When suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was hopping up and down with rage, complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW.
"Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer!!!" he shrieked.
"You lawyers are so materialistic it's amazing!!!" retorted the officer, "You're so worried about your BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!!!"
"Oh no…." replied the lawyer, looking down and noticing for the first time the bloody stump where his left arm had once been.
"Where's Mmmmy Rolex?!?!?!"
Joke Poo: The Astronaut’s Dilemma
An astronaut exited his lunar lander, taking his first steps on the moon. As he planted the American flag, a rogue meteoroid zipped past, shearing off the flagpole. When mission control contacted him, the astronaut was hopping up and down in low gravity, ranting about the desecration of the symbol of American achievement.
“Control, this is Apollo! Look what they’ve done to Old Glory!!!” he yelled into his comms.
“Astronaut, you’re so focused on national pride it’s astounding!” retorted the CAPCOM, “You’re so upset about the flag, you haven’t even noticed that your left leg was vaporized!”
“Oh no….” replied the astronaut, looking down at the now-empty space where his leg had been.
“Where’s my Neil Armstrong autograph?!?!?!?”
Alright, let’s get to work on this comedic gem!
Joke Dissection:
- Setup: A lawyer’s BMW door is ripped off by a passing car.
- Punchline Premise: The lawyer is more concerned with the damage to his car than his own (missing) arm.
- Target: Lawyers, perceived as materialistic and obsessed with status symbols.
- Humor Style: Satire, situational irony, character-based.
- Key Elements: BMW, Rolex, Lawyer, Materialism, Physical Injury (arm ripped off), Police Officer
Observations:
- The impact is heightened by the delayed realization of the missing limb. The Rolex is the final crescendo of comical materialism.
New Humor Creation:
Approach 1: Witty Observation (Playing on the “Lawyer” Stereotype and the “Rolex”):
- “You know, they say a Rolex is a status symbol. For some lawyers, it’s also their primary medical alert system. ‘If found, return to…oh, never mind.'”
Why it Works: This observation acknowledges the lawyer’s obsession with the watch, and also alludes to the fact that the watch is now lost, too, and there’s no hope for the lawyer.
Approach 2: Updated Joke (Playing on modern status symbol):
A tech CEO opened the door of his Tesla when a scooter zipped by and took the door clean off. When the police arrived, the CEO was beside himself, ranting about the damage to his car. “Officer, look at what they did to my self-driving machine!”
“You tech bros are so out of touch!” the officer retorted. “You’re worried about your car, and you haven’t even noticed you’re covered in avocado toast!”
The CEO looked down, bewildered. “Oh my god… where’s my crypto wallet?”
Why it works: The joke structure remains the same, but the replaced elements align with modern stereotypes. Tesla replaces BMW, avocado toast replaces arm (linking to a stereotype of health-conscious but oblivious techies), and crypto wallet replaces Rolex.
Approach 3: “Did You Know?” (Factoid twist on materialism):
“Did you know that the most common ‘near-death experience’ reported by lawyers isn’t seeing a white light? It’s briefly imagining they’re going to have to downsize their yacht.”
Why it Works: This plays on the stereotype of lawyers’ wealth and adds a surreal twist to a common saying, reinforcing the materialism humor.