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What to do with all these foreskins?

Posted on September 16, 2025 by Joke Poo

A Jewish mohel with over 50 years of practice had accumulated a huge collection of foreskins during his career. Upon retirement he decided he needed to do something with his collection so he brought them to a well know bespoke leather artisan. The artisan told the mohel to give him a month and he will craft something spectacular. At the end of the month the artisan called and said it was ready. The mohel showed up at the shop and the artisan handed him a wallet. The mohel in disappointment said with thousands of foreskins you could only make a wallet? The artisan said if you rub it a bit it turns into matching luggage.

Joke Poo: The Compost King

A botanist, obsessed with creating the perfect fertilizer, had been collecting elephant dung for years. He amassed a veritable mountain of it behind his lab. Finally, deciding he needed to put it to good use, he brought it all to a renowned master gardener. The gardener told the botanist to give him a month, and he’d create something extraordinary. At the end of the month, the gardener called, saying it was ready. The botanist showed up at the garden and the gardener handed him a single, perfect rose. The botanist, in utter disbelief, said, “With tons of elephant dung, you could only grow a single rose?” The gardener replied, “If you plant it right, it grows into a whole greenhouse of bullshit.”

Alright, let’s dissect this foreskin funny and then elevate it!

Joke Breakdown:

  • Core Concept: A mohel (practitioner of ritual circumcision) has a massive collection of foreskins and seeks to repurpose them.
  • Setup: The mohel’s long career and accumulation of the material. The introduction of a bespoke leather artisan raises expectations.
  • Punchline: The unexpectedly mundane (a wallet) followed by a preposterous claim about its magical properties (matching luggage).
  • Humor Elements:
    • Taboo Subject Matter: Foreskin is inherently a sensitive topic, creating immediate potential for discomfort and humor.
    • Juxtaposition: The contrast between the vast quantity of raw material and the humble wallet is comedic.
    • Absurdity: The wallet transforming into matching luggage through rubbing is completely ridiculous and therefore funny.
    • Double Entendre/Innuendo: The “rubbing it” element invites a phallic interpretation, adding another layer.

Factual/Interesting Tidbits to Enrich the Humor:

  • Foreskin Regeneration: Research into foreskin regeneration exists. If successful, it could revolutionize burn treatments and potentially put mohels out of business!
  • Leather Crafting: The process of tanning leather involves some pretty harsh chemicals. Imagine the ethical dilemma of using those chemicals on that particular material.
  • Mohel Specialization: Some mohels specialize in difficult cases, like premature infants. Think of the size variations in this particular leather supply chain.

New Humor Attempt:

Option 1: A “Did You Know?”

“Did you know that the average human foreskin contains enough collagen that, if properly processed and treated, could theoretically make up to three-quarters of a teaspoon of high-end lip filler? It’s a lucrative, if slightly awkward, market. Mohels… are you paying attention?”

Option 2: A New Joke (Playing on Regeneration):

“A young med student nervously approaches a world-renowned mohel at a medical conference. ‘Doctor,’ he says, ‘I’m researching foreskin regeneration. Do you… happen to have any samples?’ The mohel smiles knowingly. ‘Son,’ he replies, ‘I am the sample library.'”

Option 3: Witty Observation:

“The ‘rubbing it’ part of the original joke is key. Because, frankly, any use for a giant collection of foreskins that doesn’t involve repetitive motion is a missed opportunity.”

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