Upon entering heaven, he sees two lines leading to the pearly gates: the free will line, and the predestination line. Naturally he goes to the predestination line.
While waiting in queue, an angel comes up to him and asks, “Why are you in the predestination line?”
“Well,” the man answers, “I’m a Calvinist, so I believe in predestination.”
“If you picked the predestination line, you’ve actually made a free-will choice, so you actually belong in the free will line.”
“Oh okay, apologies for my mistake.” And he gets out of the predestination line and goes into the free will line.
A few minutes later, another angel comes up to him and asks, “What on earth are you doing in the free will line as a Calvinist?”
“I dunno, some angel said I was supposed to be here; it’s like it was predestined to happen or something.”
Joke Poo: The Algorithm
A self-driving car enthusiast dies and ascends to Silicon Heaven. Upon arrival, they see two lanes leading to the cloud-computing gates: the “Rule-Based AI” lane and the “Deep Learning” lane. Naturally, being a firm believer in the power of code, they head for the Rule-Based AI lane.
While waiting, a disembodied voice, clearly powered by natural language processing, booms, “Why are you in the Rule-Based AI lane?”
“Well,” the enthusiast replies, “I believe in explicitly programmed logic! I think AI should be understandable, traceable, and predictable.”
“If you chose the Rule-Based AI lane, that’s an emergent behavior! It wasn’t directly programmed; ergo, you belong in the Deep Learning lane. Your very selection contradicts your deterministic worldview!”
“Oh, okay, my apologies. I must have misinterpreted something.” And they diligently switch to the Deep Learning lane.
A few moments later, another voice, synthesized with an almost uncanny human inflection, asks, “What are you doing in the Deep Learning lane if you believe in rule-based systems?”
“I dunno, some algorithm told me to come here! It’s like my path was predetermined by the training data or something… and now I’m worried about catastrophic forgetting!”
Okay, let’s break down this Calvinist joke and see what comedic gold we can extract.
Joke Analysis:
- Core Concept: The joke hinges on the central tension in Calvinism: the doctrine of predestination vs. the apparent human ability to make choices.
- Setup: A Calvinist arriving in heaven is presented with a choice, immediately highlighting the inherent contradiction.
- Punchline(s): There are two layers of humor:
- The initial irony of choosing the predestination line due to his belief in non-choice.
- The final punchline where he ends up in the free will line, justifying it with “predestined” reasoning, thus inverting the logic again.
- Humor Type: Irony, situational comedy, and philosophical humor (mildly).
Key Elements for Enrichment:
- Calvinism/Predestination: The theological framework.
- Free Will: The opposing philosophical concept.
- Heaven/Angels: The setting introduces a divine and authoritative context.
- Lines/Queues: The mundane image of waiting in line makes the metaphysical debate relatable.
Comedic Enrichment: Did You Know?
Here’s a “Did You Know?” style observation that plays off the original joke:
“Did you know that in the early days of the Reformation, debates about predestination got so heated, some theologians refused to play board games with each other? Imagine trying to explain to John Calvin why you strategically blocked his Tetris piece – “It was ordained that I should achieve a Tetris, my friend! Free will had nothing to do with it.” “
Rationale:
- It relates directly to the Calvinist’s core belief in predestination.
- It uses the idea of a line to highlight a key difference between the two lines.
- It juxtaposes the serious theological debate with something entirely mundane (board games), heightening the comedic contrast.
- Adding Tetris in as the board game of choice gives an unexpected, but potentially interesting twist.