Recently, a large corporation hired several cannibals to increase their diversity, "You are all part of our team now," said the Human Resources rep during the welcoming briefing. "You get all the usual benefits and you can go to the cafeteria for something to eat, but please don't eat any employees."
The cannibals promised they would not.
Four weeks later their boss remarked, "You're all working very hard and I'm satisfied with your work. We have noticed a marked increase in the whole company's performance. However, one of our secretaries has disappeared. Do any of you know what happened to her?"
The cannibals all shook their heads, "No."
After the boss had left, the leader of the cannibals said to the others, "Which one of you idiots ate the secretary?" A hand rose hesitantly. "You fool!" the leader continued. "For four weeks we've been eating managers and no one noticed anything. But now, you had to go and eat someone who actually does something."
Joke Poo: The Garden Gnome Guild
A prestigious garden gnome guild, renowned for their artistic lawn ornamentation, decided to expand their offerings by hiring several trolls to boost their moss-crafting division.
“Welcome to the team,” said the Guild Master during the orientation. “You’ll enjoy excellent mushroom tea breaks and all the finest in polished pebble mosaics, but please, do not smash any of the gnomes.”
The trolls grumbled their agreement, promising gnome-smashing abstinence.
A month later, the Guild Master noticed a sharp drop in gnome attendance and confronted the trolls. “Your moss-crafting is truly impressive! Sales have never been better. However, several gnomes have gone missing. Do any of you know anything about this?”
The trolls looked shifty, and shook their enormous heads, murmuring denials.
After the Guild Master left, the biggest troll bellowed, “Which one of you nitwits has been crunching gnomes?!” A small, green hand quivered. “You dolt!” roared the troll leader. “For weeks, we’ve been snacking on lawn flamingos, and nobody batted an eye! But you just had to munch on the lucky gnomes – now everything will be cursed!”
Okay, let’s dissect this joke and see what comedic nuggets we can extract.
Joke Dissection:
- Premise: A corporation hires cannibals for diversity, but warns them not to eat employees.
- Setup: The cannibals initially behave and integrate into the workplace.
- Twist/Punchline: The cannibals did eat someone, but the leader is upset not because of the moral implications, but because they ate someone useful (the secretary), revealing a skewed sense of what’s valuable within the corporate hierarchy.
- Key Elements:
- Cannibalism (taboo subject made humorous).
- Corporate Culture/Hierarchy (lampooned).
- Diversity Initiatives (used ironically).
- Workplace Value (what is valued in workers?).
Comedic Enrichment/New Humor:
Let’s focus on the “Workplace Value” element. The joke implies that managers are expendable in the eyes of the cannibals (and perhaps satirically, in the corporation’s eyes as well, since nobody noticed for weeks). This opens up opportunities for commentary on the perception of different roles within a company.
New Joke/Observation:
A company was struggling to meet its quarterly goals. Desperate, the CEO called a meeting and announced, “Okay team, drastic times. To cut costs, we’re going to have to let go of some… non-essential personnel.” A brave intern piped up, “Sir, are we talking about layoffs, or are we going to be doing what the cannibals did, and targeting managers?” The CEO paused, stroked his chin thoughtfully, and replied, “Well, the initial plan was layoffs, but now you’ve given me something to really chew on…”
Amusing “Did You Know” (playing off the original):
Did you know that in some cultures, there’s a symbolic form of cannibalism involving leadership? It’s called “eating your young.” Okay, not literally. It’s when a company’s older generation of managers refuses to mentor or make way for new talent, effectively devouring their potential. Ironically, these companies are often the ones complaining about a “skills gap”… maybe they just digested all the skills years ago!
Explanation of the New Humor:
- The new joke extends the original joke’s theme of workplace value in a different direction, more specifically on the concept of manager roles.
- The “Did You Know” uses the dark humor of cannibalism to make a pointed observation about corporate succession planning.
By focusing on one element of the original joke and building upon it with factual or interesting tidbits, we can create new, related pieces of humor that resonate with the same comedic themes.