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A politician dies and ends up at pearly gates.

Posted on August 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

Saint Peter says, we have a new policy for people in your profession. You get to spend one day in heaven and one day in hell, after which you get to decide where you want to spend the eternity.

He goes to the heaven first where he finds angels singing and people playing harps. Heaven seems quite boring to him.

The next day he goes to hell and to his surprise, he sees lush greenery, luxurious 5 star hotels instead of barren wasteland and people being tortured. He is greeted by Satan, who is wearing a tuxedo and siping on a martini. He says hell is misrepresented by humans. We have luxury hotels, best chefs and top notch sports facilities including a large pool. The politician spends his day enjoying the luxuries in hell.

The next day he is sent to the pearly gates and chooses to live in hell from now on.

He is sent to hell, but this time he sees only a barren wasteland, illuminated by rivers of lava and the screams of people being tortured. Once again he sees Satan in tuxedo, siping on a martini, and asks, what happened to the hotels ?

The Satan replies, yesterday we were campaigning and today you voted !!

Joke Poo: The Software Engineer

A newly graduated software engineer dies and finds himself at the pearly gates.

Saint Peter says, “We have a new policy for recent CS grads. You get to spend one day with the senior engineers in Heaven and one day with the devs in Hell, after which you get to decide where you want to spend eternity.”

He goes to Heaven first, where he finds perfectly documented code, zero bugs, and everyone attending daily stand-up meetings with serene smiles. Heaven seems rather…dull.

The next day, he goes to Hell. To his surprise, he finds a sprawling campus with ping pong tables, free snacks, and everyone frantically coding to upbeat music. He’s greeted by a grinning Devil, sporting a “Keep Calm and Commit” t-shirt. The Devil says, “Hell’s code is always shipping! We embrace tech debt! We refactor later!” The engineer spends his day contributing to exciting, if somewhat unstable, new features.

The next day he is sent to the pearly gates and chooses to live in Hell from now on.

He is sent to Hell, but this time he finds a dimly lit cubicle farm filled with ancient monitors, spaghetti code, and the mournful cries of debugging sessions. He sees the Devil again, still in his t-shirt, but looking exhausted and covered in coffee stains. The engineer asks, “What happened to the ping pong tables and free snacks?”

The Devil replies, “Yesterday we were recruiting. Today, you’re on call!”

Alright, let’s dissect this joke and see what comedic gold we can extract and embellish!

Joke Breakdown:

  • Premise: A politician faces a “try-before-you-buy” eternity, getting a taste of Heaven and Hell before making a permanent decision.
  • Setup: Heaven is stereotypically boring, Hell is surprisingly luxurious.
  • Punchline: The luxury in Hell was a political ploy, a campaign promise that disappears after the vote.
  • Core Conflict/Irony: The bait-and-switch, the hypocrisy of politicians/campaigning, and the vulnerability of someone used to being in control (the politician) being tricked.

Key Elements:

  • Politician Stereotype: Self-serving, easily swayed by luxury, untrustworthy (or at least trusting of the wrong people).
  • Heaven/Hell Dichotomy: The traditional contrasting images of eternal reward vs. punishment.
  • Political Campaign Analogy: Campaign promises vs. reality.
  • Satan: A charming deceiver and manipulator.

Now, let’s enrich the joke with some interesting facts and a touch of extra humor:

Interesting Tidbit: The perception of Hell as a place of fire and brimstone is heavily influenced by Dante Alighieri’s Inferno (14th century). Before Dante, depictions of Hell were more varied. The idea of “Satan in a tuxedo” plays on a more modern, sophisticated image of the Devil that likely owes something to literature and cinema.

New Joke Idea: A Witty Observation

“Politicians promising luxury in Hell? It’s funny because it’s not that far from the experience of some voters who get tricked by campaign promises to live in a wasteland disguised as prosperity. We may not have lava rivers, but the despair can feel just as hot.”

New Joke Idea: An Amusing “Did You Know?”

“Did you know the ‘campaign promise Hell’ is actually based on a common problem in economics called “moral hazard”? It’s when someone takes more risks because someone else bears the cost of those risks. The voters take the politician’s ‘promise’, and the politician’s promises are meaningless once they get into power.”

Another Joke Idea: Playing on the Heaven/Hell Contrast

The politician complains to St. Peter that Hell was a complete scam. St. Peter sighs, “Look, we knew it wasn’t great, but someone had to vote those campaign promises into law. Turns out it’s a real bureaucratic nightmare to repeal infernal legislation, even in Heaven.”

Enriching the Original Joke with a Tagline:

(After Satan says, “Yesterday we were campaigning, today you voted!”) “And remember,” Satan adds, taking another sip of his martini, “every vote counts. Especially in Hell, where the margins are razor-thin.”

Explanation of why these are funny:

  • The “witty observation” finds a connection between the fantastical scenario and real-world disillusionment, making it relatable and insightful.
  • The “did you know?” provides a humorous spin on a serious economic concept, using the joke as a vehicle for lighthearted learning.
  • The variations play on the absurdity of the situation, extending the comedic payoff. The “St. Peter” version gives heaven a bureaucratic and relatable angle.
  • The extended punchline (“every vote counts”) is funny because it twists the positive affirmation into a malicious statement for Hell and keeps the campaigning theme going.

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