The doctor asked, “What can I do for you?”
The man said, “We’d like you to watch us… you know…make love… and tell us if we’re doing it right.”
The doctor was puzzled but agreed. When they finished, he said, “Everything looks perfectly fine,” and charged them $50.
This went on for several weeks — they’d book an appointment, do their thing, pay the doctor, and leave.
Finally, the doctor asked, “Exactly what are you two trying to find out?”
The man replied, “Oh, we’re not trying to find out anything. She’s married, and we can’t go to her house. I’m married, and we can’t go to mine. The Holiday Inn costs $90, the Hilton is $108… but here it’s only $50 — and I get $43 back from Medicare!”
Joke Poo: The Tech Support Scam
An elderly woman, Mildred, calls tech support.
“Hello,” she says, “my computer keeps freezing. I need help fixing it.”
The tech support agent, clearly reading from a script, replies, “Certainly, ma’am. Let me remotely access your computer so I can diagnose the issue.”
Mildred agrees, and the agent spends the next half hour clicking around, running scans, and generally making it look like he’s doing something complicated. Finally, he says, “Okay, ma’am, I’ve identified the problem. You have a severe virus. To fix it and protect your computer from future attacks, you’ll need our premium security package. It’s a one-time fee of $299.”
Mildred sighs. “Oh dear, not again.”
This continues every week. Mildred calls, the agent “fixes” the same problem, and she pays the $299. Finally, the increasingly exasperated agent asks, “Ma’am, if you know you have this problem every week, why do you keep calling? And why do you keep paying for the same fix?”
Mildred replies, “Well, my grandson told me it was cheaper to pay the tech support guy $299 than to buy a new computer for him when he fills mine with viruses every week.”
Alright, let’s break down this joke and see what comedic gold we can extract.
Joke Deconstruction:
- Core Concept: The humor hinges on a misunderstanding of the therapist’s role and a clever exploitation of healthcare loopholes by a senior couple to secure a cheap, safe place to have an affair. The setup leads the doctor (and the audience) to believe they are seeking genuine therapeutic advice, while the punchline reveals a purely financial motivation.
- Key Elements:
- Age/Senior Status: Emphasizes potential “bedroom difficulties” associated with aging, setting up a plausible reason for therapy.
- Misunderstanding/Subversion of Expectations: We expect a serious therapeutic issue, but get a financial one.
- Affair: The illicit nature of the relationship adds a layer of cheekiness.
- Financial Pragmatism/Medicare Exploitation: The punchline’s brilliance lies in the practical (and slightly shady) resourcefulness of the couple.
- Irony: The therapist, trained in mental health, is unwittingly facilitating a financial transaction disguised as therapy.
Enrichment Attempt: New Joke Inspired by the Original:
A group of financial advisors were baffled. A particular elderly gentleman, a retired plumber named Murray, kept requesting “consultations” with the entire team, multiple times a week. Each session involved Murray rambling about his collection of porcelain thimbles, then politely asking for a detailed assessment of his overall financial health. The advisors, assuming a complex portfolio or hidden wealth, would painstakingly analyze his meager savings and social security income.
Finally, the lead advisor asked, “Mr. Murray, we’re happy to help, but your finances are relatively straightforward. What exactly are you hoping to achieve with these frequent reviews?”
Murray smiled, “Oh, it’s not about the money. See, my grandson is studying to be a Certified Financial Planner, and he needs 100 hours of supervised experience. He’s a terrible plumber, and this way, I get him free training, you get paid by the hour, and I get a free coffee and a biscuit. Everybody wins, except maybe the value of my time. But at my age, time is the one thing I have lots of!”
Why this works (hopefully):
- Mirrors the Misunderstanding: Similar to the original, the setup creates an expectation of a typical financial concern, which is then subverted by a completely different (and somewhat absurd) motive.
- Echoes the Financial Pragmatism: It takes the same spirit of resourceful “optimization” of a system (in this case, CFP training) for personal gain.
- Maintains the Age Element: The senior status contributes to the perceived normalcy of the initial financial advisor’s expectations.
- Uses a different context: Instead of the therapist office we have financial advisors to show that the joke can be used in different situations.
Let me know if you want another enrichment attempt!