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When COVID hit and everything was switching to social distanced versions, my drug treatment clinic put urine screens on hold.

Posted on September 27, 2025 by Joke Poo

They opted not to switch to curbside pee-cup.

Okay, here’s a new joke based on your original, titled “Joke Poo”:

Joke Poo:

When the Great Toilet Paper Shortage of ’23 struck, my artisanal toilet paper company had to get creative.

They opted not to switch to drone-delivered squares.

Okay, let’s break down this joke and see what comedic gold we can mine:

Analysis of the Original Joke:

  • Setup: The joke establishes the COVID-19 pandemic context and the shift towards socially distanced alternatives. The setting is a drug treatment clinic.
  • Punchline: The punchline creates an absurd image: “curbside pee-cup.”
  • Humor: The humor derives from the incongruity of a mundane medical procedure (urine screen) being adapted to an unusual and inconvenient method (curbside pickup, usually associated with food or retail). It plays on the literal application of social distancing principles to a highly personal act. The understated and unexpected outcome heightens the humour, rather than a wild or obvious outcome.

Key Elements for Enrichment:

  1. Drug Treatment Clinics: The core setting.
  2. Urine Screens: The specific procedure.
  3. COVID-19 & Social Distancing: The context.
  4. Curbside Pickup: The absurd alternative.

Enrichment & New Humor Creation:

Here are a few approaches, combining factual/interesting tidbits with comedic twists:

Approach 1: The “Did You Know?” Angle (Combining Urine Screens & History)

  • Did you know: Urine analysis dates back to ancient Egypt? They’d observe the color, smell, and even whether ants were attracted to it to diagnose ailments.
  • New Witty Observation: Imagine ancient Egyptians trying to maintain six feet of social distance while observing a “sample”. They’d have needed a really, really long stick for stirring that urine. Or perhaps they’d have created curbside pickup with a chariot!

Approach 2: The Clinic’s Perspective (Playing on Bureaucracy)

  • Factual Tidbit: Drug treatment clinics often face complex regulations and funding requirements.
  • New Joke: The real reason my clinic didn’t do curbside pee-cup wasn’t the awkwardness. It was the insurance claim. They couldn’t find the billing code for “Exterior Bodily Fluid Collection – COVID Surcharge.” Medicare just wasn’t having it.

Approach 3: The Technology Angle (Social Distancing & Modern Urinalysis)

  • Factual Tidbit: Modern urinalysis can be highly automated, with machines analyzing samples.
  • New Joke: My treatment clinic got really serious about social distancing. They introduced a robot urinalysis machine. Now, I’m being judged by Skynet…and my kidneys.

Approach 4: Playing on The Drug Theme

  • New Joke My drug treatment clinic put urine screens on hold and started doing Zoom meetings. Now everyone is stoned and thinks they’re cured. They were not.

Approach 5: Exaggerating the Curbside Concept:

  • New Observation: They almost went with curbside pee-cup, but the logistics were a nightmare. Imagine the Yelp reviews: “Five stars for the friendly staff, but my urine sat on the curb for 20 minutes before they brought it in. Next time, I’ll order through DoorDash.”

The key to making these work is to maintain the absurdity and relatability of the original joke while layering in the new information or perspective. I hope this helps enrich your comedic experience!

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