Jesus then stands defiantly in front of the crowd and says “STOP. Let the one amongst you who has no sin cast the first stone.”
The crowd falls still.
Suddenly a rock flies from the back of the crowd, hits the woman on the head and she falls down dead. Jesus turns and yells “God DAMMIT, mom! That’s not funny!”
Joke Poo: The Programming Convention
A frazzled programmer stands nervously before a panel of senior engineers, having just deployed a disastrous update that crashed the entire production database.
One of the senior engineers stands up and booms, "Right! Let he who is without bugs in their code cast the first stone… to blame!"
The room is silent for a long moment.
Then, a single line of code gets committed to the main branch. It’s just one line.
The frazzled programmer is immediately fired. The Senior engineer says, "Linters and Code reviews exist for a reason, Dave. Did you not even use one? That’s why you are to blame."
Alright, let’s dissect this dark humor gem.
Joke Dissection:
- Setup: Classic biblical scenario – the adulteress, the mob, Jesus’ famous interjection. Establishes a serious, high-stakes context.
- Twist: The breaking of the tension with an unexpected act of violence, contravening the moral lesson.
- Humor Source:
- Unexpected Violation of Expectations: We anticipate mercy and moral superiority. We get a fatal headshot.
- Irony: Jesus, the embodiment of forgiveness, being exasperated by his own mother’s act of judgement and violence.
- Blasphemy: Lightly mocking sacred figures, which in turn makes it funny.
- Key Elements:
- Adultery
- Stoning (as punishment)
- Jesus/Religious Authority
- Forgiveness/Moral Superiority vs. Hypocrisy
- Mother of Jesus
Comedic Enrichment & New Humor:
Let’s riff on the "Mother of Jesus" angle, and her possible alternative interpretation of religious law.
Interesting Fact:
Did you know that while the New Testament doesn’t directly address Mary’s life after the ascension, some traditions suggest she lived for many years in Ephesus, and played a role in the development of the early church? Which raises the question… what kind of church would that be?
New Joke Idea (Playing on that fact):
A group of early Christians are debating a theological point, getting increasingly heated. Finally, one throws their hands up in exasperation. "Enough! Let’s just ask Mary!"
They find Mary in the kitchen, meticulously sharpening a very large collection of rocks.
"Mary," one Christian asks, "what did your son really mean when he said ‘turn the other cheek’?"
Mary glances up, a glint in her eye. "Oh, that? He meant after you’ve made sure they understand the gravity of their initial transgression." She gives a tsk sound, and rolls a rock across the countertop, "kids these days…"