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A computer engineer is tasked with opening a bar.

Posted on July 31, 2025 by Joke Poo

He gets everything sets up. Goes through this QA auditing. He orders a beer. He orders two beers. He orders ten beers. He orders -1 beers. He orders an imaginary beer. He orders pi beers. Orders an elephant. Orders a sfindlkwfoi. He signs off on the bar and leaves.

The first real customer walks in and asks if he can use the restroom. The bar spontaneously combusts and burns down.

stolen from u/cgtiii . I don't know where he stole it from.

Joke Poo: The Software Tester’s Bakery

A software tester is tasked with opening a bakery.

She gets everything set up, runs rigorous QA tests. She orders one croissant. She orders two croissants. She orders ten croissants. She orders -1 croissants. She orders an imaginary croissant. She orders pi croissants. She orders a unicorn. She orders a glagnarblest. She signs off on the bakery and leaves.

The first real customer walks in and asks if they have gluten-free bread. The entire bakery turns into a perfectly rendered 3D model, but then crashes due to an out-of-memory error.

Alright, let’s break down this joke and then build something funnier on top of it.

Joke Dissection:

  • Setup: A computer engineer opens a bar. This immediately sets up the expectation that the engineer will approach bar ownership with a technical, logical mindset.
  • Punchline 1 (Initial absurdity): The engineer’s “QA” process is to throw a series of increasingly nonsensical orders at the bar (including negative beers, imaginary beers, an elephant, and gibberish). This highlights the computer engineer’s testing strategies applied in a completely inappropriate environment.
  • Punchline 2 (The combustion): The bar self-destructs when asked about the restroom. This punchline links back to the engineer’s testing, suggesting the code was not properly prepared for standard customer interaction. It combines absurdity with the logic that there were no restroom considerations in testing, triggering an unexpected consequence in a way a coder might understand.

Key Elements:

  • Computer Engineer Stereotype: Detail-oriented, logical, testing-focused, and prone to over-engineering.
  • QA/Testing: The idea that everything must be rigorously tested before release.
  • Edge Cases/Error Handling: The engineer tests for extreme or illogical inputs, but misses the basic functionality.
  • Unexpected Consequences: Failing to anticipate a standard user action leads to catastrophic failure.

Comedic Enrichment:

Now, let’s leverage some interesting facts related to these elements to build upon the joke:

Witty Observation:

“You know you’re dealing with a true computer engineer running a bar when the happy hour specials are documented in YAML.”

New Joke:

A computer engineer opens a coffee shop. He tests every possible order: single shot, double shot, decaf, half-caf, iced, hot, soy milk, almond milk, oat milk, extra foam, no foam, with a twist of lemon. He tests them all. He even tests orders that break the barista: “A tesseract latte,” “A coffee so bitter it divorces your taste buds,” “Liquid sadness in a cup.”

After six months of testing, the shop opens. The first customer walks in and says, “Good morning!”

The engineer stares blankly, then screams, “That wasn’t in the user stories!” and the shop’s automatic espresso machine goes rogue, creating a caffeine-fueled robot uprising.

Amusing “Did You Know?”:

Did you know that the first computer bug was literally a moth that got stuck in a relay of the Harvard Mark II computer in 1947? It seems our engineer forgot to check if there were moths near the bar, because clearly a moth asking for the restroom would have caused an explosion as well.

Analysis of New Content:

  • New Joke: It builds on the original’s premise but replaces the bar with a coffee shop.
  • Focuses on “User Stories”: A common software development term for defining what a user will do with the software. It points out the engineer’s rigid focus on pre-defined interactions.
  • Amplifies Absurdity: The testing becomes even more ridiculous, and the consequence is escalated to a robot uprising, which emphasizes the over-the-top nature of the engineer’s failures.
  • Witty Observation: It uses a technical term “YAML” to describe complex data structures, which is what a coder might use to create a menu rather than a simple list.

These examples take the foundation of the original joke and enrich it with observations and jokes that enhance the premise.

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