She was in the kitchen and I was in the living room. I called through to her, to ask if she had a newspaper.
She told me to get with the times, hardly anybody has newspapers anymore, and I could use her iPad. So I did.
The spider crawling across the floor, never knew what hit it.
Joke Poo: The Toilet Paper
I was visiting my grandpa the other night…
He was in the living room, watching TV, and I was in the bathroom. I called out to him, asking if he had any toilet paper.
He told me to get with the times, hardly anybody uses just toilet paper anymore, and I could use his bidet. So I did.
The goldfish in the tank next to the toilet never knew what hit it.
Alright, let’s dissect this arachnid-infused humor!
Joke Deconstruction:
- Setup: The joke establishes a contemporary scenario: a couple, one in the living room, the other in the kitchen. The man asks for a newspaper.
- Modern Twist/Misdirection: The girlfriend suggests using an iPad instead of a newspaper, highlighting the shift towards digital media. This sets up a technological contrast.
- Punchline (Unexpected Use): The punchline is the subversion. Instead of reading news, the iPad is used as a makeshift weapon against a spider. The humor comes from the unexpected and violent application of a high-tech device to a mundane task.
Key Elements:
- Newspaper (Traditional Media): Represents old technology and habits.
- iPad (Modern Technology): Symbolizes digital media and technological advancement.
- Spider: A common household pest, representing a low-stakes problem.
- Violence/Exaggeration: The unexpected and somewhat comical use of the iPad as a weapon.
- Contrast: The juxtaposition of a delicate and expensive device with a brute-force action.
Comedic Enrichment & New Humorous Element:
Idea 1: Witty Observation
“You know, it’s ironic. We’ve replaced newspapers with iPads to save trees, but I bet more iPads are now being cracked hunting spiders than trees saved by not printing papers.”
Idea 2: ‘Did You Know’ Factoid leading to a New Joke
Fact: Did you know that the average American is only ever within 3 feet of a spider? Even right now!
New Joke:
I told my therapist I have a crippling fear of spiders. She said, “Let’s confront your fear. I want you to hold this iPad.”
I panicked, “Why? Are we watching a scary spider documentary?”
She smiled, “No. We’re going under the floorboards.”
Idea 3: Expanding the Original Joke with Tech Support
I was visiting my girlfriend the other night. She was in the kitchen, I was in the living room. I called through, asking if she had a newspaper.
She scoffed, “Get with the times! Use my iPad.”
So I did. The spider never knew what hit it.
Of course, now the screen is cracked, and she’s furious. Turns out, her tech support experience is limited to changing the font size, not exterminating arachnids. Now she’s making me buy the newspaper, so she has something to hit me with.
Explanation of the Enrichment:
- Witty Observation: This adds a layer of irony by suggesting the environmental benefits of going digital are offset by the collateral damage to the devices used to kill spiders.
- ‘Did You Know’ Joke: This leverages a slightly unsettling fact about spiders to create a humorous scenario with an unexpected twist. The therapy setting adds to the absurdity.
- Expanded Joke: This builds upon the original punchline by exploring the consequences of using the iPad as a weapon and adding a relatable element of technological frustration and relationship humor. It also brings the original set up of newspapers full circle.