He enters the shop and explains his situation, the storeman directs him to their selection and picks up the first prosthetic hand.
"This is one of our highest quality prosthetic hands, will feel as close to having the touch in your fingers as you were prior the incident. It costs $1,500".
"No thank you, that is too expensive for me.", says the man, "Do you have anything cheaper?"
The storeman nods his head and picks up the next prosthetic hand.
"This one is almost as good as the other one, it has received multiple high reviews from our customers. It costs $900".
Again the man argues, "No thank you, that is too expensive still, do you have anything else?".
The storeman nods his head and picks up the last prosthetic arm on the rack.
"This is our cheapest prosthetic arm, it costs $650, however we only have it in a green colour".
The man again responds, "No thank you, that is still too expensive and I despise the colour green."
The storeman, out of options, tells the man, "Across the road there is an old man close to death selling his prosthetic hand, from the old man you can go and buy your third hand second hand first hand".
Joke Poo: The Second-Hand Spacesuit
An astronaut ran out of funding halfway through building his own personal spaceship and needed a spacesuit. He goes to a space surplus store to purchase a spacesuit.
He enters the shop and explains his situation. The store clerk directs him to their selection and points to the first spacesuit.
“This is one of our top-of-the-line models. It comes with a built-in climate control system, emergency oxygen reserves, and a self-cleaning visor. It costs $15,000.”
“No thank you, that is way too expensive!”, says the astronaut. “Do you have anything cheaper?”
The store clerk nods and points to the next spacesuit.
“This one is nearly as good as the first. It’s got a slightly older climate control system, but it’s still reliable. It costs $9,000.”
Again the astronaut argues, “No thank you, that is still too expensive. Do you have anything else?”
The store clerk nods and points to the last spacesuit on the rack.
“This is our cheapest spacesuit. It costs $6,500. However, it’s only available in a bright polka-dot pattern.”
The astronaut shakes his head, “No thank you, that is still too expensive and I would rather be caught by the Space Police than be seen wearing polka dots in Space!”
The store clerk, out of options, tells the astronaut, “Well, down the street is another space surplus store, where a nearly bankrupt space station owner is selling his old space station, with a space suit. From the space station owner you can go and buy your third suit, station hand second hand first hand.”
Okay, let’s dissect this joke and then enhance it with some humor!
Joke Dissection:
- Core Concept: A man seeks an affordable prosthetic hand, but finds even the cheapest options too expensive and undesirable (due to color).
- Punchline: The storeman’s wordplay-heavy suggestion to buy a “third hand second hand first hand” from a dying man across the street.
- Humor Derives From:
- Misery Humor/Dark Humor: Trivializing a serious situation (loss of a hand) for comedic effect.
- Economic Absurdity: Highlighting the cost of prosthetics and suggesting incredibly cheap alternatives.
- Wordplay: The convoluted and nonsensical phrase “third hand second hand first hand.” This is the core of the punchline. It’s funny because it sounds plausible at first, then the layers of “hand ownership” collapse into meaninglessness.
- Irony: The man is being overly picky about color, when he could just get one that would help him function.
Enrichment & Extension:
Here’s how we can add another layer of humor, leveraging factual tidbits or further absurdities:
Approach 1: The “Unintended Consequences” Route
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Tidbit: Did you know that advancements in prosthetic technology are increasingly focused on neural interfaces? This allows for more intuitive control and sensory feedback.
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New Joke/Observation: “The man stormed out of the prosthetic shop, grumbling about the price of “first-generation” robotic hands. He’d heard about these new, mind-controlled ones, but even used they were pricier than a decent car. He sighed. Guess he’d stick to writing scathing online reviews with his other hand – at least until someone figured out how to hack the hospital’s 3D printer for some DIY bio-printing. Then, he could have all the hands he wanted.”
- Humor: Plays on the escalation of technology, modern DIY culture and the desire of some people to get free or cheap things. It also has a subtle dig at internet reviewers.
Approach 2: The “Historical Inaccuracy” Route
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Tidbit: Early prosthetics (before specialized manufacturing) were often created by blacksmiths or carpenters, using materials like wood, leather, and metal.
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New Joke/Observation: “The storeman’s suggestion wasn’t as crazy as it seemed. Back in the day, prosthetic hands were practically folk art. You’d find ’em in antique shops alongside wagon wheels and suspiciously-shaped hammers. The real problem wasn’t finding a hand, it was finding one that didn’t smell vaguely of turpentine or have a ‘Property of Jebediah’ brand seared into the palm.”
- Humor: Amplifies the absurdity of a “secondhand” prosthetic by invoking a specific historical context (or a very inaccurate version of it), highlighting the lack of quality standards.
Approach 3: The “Customer Service” Route
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Tidbit: Customer service expectations are at an all time high.
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New Joke/Observation: “The man, aghast at the storeman’s suggestion, immediately left a one-star review online: ‘Unbelievable! I come in looking for a basic prosthetic, and this guy tries to upsell me on a pre-owned limb from a dying guy?! The green one looked nice, but was too cheap for my status. No wonder their customer service rating is so low!’ He then contacted the store’s manager requesting a refund of his Uber fare and compensation for emotional distress.”
- Humor: Plays on the sense of entitlement many customers feel, making light of the situation.
Final Thoughts:
The original joke is okay, but the “third hand second hand first hand” wordplay is the core of its appeal. The additional jokes/observations above aim to heighten the absurdity, leveraging modern technological advancements, historical misconceptions, and customer service stereotypes to generate new layers of humor. The key is to riff on the initial premise while adding a fresh, unexpected twist.