…discovered one morning that his best rooster had flown into a tall tree beside his farm pond and wouldn’t come down, so he went to his neighbor, Wil, and asked for help. The men had never gotten along, but Wil finally agreed, so the two men went to the pond and began climbing the tree, Hu first. They meant to frighten the rooster out, you see, but the bird only kept flying higher, branch by branch.
Then, just as Hu and the rooster reached almost the very top of the tree, with Wil right behind, there was a loud crack, the branch under Hu’s feet broke away, and down he went into the pond, splashing water and mud everywhere.
Wil scrambled down as fast as he could and reached out to Hu from the bank, but Hu just lay there on his back, sinking deeper into the mud until only his nose stuck out of the water. Another farmer had seen what happened, and he came running and pulled Hu out of the pond.
"Why didn’t you take Wil’s hand?" he asked Hu. "You could have drowned."
"Why should I take his hand now?" Hu grumped. "I passed him just a moment ago in broad daylight, and he never spoke a word to me."
Okay, here’s a joke based on the original, titled “Joke Poo”:
Joke Poo: The Case of the Missing Jewels
An eccentric old jeweler, Mr. Higgins, discovered one morning that his most valuable gemstone, the “Eye of Orion,” had somehow found its way into the elaborate water feature in his front garden and wouldn’t resurface. He reluctantly approached his arch-rival, Mrs. Periwinkle, another jeweler known for her competitive streak, and asked for help. The two had been locked in a silent feud for decades, but Mrs. Periwinkle finally agreed, seeing a chance to one-up Higgins.
The two went to the water feature and began meticulously wading through it, Mr. Higgins leading the way, poking at the plants and carefully disturbing the water. The plan was to try and flush the gem into a net, but the Eye of Orion just kept sinking into the murk.
Then, just as Mr. Higgins reached the deepest part of the water feature, with Mrs. Periwinkle close behind, there was a loud “plop!” and Mr. Higgins stepped in something soft and yielding, lost his balance, and went down face-first into the murky water.
Mrs. Periwinkle quickly extended a gloved hand to help Mr. Higgins up, but he just lay there sputtering and groaning, covered in mud and… well, something else. A passing gardener, having witnessed the spectacle, rushed over and helped Mr. Higgins to his feet.
“Why didn’t you take Mrs. Periwinkle’s hand?” the gardener asked, concerned. “You almost drowned!”
Mr. Higgins straightened his tie, his face contorted with disgust and indignation. “Why should I take her hand now? I just stepped in something she’s been talking through for the last 30 years, and she didn’t mention a thing!”
Okay, let’s dissect this joke and then fertilize it with some comedic compost!
Joke Analysis:
- Core Concept: The humor stems from the irascible farmer Hu’s extreme stubbornness and inability to accept help, even when his life is at risk. His grudge outweighs his survival instinct.
- Setup: The setup establishes Hu’s personality, the initial conflict (rooster in the tree), and the unlikely cooperation with his neighbor Wil. The escalating climb builds tension.
- Punchline: The punchline is Hu’s explanation for not taking Wil’s hand, revealing his deep-seated resentment. It’s unexpected because a normal person would prioritize self-preservation.
- Key Elements:
- Irascibility/Stubbornness: Hu’s defining trait.
- Neighborly Animosity: The strained relationship between Hu and Wil.
- Absurdity: The ridiculousness of prioritizing a grudge over drowning.
- Rural Setting: Adds to the down-to-earth, old-fashioned feel of the stubbornness.
Comedic Enrichment:
Let’s focus on the absurdity and the rural setting with this “Did You Know?” style observation:
Did you know: Chickens, the descendants of dinosaurs, are surprisingly bad at basic physics, especially when it comes to height assessment. Which explains why Hu, despite nearly drowning over a rooster, probably knows more about the laws of attraction and gravity than the entire chicken community combined. I mean, Hu may have been sinking, but at least he wasn’t flying into a tree and causing an entire chain of increasingly stupid events. And speaking of old grudges, that rooster probably remembered that Hu once tried to make him into soup, so you can’t really blame him for staying up there. Let’s just hope Wil doesn’t own a soup pot.