving: The high-risk activity provides the initial context and danger.
  2. Parachute Failure: The source of escalating panic and the core of the predicament.
  3. Unexpected Encounter: A person moving upwards, defying gravity in the context of a skydive, introduces the unexpected.
  4. Gas Stove: A mundane, domestic object that provides the comedic incongruity and the punchline.

Comedic Enrichment & Alternative Jokes:

Okay, let’s try to spin this into something new, armed with a few interesting facts:

Fact: Did you know the U.S. Parachute Association estimates about 3.5 million skydives occur in the US each year, and the fatality rate is around 0.00066%? So, statistically, our guy should have had a good jump!

Witty Observation/Alternative Punchline:

  • “Hey! You with the questionable buoyancy! Any idea why both my chutes are decorative?” The upward-moving man replied, “Nope, but can you confirm you turned off the pilot light? The carbon monoxide alarm is going nuts!”

New Joke Inspired by the Original:

A novice skydiver, terrified, jumped from the plane only to find his parachute tangled beyond recognition. He plummeted towards the earth, screaming. Suddenly, a woman in a business suit shot past him, ascending rapidly while frantically patting herself down.

“Excuse me!” he shrieked. “Any tips on surviving this freefall?!”

Without breaking her frantic pat-down, the woman yelled back, “This is not a good time! I thought I set the sprinkler system to ‘vacation mode’!”

Why this works:

  • It retains the absurdity of the original.
  • It replaces the “gas stove” with a relatable (though amplified) domestic worry.
  • The image of a businesswoman ascending while patting herself down is inherently comedic.
  • Sprinkler system malfunction seems like a reasonable explanation for going up.
  • It preserves the dark humor – both characters are facing potential disaster but are preoccupied with completely unrelated problems.
  • Bonus points for it being less gender-biased than the original.
  • Sprinkler systems can cause serious water damage.
  • Automatic sprinkler systems are designed for fire fighting.
  • Sprinkler systems can cause water damage.

In essence, we’ve analyzed the original joke, identified its key components, and then used related facts and observations to create new comedic material that plays off those elements. This leverages the core humor of the original while adding a fresh, slightly tweaked perspective.

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