I answered and he said “What’s got a little dick and hangs down?” I replied, “Hm, not sure?” He says “a bat…… but what’s got a big dick and hangs up?” Then proceeded to hang up on me.
Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version of the original, titled appropriately:
Joke Poo: The Cloud Architect
So my mentor called me the other day…
I answered and he said, “What’s small, scalable, and lives in the cloud?” I replied, “Hm, not sure… is it a microservice?” He says, “Exactly! But what’s huge, monolithic, and leaving the cloud?” Then proceeded to disconnect the call.
Okay, let’s dissect this joke and then elevate it with some comedic enrichment.
Joke Breakdown:
- Setup: “My buddy called me the other day…” – Standard setup, establishes a conversational, relatable scenario.
- Punchline 1 (Misdirection): “What’s got a little dick and hangs down?” “A bat.” – This sets up an expectation of a riddle or a legitimate guessing game, albeit with vulgar subject matter. The answer is quick and relatively straightforward.
- Punchline 2 (Subversion and Anti-Climax): “But what’s got a big dick and hangs up?” (Followed by hanging up the phone). – This is where the humor lies. The listener expects another animal, object, or perhaps even a person related to the prior answer. Instead, it’s a play on the phrase “hangs up” (the phone), leading to a sudden, abrupt ending. The lack of a “real” answer is the joke. It’s frustrating and absurd.
- Key elements:
- Vulgarity: A foundational element. The initial question relies on crude humor.
- Misdirection: The first question sets a specific tone and expectation that the second question instantly flips on its head.
- Anti-Climax: The build-up to a punchline is deliberately sabotaged. The absence of a resolution is what makes it funny (or annoying, depending on the audience).
- Wordplay/Double Entendre: “Hangs up” can mean physically hangs, or to end a phone call.
Comedic Enrichment:
Let’s focus on the “bat” aspect and play off the absurdity of the original joke.
New Joke/Observation:
“My friend pulled the old ‘What’s got a little dick and hangs down? A bat!’ joke on me. So I countered with: ‘Okay, what’s got a really big dick and still hangs down?’
He was stumped, so I told him: ‘A bat… after getting a serious boner. They don’t have blood flow down there, so it will remain forever limp'”
Humorous Facts/Did You Know (inspired by the joke):
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Did you know: Bat penises are unusually small relative to their body size, especially considering how impressive their echolocation skills are. It’s like evolution said, “Okay, you get super-hearing, but something’s gotta give. Think of it as a biological equalizer.”
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Did you know: Some species of bats mate while hanging upside down and flying, which is basically the aerial equivalent of trying to assemble IKEA furniture during an earthquake. The coordination involved is astonishing… and also a little awkward to imagine.
Why This Works:
The enriched material maintains the original joke’s spirit:
- Vulgarity: Maintained throughout.
- Absurdity: The “boner that doesn’t work” adds another layer of silliness.
- Playing with expectations: The follow-up to the first joke follows the original structure and intent.
- Fact-based humor: The “Did you know” facts provide a factual basis to latch on to, yet remain absurd, and slightly crude.
The aim is to elevate the original joke from a simple “gotcha” moment into something slightly more clever and memorable by layering in information and expanding on the core concepts.

