Skip to content
Joke Poo
Menu
  • Home
    • The Enduring Power of a Good Joke
  • Categories
    • Totally Feckin random
    • Why Did
    • Long
    • Wife
    • Walks into a bar
    • Dog
    • Bartender
    • Husband
    • Doctor
    • Chicken
  • Privacy Policy
Menu
Joke Poo

A pirate goes to the doctor and asks for the moles on his back to be checked

Posted on September 19, 2025 by Joke Poo

The doctor says “they’re benign”.
The prate says “check again matey, there be ten”

Happy talk like a pirate day you scallywags.

Joke Poo: The Astronaut’s Alibi

An astronaut is being questioned by mission control after a bizarre incident in the space station. He insists he’s been nowhere near the hydroponics bay.

Mission control replies, “But we found soil on your boots.”

The astronaut shouts back, “Check again, Lieutenant, there be planets!”

Alright, let’s hoist the colors and analyze this pirate joke!

Joke Dissection:

  • Setup: A pirate visits a doctor to have moles checked. This establishes a common scenario and the pirate character, setting the stage for a pun.
  • Punchline: The doctor says “they’re benign,” which is then humorously misinterpreted by the pirate as “there be ten” because the word “benign” sounds like “be nine” when spoken with a pirate accent.
  • Key Elements:
    • Pirate stereotype (accent, “matey,” “be”)
    • Medical context (doctor’s visit, moles, benign)
    • Phonetic Pun (“benign” vs. “be nine/ten”)

Comedic Enrichment:

Now, let’s use some interesting tidbits about these elements to create a new joke/observation.

Factoid: Pirates and Medical Knowledge: Surprisingly, pirates weren’t always completely ignorant of medicine. In fact, they often had skilled surgeons onboard their ships! Pirate ships often had worse conditions that navy vessels for disease to spread in. Pirate surgeons were more likely to treat wounds that may kill a soldier than naval surgeons, as they lacked the strict medical codes.

New Joke/Observation:

Why did the pirate apply to medical school? He heard that learning about the benign and malignant tumors was a good way to become a be nine – be ten specialist…and get a leg up on the competition! After all, no other job offers this many amputations.

Todays SH1T Jokes

  • A young woman goes in to a bank….
  • What did Jay-Z call his wife before they got married?
  • A pirate goes to the doctor and asks for the moles on his back to be checked
  • A Spanish man went into a department store to buy socks.
  • An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar
  • I said to my wife, “My Olympic condoms have arrived. I think I’ll wear gold tonight.”
  • An ice cream truck is driving through a neighborhood.
  • A young man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, “If you kiss me, I’ll turn into a beautiful princess”.
  • Late night phone call
  • I went to the doctors the other day. The doc said “So what can I do for you?”…
  • My son has just come out as gay.
  • What do you call a woman who throws all her collections letters in the fire?
  • Did you know Bruce Lee has a brother that’s vegan?
  • Joe, 40, suffers a heart attack and is admitted to the ICU for observation.
  • Fun fact: the Mortal Kombat theme was originally composed in a Nordic church.
  • A guy walks into a pharmacy..
  • I despise people who take drugs.
  • A grizzled old sea captain walks into a bar with a peg leg, an eye patch, and a hook for a hand.
  • A man is driving along a remote road at night when a state trooper pulls him over.
  • A man walks into a store. Inside, the cashier is crying, while another angry customer is yelling at her
  • There’s a planet full of people who believe in antiinduction:
  • What do you call a horse who lives in the stable next door?
  • Hey Dad, have you seen my sunglasses anywhere?
  • Samurai Swords
  • The New Farmhand
  • Tonight we are having Himalayan rabbit stew for dinner.
  • A man walks into a bar…
  • Teacher’s Assignment To 5th Graders
  • A fly was hovering 6 inches above a river.
  • A monk turns 18, and leaves the monastery and goes to town for the very first time. As he’s walking down the street a hooker says, “Hey father! How about a little head? Ten bucks.”
  • Two nuns are painting an office at the rectory on a hot summer day.
  • Couple Gets Pulled Over By Cop
  • An old man calls his son and says, “Listen, your mother and I are getting a divorce. Forty-five years of misery is more than enough for anyone.”
  • My roommate Joseph
  • A woman visits the Doctor…
  • A man was remodeling his kitchen in French Revolutionary style, when a grenade flew in through the window.
  • Have you heard that Medieval Times is starting a vegetarian restaurant?
  • The country girl and the farm hand
  • How many Facebook users does it take to change a lightbulb?
  • A man walks into the library and inquires about the book “Pavlov’s Dog and Schrödinger’s Cat.
  • Flat out impressive
  • I know a guy who is 4’2″ tall. I found out he had his wallet stolen by a pick pocket.
  • A ventriloquist’s car had broken down in Wales…
  • A man and a dog are playing chess.
  • Two prawns are swimming along one day…
  • I called my wife and asked her bra size. She said, “…um, why?”
  • A lost dog wanders into the jungle. A lion spots him from a distance and thinks, “Huh… never seen one of these before. Looks edible.
  • A blond jock, fresh out of a state-approved teacher prep program, lands a job as a PE teacher for 16-year-old boys.
  • Why do Aussies decide who pays for dinner over chess?
  • Wedding night

Categories

  • "Walks into a bar"
  • Bartender
  • Blonde
  • Chicken
  • Dirty
  • Doctor
  • Dog
  • Heaven
  • Husband
  • Irishman
  • Knock Knock
  • Knock-Knock Joke
  • Lawyer
  • Lightbulb
  • Long
  • Mother-in-law
  • Politician
  • Priest
  • Religion
  • Totally Feckin random
  • Walks into a bar
  • What's the difference
  • Why Did
  • Wife
©2025 Joke Poo | Design: Newspaperly WordPress Theme