A non-sequitur is taking a flight from Phoenix to Atlanta with a stopover in Dallas. He’s going for business, to ensure quality of the inventory in the Atlanta warehouse. On the day of his flight, he gets to the airport and sails through security with enough time to eat breakfast at the gate before boarding.
The flight itself is fairly uneventful, save for some standard turbulence, and he deplanes in Dallas without incident. He enters the terminal and takes a look at the flight board to find the details about his flight to Atlanta. But, upon scanning the list, he cannot find the flight! He figures he just didn’t read the list correctly and spends a bit more time reading every line to find his flight to Atlanta. But after the second and even third run-through, he still cannot find his flight!
Panic is starting to set in. He hurries to the nearest counter, where he waits nervously behind a customer complaining about a delay. Finally, it’s his turn.
“How can I help you?” the agent asks him.
“I got here from Phoenix and I’m looking for my flight to Atlanta, but I can’t find it on the board. Can you help me? I need to know what gate I’m flying out of!”
After giving the agent his confirmation code, the agent clickety-clacks on the keyboard. After a few minutes, the agent gets a strange look on her face. She clicks and clacks a bit more. Her brow furrows, and her face screws up.
The non-sequitur asks, “Is something wrong?”
The agent responds, “I’m sorry, it appears there’s no connection.”
Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version of the non-sequitur joke, aiming for a similar structure and punchline surprise:
Joke Poo: The Existential Plumber
An existential crisis walks into a plumbing supply store. He’s there to fix a leaky faucet in his apartment; the incessant dripping is mocking the fragile nature of existence. He’s already spent hours contemplating the absurdity of compression fittings versus push-fit connectors, a metaphor, he thinks, for free will versus determinism.
He wanders the aisles, overwhelmed by the sheer volume of brass, PVC, and rubber. He examines a P-trap, wondering if its purpose isn’t just to prevent sewer gas from backing up, but also to trap all meaning in a circular, inescapable loop.
Finally, he approaches a bored-looking store clerk, who is busy scrolling through his phone.
“Excuse me,” the existential crisis says, his voice heavy with the weight of philosophical despair, “I’m looking for a solution to a persistent problem. My faucet is constantly dripping, a relentless reminder of time’s cruel march and the eventual decay of all things.”
The clerk, without looking up from his phone, grunts, “Aight, what’s it doin’?”
The existential crisis launches into a lengthy description of the faucet’s behavior, complete with references to Sartre and Camus, emphasizing the dripping as a symbol of man’s alienation from the universe. The clerk only seems to get more annoyed.
After a while, the clerk says, “I ain’t got time for that. Just give it to me straight.”
The existential crisis asks “Okay, is there any possible repair?”
The clerk sighs and says, “I’m sorry, it appears there’s no point.”
Okay, let’s break down this joke:
Core Elements:
- The Setup: We’re told the protagonist is a “non-sequitur.” This immediately primes the audience to expect something illogical or irrelevant.
- The Travel Narrative: The lengthy description of the journey from Phoenix to Dallas, with details about breakfast, turbulence, and searching the flight board, builds anticipation. The ordinariness emphasizes the absurdity of the payoff.
- The Punchline: “I’m sorry, it appears there’s no connection.” This is a double entendre. It refers both to the literal missed flight connection and the inherent nature of a non-sequitur to lack logical connection.
Analysis:
The humor derives from the contrast between the meticulously detailed setup of a normal travel scenario and the payoff based on the non-sequitur’s identity. The joke’s effectiveness hinges on understanding the term “non-sequitur” and recognizing the double meaning in the agent’s response.
Comedic Enrichment: New Joke & Amusing Observation
New Joke:
A tautology walks into a bar, sees the bartender, and says, “Well, that’s him!” The bartender says, “I’m sorry, that is who that is.”
Amusing Observation:
Did you know that Phoenix, Atlanta, and Dallas airports (PHX, ATL, and DFW) are among the busiest in the world? It’s like the punchline of this joke is actively trying to avoid logic by passing through these highly trafficked points. It is like the non sequitur is trying to generate as many random events as possible to guarantee that no connection exists.