— Well, Dad, I’ve decided! I’m gonna get married.
— Who’re you gonna marry, son?
— Lisa, Mike’s daughter.
— Oh, don’t marry her, son, you know… Ah, fine! I’ll admit it — I sinned in my youth — long story short, she’s your sister.
— Well then, maybe I’ll marry Emily, the neighbor girl…
— No, son, I messed up back in the day… she’s your sister too.
— Then how about Mandy from the next block…
— Don’t take her either. Same story — she’s also your sister.
At this point Mom can’t take it anymore and yells from the kitchen:
— Don’t listen to that idiot! Marry whoever you want — he’s not your father anyway!
Joke Poo: The Alien Adoption
An alien blob decides to settle down.
— Dad-blob, I’ve made up my mind! I’m going to bond!
— Who are you going to bond with, son-blob?
— Globnar, from the Zorp cluster.
— Oh, don’t bond with Globnar, son-blob! You know… Alright, fine! I’ll absorb it! I sinned in my youth – long story short, she’s a clone of you!
— Well then, maybe I’ll bond with Flurp, the energy being down the nebula…
— No, son-blob, I gooped up back in the day… she’s also a clone of you!
— Then how about Gleepglorp from the Andromeda Galaxy…
— Don’t bond with it either. Same story – she’s also a clone of you.
At this point, Mom-blob slithers from the primordial soup vat:
— Ignore that amorphous slimeball! Bond with whomever you want – he’s not your progenitor anyway! You were synthesized!
Okay, let’s break down this joke:
Joke Analysis:
- Setup: Establishes a classic father-son conversation about marriage.
- Premise: The father reveals a series of inconvenient truths, revealing that multiple potential partners are all the son’s half-sisters due to the father’s past indiscretions. This is the comedic core.
- Punchline: The mother’s outburst delivers a twist, revealing the father’s claims are irrelevant because he isn’t the son’s biological father anyway. This upends the entire scenario and delivers the final comedic payoff.
- Key Elements:
- Incestuous relationships (potential, but ultimately avoided): This is the taboo element that creates tension and humor.
- Past Sins: The father’s promiscuous past is the direct cause of the initial problem.
- Revelation: The series of revelations by the father and then the mother drive the joke forward.
- Unreliable Narrator: The father seems to be giving truthful advice, but the mother’s revelation throws doubt on everything he says.
- The Mother as the Voice of Truth (or Chaos): She drops the bombshell.
Comedic Enrichment & New Humor:
Now, let’s leverage these elements to create some related humor. I’ll focus on the “unreliable narrator” and the “past sins” aspects.
New Bit: The Genealogical Amnesia Defense
Observation:
“It’s fascinating how easily ‘genetic memory’ kicks in when someone needs an excuse. ‘I have a gambling problem, it’s in my genes!’ But when asked about potential family members at a wedding, suddenly everyone’s got genealogical amnesia. ‘Cousin Mildred? Vaguely ring a bell. Pretty sure we’re not that related.'”
- Why this works: It plays on the real-world phenomenon of selective memory when it comes to family history and embarrassing traits. It connects to the joke’s theme of unreliable information and conveniently forgotten (or fabricated) familial connections.
Related joke:
A man is on trial, accused of embezzling funds. He pleads, “But Your Honor, I couldn’t help myself! My grandfather was a notorious thief!”
The judge raises an eyebrow, “And what about the money you gambled away?”
The man shrugs, “Oh, I have absolutely no idea where that came from. No family history of gambling, I assure you.”