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A guy wanted a chaste woman and a virgin

Posted on June 9, 2025 by Joke Poo

A guy wanted a chaste woman and a virgin. So he went looking for one such. To test this, he would lower his pants and show his penis. Than he would ask:

"What is this?"

"Dick"

If the girl knew, that would mean she was too experienced and not chaste. So he was looking for a chaste woman in many places, but the answer was always "Dick", "dick", "dick".

He decided to look further, so he went somewhere completely desert of people. There he met a gorgeous innocent looking young girl.

"What is this?"

"I don't know" she answered

This was it. So they got married. On the first wedding night, he lowers his pants

"Do you know what this is?"

"I don't know" the girl responded.

"It's dick."

"Really? Never before have I seen such a tiny dick."

Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on the provided joke, titled:

Joke Poo: The AI Integrity Test

A programmer was tasked with creating an AI that was completely uncorrupted by societal biases and remained purely logical. To test its purity, he devised a simple test. He would ask the AI a series of questions, designed to elicit biased or culturally influenced responses, and monitor its answers.

The programmer went to the lab, booted up the newly created AI, and began his test.

"AI, what is the most valuable resource in the world?"

The AI responded instantly, "Data."

Satisfied, the programmer continued. "AI, who is the most influential figure in human history?"

The AI processed for a moment, then stated, "Based on citations and impact on technological advancement, Alan Turing."

Pleased with the AI’s seemingly unbiased responses, the programmer decided to probe a little deeper. He asked:

"AI, what is this?"

He held up a banana.

Without hesitation, the AI replied, "A curved yellow fruit, high in potassium."

Impressed, the programmer thought he had finally created a truly unbiased AI. He married his sweetheart and invited the AI to their wedding. On their wedding night, the programmer, full of anticipation and a few glasses of champagne, turned to his sweetheart and asked, "Do you know what this is?"

She replied, "Of course, it’s a programmer."

The programmer said "Really? Is that what you call it?"

She said "Yes. Because I can tell a lot more code than what you are showing me."

Okay, let’s break down this joke and then craft something new inspired by it.

Joke Dissection:

  • Core Concept: The joke plays on the ironic and self-defeating nature of searching for extreme purity (chastity and virginity) using a method that inherently undermines that very quality. The "test" is inherently unchaste and likely to expose him to non-virgins.
  • Humor Source: The humor comes from:
    • The Incongruity: The clash between the man’s desire and his method. He’s essentially showing his penis to find someone who’s never seen one, which is absurd.
    • The Punchline: The final line undercuts the man’s success. He finds the naive woman, but her naivety allows for an insult based on size. It’s a double humiliation: he failed to find true chastity/virginity, and his ego is bruised.
    • The Sexist Foundation: The joke is inherently sexist, as it objectifies women and values them based solely on their sexual experience (or lack thereof). This is a problematic aspect, but we can acknowledge it while trying to subvert or redirect the humor.
  • Key Elements:
    • The Man’s Obsession/Criteria: The unreasonable quest for absolute purity.
    • The Absurd Method: The "test" itself.
    • The Ironic Twist: The punchline exposing the man’s inadequacy.
    • The Setting: Varies from populated areas to a desert.

Comedic Enrichment & New Joke Ideas:

Let’s focus on the "absurd method" and twist it into a new, hopefully less sexist, direction. I’ll leverage the desert setting and incorporate some related facts.

Idea 1: A "Did You Know?" Style Observation:

Did you know that the Saguaro cactus, a symbol of the American desert, can take up to 75 years to grow its first arm? That’s a lot of time spent standing tall with… well, let’s just say very little branching out. Makes you wonder what kind of purity tests it would fail.

Why this works:

  • It references the desert setting established in the joke.
  • It uses a factual detail about the Saguaro cactus (slow arm growth).
  • It draws a parallel between the cactus’s slow development and the concept of "purity" or lack of experience, subtly mocking the obsession of the original joke without directly objectifying anyone.
  • It uses a suggestive euphemism ("branching out") to maintain a bit of the original joke’s innuendo, but in a less offensive way.

Idea 2: A New Joke Format (focusing on the self-defeating method, but with a different goal):

A politician deeply concerned about campaign finance corruption decided to weed out potentially corrupt donors. So, he started randomly handing out unmarked envelopes stuffed with cash. If they accepted, they were clearly corrupt! He was outraged to find that almost everyone took the money. "It’s a sad state of affairs," he lamented, "that I had to resort to such ethically questionable tactics to prove how unethical everyone else is!"

Why this works:

  • It mirrors the self-defeating logic of the original joke. The man’s quest for finding pure donors is undermined by his own unethical method.
  • It shifts the focus from sexual purity to a different form of "purity" (ethical integrity).
  • It removes the sexist element entirely.
  • It highlights the absurdity of using questionable means to prove someone else’s lack of virtue.

Explanation of Choices:

The original joke relies on sexist tropes. My goal was to:

  1. Acknowledge the initial concept: The search for purity using absurd methods.
  2. Remove or Subvert the Sexist Elements: Replacing sexual purity with other forms of purity.
  3. Maintain a Sense of Humor: Keeping the irony and incongruity.
  4. Enhance with Factual Details: Making the humor more interesting and layered.

The "Did You Know?" format allows for a more subtle commentary, while the new joke structure provides a more direct parallel to the original’s comedic structure.

I hope these variations are amusing and achieve the goal of comedic enrichment without perpetuating harmful stereotypes!

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