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New Zealand would be so safe in case of a world war

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

It's not even on the map!

Okay, here’s the original joke:

New Zealand would be so safe in case of a world war because it’s not even on the map!

And here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" version, titled:

Joke Poo: Space Invaders

Earth would be so safe during a Space Invaders invasion… because it’s right there on the screen, and we keep losing.

Alright, let’s analyze this joke:

Original Joke Deconstruction:

  • Premise: The joke sets up an expectation of New Zealand being geographically safe during a world war.
  • Punchline: This expectation is subverted with a witty and slightly absurd explanation: New Zealand is "safe" because it’s often omitted from world maps.
  • Humor Type: Observational, ironic, and self-deprecating (from a Kiwi perspective). The humor derives from the unexpected reason for safety and the playful acknowledgment of a real-world phenomenon (New Zealand’s frequent map omission).
  • Key Elements: New Zealand, world war, map omission, geography.

Comedic Enrichment & New Jokes:

Okay, let’s leverage those key elements to create some new humor:

Option 1: "Did You Know?" Style Enhancement

"Did you know that New Zealand’s frequent absence from world maps has led to a tourism campaign called ‘#GetNZOnTheMap’? The Kiwis have even suggested adding a giant illuminated kiwi bird to the landscape, visible from space, just to ensure future cartographers don’t forget them. Apparently, the bird would also double as a surprisingly effective early-warning system for impending global conflicts. Because if you can see the giant kiwi, it means the aliens have arrived, and that’s a world war you definitely want to be prepared for!"

Why it works:

  • Builds on the original joke’s premise.
  • Uses a real-world example (#GetNZOnTheMap is a genuine online trend/campaign).
  • Adds a layer of absurdity with the giant kiwi bird and alien invasion angle.

Option 2: A New Joke Construction

"Why did New Zealand file a formal complaint with Google Maps?

Because after years of being left off, they finally got added… as a small, uninhabited island off the coast of Antarctica. Apparently, even Google Translate couldn’t distinguish ‘Hobbiton’ from ‘Hoth’."

Why it works:

  • Relates to the central theme of map inaccuracy.
  • Introduces a topical reference (Google Maps).
  • Uses contrasting popular cultural element and its geographic implication. Hobbiton to a frozen wasteland.
  • Emphasises a humorous sense of misrepresentation.

Option 3: Witty Observation

"Being left off the map has its advantages. No unwanted visitors, a built-in excuse for why your country is perpetually ‘under development’, and the perfect alibi should a world war ever break out: ‘Sorry, we were off-grid… literally.’"

Why it works:

  • Highlights potential benefits of geographical obscurity.
  • Maintains the self-deprecating humor.
  • Connects the map omission to plausible scenarios.

In Summary:

The core joke is funny because it takes a recognizable issue (New Zealand being left off maps) and turns it into a playful reason for supposed safety during a world war. The new humor builds on this by either expanding on the map omission element, or introducing new scenarios related to geography.

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