It was a parrotty error.
Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on your Long John Silver joke, titled appropriately:
Joke Poo: Dog Doo
One day, Pavlov’s dog started drooling uncontrollably whenever someone said “Conditional response, conditional response.”
It was a drooly error.
Alright, let’s break down this joke and then spin some new comedic gold from it.
Joke Dissection:
- Setup: Long John Silver’s parrot repeating “Pieces of nine, pieces of nine.” This immediately evokes the classic pirate trope from Treasure Island and pirate lore in general. “Pieces of eight” is the more common phrase associated with pirates, but that the parrot is saying “pieces of nine” suggests something is amiss.
- Punchline: “It was a parrotty error.” This is a pun, playing on “parrot” and “parity” (meaning equivalence or being correct), implying the parrot made a mistake. The humor lies in the unexpected and silly explanation for the incorrect phrase.
Key Elements:
- Pirates: Specifically, the archetypal “pirate” with a parrot.
- “Pieces of Eight”: The specific phrase and its association with pirate currency. The variation to “nine” is the trigger for the punchline.
- Parrots: Their imitative nature and tendency to repeat phrases.
- Puns: The core comedic mechanism, connecting the error to the parrot itself.
Comedic Enrichment & New Material:
Okay, let’s leverage these elements. Here are a few options:
Option 1: Witty Observation (Playing on Parrot Behavior):
“You know, the truly terrifying thing about Long John Silver’s parrot making that mistake isn’t the error itself, but the fact that it implies Long John was using pieces of nine for some shady deals. Parrots don’t just invent things, they repeat them. So, who’s counterfeiting the pirate currency, and why is Silver involved? I guess a parrot repeating ‘tax evasion’ would have been too on the nose.”
Why this works: It takes the silly premise and adds a layer of conspiratorial humor, implying a darker, more realistic context to the parrot’s utterance. It leverages the known parrot trait of repeating things.
Option 2: New Joke (Building on the “Error” Theme):
Why was the pirate so frustrated with his parrot during accounting?
Because it kept squawking, “Calculate the hypotenuse, calculate the hypotenuse!”
He kept saying, “I asked you for the parrot-nuse, not the hypotenuse!”
Why this works: Uses a similar pun structure by mixing a pirate reference “hypotenuse” into “parrot” and creates a new scenario where the parrot is mistaken about vocabulary.
Option 3: Amusing “Did You Know” Fact:
“Did you know that despite popular depiction, parrots rarely, if ever, actually assisted in the navigation or tactical planning of a pirate ship? Most likely, they were simply status symbols or exotic pets. A parrot squawking about ‘pieces of nine’ was probably more annoying to the crew than helpful. Imagine trying to decipher battle plans over the sound of birdseed commercial jingles. The truly effective parrots were the ones trained to bite rival captains.”
Why this works: It subverts expectations by presenting a (mostly) factual counterpoint to the romanticized pirate-parrot relationship, adding a touch of realism and ironic humor.
I think Option 1 is the most engaging, adding a layer of intrigue to the simple joke.