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A grandmother takes her grandson to the beach

Posted on July 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

The boy was splashing in the shallows when a sudden riptide carried him out to sea. The grandmother frantically started screaming for help. "Someone help! My grandson! My grandson! He's drowning!"

Without a moment's hesitation, the lifeguard did a soaring frontflip off his tower, rolled when he hit the sand, and sprinted into the ocean. He tore through the current as he swam toward the boy who was about to go under. The lifeguard dove beneath the surface and after what seemed like an eternity, emerged with the boy in his arms.

A small crowd had gathered on the shore was the lifeguard was performing CPR on the boy. Exhausted from retrieving the child, the lifeguard gave it all of might. Finally, the boy coughed up water and took in a much-needed breath of air. The lifeguard fell to the sand in exhaustion as the crowed clapped and cheered for him. The boy had been saved.

When the cheers died down, the boy's grandmother walked over to the lifeguard and said, "He had a hat…"

Joke Poo: The Intern’s Latte

A demanding CEO brings his new intern to a high-stakes negotiation at a trendy coffee shop. The CEO orders an elaborate, multi-layered latte with specific instructions. The intern, flustered, takes the order to the barista.

While waiting, disaster strikes! A rogue drone carrying advertising banners malfunctions and crashes directly into the coffee shop, sending debris and hot beverages flying. The CEO is buried under a pile of foam and oat milk.

Without missing a beat, the intern, a former competitive eater, dives into the mess. He rapidly scoops out chunks of coffee-soaked debris, dodges falling latte art, and locates the CEO beneath the cappuccino carnage. He performs a series of Heimlich maneuvers, expertly dislodging a rogue coffee bean from the CEO’s windpipe.

A small crowd of onlookers, including rival executives, marvel at the intern’s quick thinking and heroic actions. The CEO, sputtering and covered in foam, gasps for air. He’s alive! The negotiation can continue.

When the applause subsides, the CEO, still dripping with latte, looks sternly at the intern and says, “It was supposed to be decaf…”

Alright, let’s analyze this joke.

Joke Breakdown:

  • Setup: Grandmother and grandson at the beach. A dangerous situation (riptide) arises.
  • Rising Action: Lifeguard performs a heroic rescue. Dramatic tension builds.
  • Climax: The boy is saved through the lifeguard’s heroic efforts. Gratitude is implied.
  • Punchline: The grandmother’s concern is about the hat, completely missing the gravity and heroism of the situation. The focus is on a trivial, material possession at a time when gratitude for the boy’s life would be expected.
  • Humor: The humor comes from the unexpected and inappropriate response of the grandmother. It’s a subversion of expectations. We expect relief and gratitude, but we get superficiality and material concern.

Key Elements:

  • Riptide: A dangerous ocean current.
  • Lifeguard: A symbol of heroism and safety.
  • Grandmother: Represents a certain type of person (potentially materialistic, oblivious, or simply focused on the specific object).
  • Hat: a symbol of materialism and triviality.
  • Rescue: Heroic, life-saving action.
  • C.P.R. A life-saving procedure.

Comedic Enrichment:

Let’s leverage the CPR aspect and lifeguard heroics for a “Did You Know?” style joke:

New Humor Piece:

Did you know: The average lifeguard, after successfully performing CPR, is estimated to have pumped about 1.5 gallons of water out of a drowning victim. Which is why, after a rescue, the most common lifeguard request isn’t for a thank you, but for a mop and a really strong bleach solution. And maybe for grandma to chip in for a new hat. You know, the one that went down with the ship, or, er, the grandkid.

Explanation of Enrichment:

  • Factual Element: The estimate of 1.5 gallons of water is plausible and adds a touch of absurdity.
  • Twist: The focus shifts from gratitude to the practical (and slightly gross) consequences of the rescue.
  • Call-back: The “grandma and a new hat” part directly references the original joke, emphasizing the grandmother’s misplaced priorities.
  • Humor: The humor comes from the juxtaposition of the heroic act with the mundane reality of the cleanup, plus the return to the grandma’s trivial concern.
    • The “ship” reference adds another layer of humor.

This new piece builds on the elements of the original joke but frames them in a slightly different way, adding a layer of absurdity and making the humor a bit broader while still referencing the punchline.

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