Skip to content
Joke Poo
Menu
  • Home
    • The Enduring Power of a Good Joke
  • Categories
    • Totally Feckin random
    • Why Did
    • Long
    • Wife
    • Walks into a bar
    • Dog
    • Bartender
    • Husband
    • Doctor
    • Chicken
  • Privacy Policy
Menu
Joke Poo

A sexually active woman tells her plastic surgeon that she wanted her vaginal lips reduced in size because they were too loose and floppy.

Posted on June 9, 2025 by Joke Poo

Out of embarrassment she insisted that the surgery be kept a secret and the surgeon agreed.
Awakening from the anesthesia after the surgery she found three roses carefully placed beside her on the bed.
Outraged, she immediately calls in the doctor.
"I thought I asked you not to tell anyone about my operation!"
The surgeon told her he had carried out her wish for confidentiality and that the first rose was from him. "I felt sad because you went through this all by yourself."
"The second rose is from my nurse. She assisted me in the surgery and empathized because she had had the same procedure done some time ago."
"And what about the third rose?" she asked.
"That's from a man upstairs in the burn unit. He wanted to thank you for his new ears."

Joke Poo: The Recycling Project

An environmentally conscious CEO tells her bioengineer she wants their company to be truly zero-waste and have them develop a process to recycle… everything. She specifically wants to address the sludge from their office composting program.

Out of a desire to innovate, the bioengineer insisted that the project be kept top secret and the CEO agreed.

Weeks later, the CEO, eager for progress, finds three meticulously crafted items on her desk. The first is a beautiful fountain pen, the second is a sturdy-looking walking stick, and the third is a delicate porcelain teacup.

Intrigued, she immediately calls in the bioengineer.

"I thought I asked you to keep this project confidential! How did these get here?"

The bioengineer assured her he had honored her wish for secrecy and that the first item was from him. "I felt compelled to create something useful from all that… material."

"The second item is from our groundskeeper. He was amazed at the durability of the final product and requested a walking stick for his garden."

"And what about the teacup?" she asked.

"That’s from the marketing intern. He wanted to thank you for his promotion. He’s now the head of our brand new… re-branding department."

Alright, let’s dissect this joke and then concoct some humorous embellishments!

Joke Deconstruction:

  • Core Elements: The core of the joke revolves around:

    • Vaginoplasty/Labia Reduction: A real surgical procedure with potential embarrassment or sensitivity attached.
    • Secrecy: The patient’s strong desire to keep the procedure private.
    • Misinterpretation/Irony: The roses as a sign of someone having told, but with a completely unexpected and darkly humorous explanation.
    • Burn Unit/Skin Graft: A sudden and shocking shift in perspective linking the surgery to a gruesome scenario.
  • Humor Mechanism: The humor arises from:
    • The Shock Factor: The unexpected and absurd twist involving the burn victim and ears. It takes a sensitive, intimate concern and turns it into something completely outlandish.
    • Subversion of Expectations: We anticipate the secret being broken, but not this way. We expect gossip, not organ donation.
    • Dark Humor: The joke treads a line between uncomfortable and funny by using a delicate subject (genital surgery) and tying it to a morbid one (burns).

Humorous Enrichment/Offshoot Ideas:

Here are a few ways we can build on this:

  1. "Did You Know?" (Playing on the real procedure):

    "Did you know labiaplasty, or vaginal lip reduction, has actually been performed since the 19th century? Back then, though, it was less about aesthetics and more about… well, let’s just say Victorian bathing suits left very little to the imagination. Surgeons were basically seamstresses with scalpels!"

  2. New Joke Setup (Twisting the "Secrecy" Angle):

    A woman undergoes a rather "involved" tummy tuck. She begs the surgeon for absolute discretion. Weeks later, she’s at a party, and a random guy walks up, slaps her stomach, and says, "Hey! I recognize that skin! Used to be my pool cover!"

  3. Witty Observation (Commenting on the Burn Unit Aspect):

    "You know, the moral of that joke is clear: Always recycle. You never know whose ears might benefit from your… ahem… ‘downsizing’."

  4. Exaggerated Hypothetical:

    The surgeon, horrified by the misunderstanding with the burn victim, decided to implement a new post-op rose protocol: "One rose if the procedure went smoothly and the patient is satisfied. Two roses if the patient leaves a five-star review. Three roses and a signed NDA if any body parts end up in unexpected locations."

  5. Meta-Commentary on the Original Joke (Acknowledging the Darkness):

    "That labiaplasty/burn victim joke is proof that sometimes the best medicine is laughter… even if it’s a laughter that makes you question your own moral compass."

The key is to either highlight a specific element of the original joke (like the secrecy, the procedure itself, or the burn victim angle) and exaggerate it, juxtapose it with an unexpected fact, or twist it into a new, hopefully amusing, direction.

Todays SH1T Jokes

  • At a poetry competition, there were two finalists!
  • The Riverside High
  • Two nuns, Bridget and Theresa, were on their bikes heading back to the convent in Dublin one night.
  • Strange but true: When you see ducks flying south in a ‘V’ formation, why is one line always longer than the other?
  • What do you get if you cross a dyslexic with an agnostic who has insomnia?
  • The professor of medicine is teaching the students about dissection
  • Am I the first person you have ever slept with?
  • Describe your love life in two words.
  • Cop understood the assignment.
  • Doctor, help me. I’m addicted to buying yachts. Is there something you can give me for it?
  • Teacher and her 3 boy students:
  • The woman I’m sleeping with keeps telling me I don’t need to be intimidated by the size of her ex’s dick
  • As we drove past some black and white cows my dad said “wow, it must be really cold out there…
  • Last year I bought my wife an artificial leg for Christmas…
  • I’m starting a research project into bestiality
  • I’m over 40 years old and I’ve never used essential oils…
  • I don’t know why everyone thinks of mobsters as bad guys.
  • Found out last night that I’m both gay and dyslexic.
  • I once dated a girl who was actually a ghost.
  • Satan arrived to welcome a new damned soul to hell. “Congratulations!” he said. “You wasted your entire pitiful life!”
  • A boy found a magic lamp one day and out came a genie who exclaimed “I shall grant a single wish that you desire!”
  • Why does Dracula always bite his victims in the neck?
  • A duck wandered onto my property
  • Not to brag, but I finished a puzzle under a week and…
  • Old lady at nursing home
  • Overheard an angry man with a lisp say “bithnith”.
  • I heard someone combined a bee with a pineapple.
  • I needed to buy toilet paper at the store and someone told me why are you buying so much toilet paper? I responded
  • I have an entry level job with thousands of people below me
  • Who puts the “P” in R-E-S-P-E-C-T?
  • The rescue team found a clue about a crashed airplane
  • “Why do you think you’d be a good waiter?”
  • I just took a great hiking class
  • Serious question
  • The Scottish definition of a gentleman…
  • I replaced my wife’s lip balm with a glue stick
  • A guy decides to go to confession for the first time in many years. He enters the confessional, and there’s a shelf with cigars, brandy, and chocolate.
  • In WW2 a General had an idea on how to cheer the troops up
  • A man goes in for a checkup and afterwards the doctor comes in and somberly tells him that his kidneys are failing.
  • World used to be better, we could have 1 steak every week, only with minimum wage
  • What works faster than a calculator?
  • A man dies and goes to hell
  • I went to see my doctor, he asked me to provide a stool sample.
  • I just tripped over a box of Kleenex. Ow!
  • Sheryl Crow and Russell Crowe walk into a bar.
  • A man was out on the golf course one sunny day when he realized he was completely lost.
  • In England, when you turn 100, you get a royal letter from the King or Queen.
  • A man dies and ends up in hell.
  • What do you get when you goose a ghost?
  • Cemetery cold night

Categories

  • "Walks into a bar"
  • Bartender
  • Blonde
  • Chicken
  • Dirty
  • Doctor
  • Dog
  • Heaven
  • Husband
  • Irishman
  • Knock Knock
  • Knock-Knock Joke
  • Lawyer
  • Lightbulb
  • Long
  • Mother-in-law
  • Politician
  • Priest
  • Religion
  • Totally Feckin random
  • Walks into a bar
  • What's the difference
  • Why Did
  • Wife
©2025 Joke Poo | Design: Newspaperly WordPress Theme