Legend has it, she laughs at all your jokes and loves you right, if you're funny.
They all want their shot, but its an hour long dive. To pass the time, they start telling each other jokes. In fact, because everything on the sub is coin operated, they make a game out of it.
For each good, original joke told, the teller gets a penny. For each bad or unoriginal joke, they lose a penny. The person with the most pennies at the end gets to catch the first girlfriend fish with the penny-operated net!
One man goes first, and tells a joke about potheads being ridiculous, but everyone thinks it's unrealistic, and so he gets no pennies.
Another goes, telling a pun laden joke about llamas. The other redditors think the pun is lazy, and so he gets no pennies.
This goes on for some time but in the end, no one has any pennies and they're all getting nasty toward each other.
Then, the captain of the sub calls out over the intercom that the girlfriend fish has been spotted! He rushes into the back, telling everyone to man their stations to catch her. As they do, a school of girlfriend fish – beautiful and free – swims past.
But there they go, swimming on by. The captain, confused, cries out, "Why did no one launch the nets? They only cost a penny! Don't you all want girlfriends that think you're funny?"
And the first man, head low, says, "Of course we do captain, but no one on this sub has any cents of humor."
Joke Poo: The Compost King
A group of competitive gardeners gather for a "Compost Cook-Off", a weekend-long event dedicated to crafting the perfect soil amendment. Legend says the "Compost King" title is bestowed upon the gardener whose compost yields the most vibrant, disease-resistant tomatoes.
Each gardener meticulously mixes, layers, and tends to their compost piles, hoping to impress the judges. To relieve the tension (and speed up decomposition!), they decide to institute a game. For every innovative composting technique shared, the teller receives a dried leaf. For every tired, rehashed method (like just throwing in coffee grounds), they lose a leaf. The person with the most leaves by Sunday gets first pick of the coveted "Worm Whisperer" compost accelerator.
The first gardener boasts about his Bokashi composting method, but the judges deem it too trendy and complicated, awarding him no leaves.
The second gardener drones on about the glories of turning his pile daily, but everyone knows that’s basic compost 101, so he loses a leaf.
The competition continues, but by Sunday morning, everyone’s leaf count is zero. Accusations fly: “Your greens-to-browns ratio is all wrong!”, “You’re using too much eggshell!”.
Suddenly, the head judge bursts from his tent, announcing that the tomatoes are ready to be judged! Everyone rushes to their plots, but the tomatoes are withered, riddled with blight, and barely clinging to their vines.
The judge, bewildered, cries out, "Why didn’t anyone use the fertilizer? It was free, and guaranteed to make these tomatoes grow! Don’t you all want to be crowned Compost King?"
The first gardener, shamefaced, whispers, "We do, but clearly, none of us have any common scents."
Okay, let’s break down this joke and then spin it into something new.
Joke Dissection:
- Premise: A group of Redditors, known for their online presence and humor, embark on a submarine quest to find the mythical "girlfriend fish," a creature that appreciates their jokes.
- Humor 1: Stereotypes: The humor relies heavily on stereotypes of Redditors (socially awkward, joke-obsessed, seeking validation).
- Humor 2: Irony/Paradox: The situation is inherently ironic. These self-proclaimed humorists are failing at humor amongst themselves.
- Humor 3: Coin Operated Absurdity: The coin-operated everything (including the net) and the penny-based joke competition add a layer of absurdity.
- Punchline: The pun "cents of humor" is the final payoff, highlighting their humorless state despite seeking a partner who appreciates humor. It’s a literal interpretation of lacking "sense" in the realm of jokes.
- Social Commentary: There’s a subtle commentary on online validation and the disconnect between online persona and real-world interaction.
Key Elements to Play With:
- Redditors: Their specific brand of humor, inside jokes, and search for external validation.
- Submarine/Deep Sea: The absurdity of the quest itself, the unique environment, and potential for sea-related puns.
- "Girlfriend Fish": A fantastical concept that lends itself to further embellishment and satire of relationship ideals.
- Humor Competition: The subjective nature of humor and the inherent competition among comedians (or aspiring ones).
- Puns: Play on the pun already presented in the joke.
New Humor Creation:
Type: Amusing ‘Did You Know’ / Fictional Factoid
Title: Fun Facts About the Elusive Girlfriend Fish (Micromegas maritus)
Content:
"Did you know that Micromegas maritus, colloquially known as the Girlfriend Fish, aren’t actually attracted to good jokes, but rather, to a complex biochemical compound released by humans when they genuinely laugh at themselves? That’s right, folks, the legendary Girlfriend Fish actually detects self-deprecating humility.
This explains why the infamous 2023 Redditor Submarine Expedition failed so spectacularly. Scientists now believe the internal squabbling, desperate pun-slinging, and obsessive need for validation created a toxic environment that actually repelled the Girlfriend Fish. Turns out, the fish can’t abide r/iamverysmart and r/suicidebywords at the same time."
Explanation:
- Builds on the Existing Joke: This fictional "factoid" expands upon the original joke’s premise. It continues the element of the ‘girlfriend fish’ and the redditors.
- Subverts Expectations: It subverts the expectation that "good jokes" attract the fish, highlighting that it’s actually humility and self-awareness that are attractive.
- Emphasizes the Irony: It doubles down on the irony by implying that the Redditors’ self-importance was the very thing that prevented them from finding what they sought.
- Incorporates Relevant Internet Subcultures: I’ve added the references to popular Reddit subreddits to further the joke.
This new bit of humor stays true to the core elements and themes of the original joke while providing a novel spin. It focuses less on a traditional punchline and more on a witty, informative, and subtly critical observation presented in a factual tone.