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A few summers ago I got a job selling dictionaries door-to-door.

Posted on June 12, 2025 by Joke Poo

On my first day I knock on the door of a nice house and a few seconds later a guy answers. He points to a little sign next to his door that reads NO SOLICITATION and asks me, “Do you know what this means?”

I say, “Sir, I know just how to help you with that.”

Joke Poo: Doggy Style

A few weeks ago I took up dog grooming. On my first appointment, I ring the doorbell of a fancy apartment, and a woman opens the door. She gestures towards her poodle, fluffy and pristine, then points to a small, framed photo hanging beside the door that reads: "PREFERRED GROOMING STYLE: SHOW STANDARD."

She looks at me expectantly and asks, "Do you understand?"

I smile, pull out my clippers, and reply, "Ma’am, I’m about to give this dog the dictionary!"

Alright, let’s break down this dictionary salesman joke.

Joke Dissection:

  • Setup: Naive (or perhaps cheeky) dictionary salesman gets a job and encounters a "NO SOLICITATION" sign.
  • Conflict: The sign is a direct impediment to his job, creating an immediate contradiction.
  • Punchline: His response is a clever wordplay, turning the sign’s intent (to deter sales) on its head by highlighting the literal meaning of "solicitation" – which a dictionary can help define.
  • Humor derives from:
    • Irony: He is technically helping them understand the sign even while ignoring it.
    • Subversion: Unexpectedly turning the sign’s purpose against itself.
    • Dry Wit: Delivered with a seemingly straight face, maximizing the impact of the absurdity.

Enrichment & New Humor:

Now, let’s use some facts about dictionaries and solicitation to spice things up.

Did You Know?:

  • The word "solicit" comes from the Latin "sollicitare," meaning "to disturb, agitate, or excite." So, technically, that salesman was promising to agitate the homeowner! (Perhaps with the joys of etymology!)
  • The first English dictionaries were created primarily to standardize spelling and usage, not necessarily to provide definitions. Imagine trying to sell someone on "uniformity" in 1604!
  • Door-to-door sales actually predate the printing press. Imagine trying to sell hand-copied manuscripts to skeptical peasants!

New Witty Observation:

  • "I find it ironic that ‘solicitation’ requires a definition. You’d think the act itself would be self-explanatory, but apparently some people need a dictionary to understand ‘Can I interest you in…?’ translates to ‘Please go away.’"

New Joke:

I saw a documentary about the history of door-to-door dictionary sales. It was fascinating. I learned that back in the day, instead of "No Soliciting" signs, people would just set out bowls of lukewarm tea and say, "We already have the finest dictionary in the empire, thank you very much." It turns out passive-aggressiveness is timeless.

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