The boatswain took offense and said it was the exceptional case and shouldn’t be noted.
"I sincerely regret it," said the captain, "but I must record all incidents, even exceptional ones."
A few days later, the boatswain wrote in the log: "Today the captain was sober."
Joke Poo: The Tech Lead
The Tech Lead wrote in the project documentation: “Today, Junior Dev used ‘goto’ statements.”
The Junior Dev took offense and said it was a necessary workaround for a tricky bug and shouldn’t be documented so prominently.
“I sincerely regret it,” said the Tech Lead, “but I must document all code decisions, even if they make me want to cry.”
A few days later, the Junior Dev wrote in the project documentation: “Today, the Tech Lead finished his coffee.”
Alright, let’s analyze this nautical narrative!
Joke Dissection:
- Premise: The joke revolves around the power dynamic between a captain and a boatswain, and the interpretation of “official” record-keeping. The captain is being technically truthful but arguably insensitive, while the boatswain retaliates with passive-aggressive accuracy.
- Key Elements:
- Authority: Captain vs. Boatswain (ranking and role)
- Record-Keeping (Ship’s Log): Its purpose, perceived permanence, and use as a tool.
- Drunkenness/Sobriety: Violation of expected standards and the contrast between the two states.
- Passive-Aggression: The boatswain’s subtle jab at the captain.
- Irony: The log is meant to record the unusual, but ends up creating a humorous power play.
Comedic Enrichment & New Joke:
Let’s focus on the concept of the ship’s log and the importance of official records at sea, combined with the absurdity of the joke’s premise.
Did you know? Before GPS, ship logs were crucial for navigation. Captains used “dead reckoning,” calculating position based on speed, direction, and time elapsed since the last known location. Every entry in the log contributed to the ship’s position. (Hence the need for sobriety for the navigator, at least).
New Joke (Playing on historical context and accuracy):
A frustrated modern-day captain consults his ship’s AI. “Computer, the boatswain insists on recording in the log every time I order decaf coffee. He claims it’s ‘an exceptional event worthy of note.’ Is he allowed to do that?”
The AI, after a nanosecond of processing, replies, “Technically, yes. Your historical dietary preferences are irrelevant. However, I recommend you initiate procedure 47B. It involves replacing his coffee with ‘artisanal seaweed broth’ and attributing his subsequent grumpiness to ‘unexplained shifts in atmospheric pressure.’ It will be logged, of course.”
Explanation of the new Joke:
- Modern Twist: Replacing old technology with AI.
- Continues the Power Dynamic: The captain is still annoyed, but now has a futuristic weapon (the AI) at his disposal.
- Exaggerates the Absurdity: The initial complaint is even more trivial (decaf coffee).
- Maintains the Passive-Aggressive Element: The AI is still slyly suggesting a retaliatory action and the explanation is purposefully vague.
- Plays on Misdirection: “Atmospheric Pressure” as a reason is completely random and irrelevant, mocking the earlier requirement for accurate logging.
- Relates back to Log Entry: The AI is aware that all will be logged to the ship’s record.
The humor stems from the contrast between official procedures and petty squabbles, amplified by the deadpan delivery of the AI.