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A few minutes before the services started, the townspeople were sitting in their pews and talking.

Posted on August 25, 2025 by Joke Poo

Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church. Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate.

Soon everyone had exited the church except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew without moving, seeming oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy was in his presence.

So Satan walked up to the old man and said, "Don't you know who I am?" The man replied, "Yep, sure do."

"Aren't you afraid of me?" Satan asked.

"Nope, sure ain't," said the man.

"Don't you realize I can kill you with a word?" asked Satan.

"Don't doubt it for a minute," returned the old man, in an even tone.

"Did you know that I could cause you profound, horrifying, physical AGONY… for all eternity?" persisted Satan.

"Yep," was the calm reply.

"And you're still not afraid?" asked Satan.

"Nope."

More than a little perturbed, Satan asked, "Well, why aren't you afraid of me?!"

The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for the last 48 years."

Joke Poo: The Intern’s Burden

A few minutes before the company-wide presentation, the executives were milling around the conference room, nervously chatting. Suddenly, the CEO of a massive, ruthless corporation, known for firing people on a whim, stormed into the room. Everyone froze, a wave of terror washing over them as they scrambled to appear busy, avoiding eye contact with the volatile boss.

Soon everyone had scattered to their seats except for one young intern who stood calmly by the projector, seemingly oblivious to the imminent danger.

So the CEO walked up to the intern and barked, “Don’t you know who I am?” The intern replied, “Yes, sir. Perfectly.”

“Aren’t you afraid of me?” the CEO demanded.

“Not particularly, sir,” said the intern.

“Don’t you realize I can ruin your entire career with a single email?” the CEO growled.

“Probably, sir,” the intern replied, unfazed.

“Did you know that I can make you work insane hours, doing the most demeaning tasks, for basically no pay… for the rest of your internship?” persisted the CEO.

“I assumed as much,” was the calm reply.

“And you’re still not afraid?” asked the CEO, his face turning red.

“Nope.”

Completely baffled, the CEO asked, “Well, why aren’t you afraid of me?!”

The intern calmly replied, “Sir, I’m the one who accidentally set the coffee machine to only dispense decaf this morning.”

Alright, let’s dissect this devilishly good joke!

Key Elements:

  • Setting: A church, typically associated with piety and fear of evil.
  • Character 1: Satan, the ultimate embodiment of evil, power, and fear.
  • Character 2: An elderly gentleman, seemingly unfazed by Satan’s presence.
  • Contrast: The extreme fear of the townspeople versus the old man’s complete lack of it.
  • Twist/Punchline: The old man’s indifference stems from his long marriage to Satan’s sister, implying a much more terrifying and enduring ordeal. The humor comes from the subversion of expectations: Satan, the cause of universal dread, is defanged by the mundane horror of a bad marriage.

Comedic Analysis:

The joke works on several levels. It’s a classic ‘old married couple’ joke in disguise, using the powerful imagery of good vs. evil to amplify the relatable (if exaggerated) experience of marital dissatisfaction. The humor also comes from the power dynamic shift. Satan is usually in control, but the old man has clearly found something more powerful to fear, stripping Satan of his terror.

Enrichment and New Humor:

Let’s leverage some factual tidbits about demons and marriage to create a new, related joke/observation:

Tidbit: In demonology, some lesser demons are said to be responsible for domestic squabbles and discord, specifically between spouses.

New Observation/Joke:

You know, Satan’s always getting a bad rap. All that fire and brimstone? That’s just his therapy for dealing with domestic demons. Turns out, he’s not the Prince of Darkness, he’s just a project manager trying to get his team of squabble-inducing demons to actually do their jobs and stop bickering about who gets to possess the toaster oven. Heck, that’s the real reason Hell has so many layers – it’s just different department meetings, and they all sound the same. So next time you’re having an argument with your partner, remember, Satan feels your pain…and he probably sent a minor imp to stoke the flames.

Explanation:

This new bit takes the original joke’s premise of the mundane undermining the monstrous and extends it. The original joke uses marriage, while this new observation uses the concept of work. Satan’s malevolent nature is reinterpreted as bureaucratic frustration and managing petty interpersonal conflict. It’s a “relatable Satan” angle that leans into the joke’s core comedic element of subverting expectations by humanizing (or rather, “demonizing”) something ordinary. The “domestic demons” tie back to folklore and make the concept of household strife literal, adding a layer of witty wordplay. It also makes us look at our own everyday problems and realize they might not be so bad after all.

Another joke:

Why did Satan start offering marriage counseling in Hell?

Because even eternal damnation is less torturous than listening to his sister and brother-in-law argue about whose turn it is to take out the souls.

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