Man says, "I want gasoline under $3.00 per gallon."
God, "that's beyond me, do you have a different request?"
Man, " I want women to find me irresistible."
God, "is $3.00 with a loyalty card or branded credit card okay?"
Joke Poo: The Galactic Gas Station
A stranded astronaut on Planet Xorgon stumbled upon a familiar-looking figure pumping gas. It was Zorp, the Omnipotent Overlord of the Galaxy. Zorp said, “Swear you’ll keep this on the down-low, and I’ll grant you one cosmic favor.”
The astronaut thought for a moment. “I want hyperdrive fuel to be universally free for everyone!”
Zorp sighed, “That’s… complicated. Try something else?”
The astronaut’s eyes lit up. “I want people to universally agree on the best Star Wars movie!”
Zorp paused, staring into the swirling nebula beyond. “…Is ‘solo’ Considered canon and worthy of high consideration in this decision or are we throwing away an idea like this?”
Okay, let’s break down this joke.
Key Elements:
- Setup: Man encounters God casually at the beach (California setting is important – conjures image of laid-back vibe and potentially high gas prices). God offers a miracle in exchange for secrecy.
- First Request (Gasoline): Highlight of current social and political issues. A seemingly simple request (lower gas prices) proves impossible even for a deity.
- Second Request (Irresistibility): The man wants to be attractive to women. This contrasts with the first request in being a more personal, almost stereotypically vain, desire.
- Punchline: God finds the gasoline request so difficult He’s ready to consider the irresistibility option, but only if the gas is within a certain range and loyalty cards are used. The punchline subverts the expectation that anything is possible for God; it implies that politics and the complexity of modern economics are even beyond divine intervention, while vanity might be easily fixed.
Analysis:
- The humor comes from the incongruity. We expect God to be all-powerful, yet He’s stumped by something so “mundane” as gas prices. This highlights the absurdity of the current economic/political climate.
- The “irresistibility” request serves as a contrasting point – a trivial desire versus a widespread economic need. The joke suggests that even God is more willing to meddle with personal desires than to tackle systemic issues.
Comedic Enrichment:
Here’s a “Did You Know” observation that plays off the original joke:
Did you know: According to the U.S. Energy Information Administration (EIA), gasoline prices are influenced by a complex web of factors including crude oil costs, refinery production and capacity, distribution and marketing, and taxes. So, technically, if God really wanted to lower gas prices, He’d have to micromanage the global oil market, manipulate refining yields, and maybe even lobby Congress. That’s probably why He offered the irresistible charm option – way less paperwork! Plus, statistically speaking, if enough women found you irresistible, they’d probably offer you their gas discounts. Problem solved!
New Joke Idea (Playing on the “California” element):
A California venture capitalist met God on the beach in Malibu. God offered him one wish. The VC, without hesitation, said, “I want to disrupt the afterlife!”
God, looking weary, replied, “Look, I’m just trying to keep the place running smoothly. I’ve got souls streaming in, paperwork backed up to the celestial ceiling, and now you want me to implement agile methodology in Heaven? Can’t you just ask for, like, slightly better traffic on the 405?”