By the river, next to the farm, a cow sits smoking weed. A beaver swims up to it, steps onto the bank, and asks,
‘Hey, cow, what are you doing?’
‘I’m smoking weed, and it’s amazing.’
‘Give me some; I’ve never smoked before…’
The beaver inhaled the smoke and immediately exhaled it. The cow replies,
‘Dude, not like that! Look: you’re inhaling the smoke and holding it in your lungs for a long time. Besides, swim downstream for a bit, come back here, and then exhale. And I’m telling you, it’s going to be awesome.’
They did as planned. The beaver inhaled, swam underwater to the other side of the river, and after a few moments, felt happy. He came ashore, flopped down on the grass, and chilled. A hippo approached him and asked,
‘Hey, beaver, what are you doing?’
‘Ah, see, hippo, I’m super high…’
‘Give me some stuff; I want some too.’
‘Swim across to the other side to the cow—she will share with you.’
The hippo swam upstream, came ashore, and the cow popped her eyes open and screamed:
‘Beaver, for fuck’s sake, LET AIR OUT!’
Joke Poo: The Lunar Lander
On the desolate surface of the moon, next to a research rover, an astronaut is casually vaping. A tiny Martian rover trundles up to him, clicks its metallic claws, and asks,
“Hey, astronaut, what are you doing?”
“I’m vaping space-grade juice, and it’s out of this world.”
“Give me some; I’ve never vaped before…”
The Martian rover takes a massive hit of the vapor and immediately lets it out in a puff of synthetic steam. The astronaut replies,
“Dude, not like that! Look: you inhale the vapor and hold it in your circuits for a long processing cycle. Besides, drive over to that far crater, scan for helium-3, come back here, then exhale. I’m telling you, it’ll warp your core programming.”
They did as planned. The Martian rover inhaled, drove to the crater scanning away, and after a few moments, felt… existential. It trundled back, parked clumsily, and chilled. A giant, clumsy lunar lander touched down nearby, its hatch opening with a pneumatic hiss. A second astronaut emerged and lumbered towards the rover, asking,
“Hey, little rover, what are you doing?”
“Ah, see, big astronaut, I’m totally space-stoned…”
“Give me some of that stuff; I want in!”
“Drive across to that first astronaut – he’ll share with you.”
The astronaut trudged over, and the first astronaut’s helmet mic crackled to life as he screamed:
“Rover, for god’s sake, CHECK YOUR AIRLOCK SEALS!”
Alright, let’s break down this riverside rendezvous of recreational relaxation and then concoct a comedic cousin:
Joke Deconstruction:
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Elements:
- Characters: Cow, Beaver, Hippo
- Setting: Riverside, near a farm
- Premise: Cow introduces Beaver to weed, Beaver recommends it to Hippo.
- Punchline: Cow yells at the Hippo, implying the Beaver’s instructions led the Hippo to hold its breath underwater so long it became an immediate danger upon surfacing.
- Humor Type: Situational, Irony, Unexpected twist (the hippo is a submarine), Animal humor.
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Key Conflict/Irony: The punchline is humorous because the audience expects the hippo to be in a relaxed, high state when it encounters the cow, as the beaver did. Instead, the hippo is holding so much air that the cow is terrified it will explode.
Comedic Enrichment Time:
Given that a key element is the Beaver giving instructions, let’s create a “Did You Know?” factoid that sets up a punchline related to a Beaver’s engineering prowess:
Did you know: Beavers are remarkable engineers. They build dams that can drastically alter entire ecosystems, creating ponds and wetlands. This ingenuity is so ingrained that even stoned beavers still follow their instincts…
New Joke:
A group of park rangers were baffled. A dam had appeared overnight, blocking a crucial waterway. The construction was impeccable, incredibly efficient.
“It’s like some sort of engineering savant built this,” one ranger said, scratching his head.
Another ranger pointed to a nearby beaver, who was staring blankly at the sky, holding a half-eaten log. “I think I know who our savant is…”
Suddenly, the beaver snapped out of his daze. “Wait a minute… this log isn’t structurally sound! We need to replace it with a load-bearing branch immediately… dude.”
Explanation: The humor comes from the juxtaposition of the beaver’s stoned demeanor with his innate engineering skills. The ending subverts the initial expectation. Instead of a stoner beaver just relaxing, it remembers its structural integrity imperatives despite being high. This links back to the original joke structure, where animal behavior gets hilariously altered (or reinforced) by drug use.