A man is walking past a farm one day, and sees the farmer holding a pig up under an apple tree. Every time the farmer lifts up the pig, the pig bites off an apple.
The man walks up to the farmer. “What are you doing?”
“Feeding my pig,” says the farmer.
“Well, you know if you just shook the tree and let the apples fall to the ground, you could save a lot of time?”
The farmer shrugs, “Yeah, but what’s time to a pig?”
Joke Poo: The Existential Excrement
A woman is walking through a modern art museum one day and sees an artist meticulously arranging tiny piles of…well, it looks like excrement of varying hues on a large white canvas. Each time the artist painstakingly positions a turd, she steps back to analyze it with a critical eye.
The woman walks up to the artist. “What are you doing?”
“Creating my masterpiece,” says the artist, dabbing a particularly vibrant brown specimen with a miniature brush.
“Well,” the woman says, “Wouldn’t it be easier to just use paint? You’d get a wider color palette and avoid the, uh, smell?”
The artist sighs dramatically. “Perhaps. But what’s art to a turd?”
Okay, let’s dissect this pig-and-apple joke and see what comedic seeds we can cultivate.
Joke Breakdown:
- Setup: A man observes an inefficient, repetitive task (farmer lifting pig to eat apples).
- Premise: The farmer is feeding the pig apples in a bizarrely labor-intensive way.
- Punchline: The farmer’s response, “What’s time to a pig?” which implies pigs don’t value time, so the inefficiency doesn’t matter. This is funny because it subverts expectations; we assume the farmer should care about his time.
- Humor Type: Observational, Absurdist, and slightly self-deprecating (the farmer knows it’s silly but doesn’t care). It relies on the contrast between human practicality and animal obliviousness.
Key Elements for Enrichment:
- Pigs: Their intelligence, eating habits, and general perceived lack of concern.
- Apples: Their history, varieties, and symbolic meaning (knowledge, temptation, etc.).
- Time: Its value, how humans perceive it, and how animals might (or might not).
- Farming: Traditional methods, modern efficiency, and the farmer’s relationship with their livestock.
Comedic Enrichment Attempts:
1. Witty Observation/Did You Know:
“You know, the farmer’s logic makes a weird kind of sense. Pigs are surprisingly intelligent, but they have zero concept of long-term planning. A pig would happily spend an hour slowly munching on an apple lifted to its mouth, completely oblivious to the fact that with a little cooperation, they could have had an orchard’s worth of cider apples in 5 minutes. It’s a bit like how humans waste time scrolling through endless content when we could be learning a new skill. Only difference is, the pig probably thinks it has it all figured out.”
2. Alternate Punchline:
Farmer: “Yeah, I thought about that. But if I just shook the tree, the apples would get all bruised. See, this here is a prime apple-fed, free-range ham. I gotta maintain the quality!”
(This version adds a layer of absurdity; the farmer’s concerned about the apple’s condition, not the pig’s or his own time. And sets up a punchline that the pig will become ham)
3. Expanding the Setup (New Joke):
“A consultant walks onto a farm and sees the farmer painstakingly lifting a pig to bite apples from a tree. The consultant, naturally, is aghast. ‘Sir,’ he says, ‘we can drastically improve your apple-pig yield with a targeted synergy program. First, we leverage vertical integration by training the pig in basic arboricultural techniques…’ The farmer stares blankly. The consultant continues, ‘Then, through strategic crop rotation and lean apple management…'”
“The farmer interrupts. ‘Look, I get it. It’s inefficient. But you haven’t factored in the pig’s morale. He loves this. It’s his exercise routine! Plus, he gets to yell at the crows when he’s up there. It’s a whole ‘thing.’ “
4. Pig Facts Meet Humor:
“Fun fact: pigs are incredibly smart, but you’d never guess it watching this farmer. I mean, pigs can be trained to play video games for food. I wonder if this farmer could train the pig to climb the tree itself? Probably not. He’s clearly too busy philosophizing about the nature of porcine time management.”
Explanation of Choices:
- Witty Observation: Connects the pig’s behavior to human tendencies for procrastination and inefficiency, making the joke relatable.
- Alternate Punchline: Emphasizes the farmer’s warped priorities and amplifies the absurdity.
- Expanded Setup: Pokes fun at corporate jargon and the tendency to over-analyze simple situations.
- Pig Facts Meet Humor: Combines surprising pig intelligence facts with a sarcastic comment on the farmer’s methods.
The goal is to take the original joke’s core absurdity and either highlight it with factual information or push it to a new level of comedic incongruity.