When her husband comes home she's on sofa spread eagled only wearing her panties. "Hey old timer," she says pointing at her new panties, "Come and eat some of this!"
The old man says, "Hell no, woman. It done ate a hole in your drawers!"
Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" version of the joke, titled "Grave Robber’s Feast":
Grave Robber’s Feast
A young, ambitious grave robber finally unearths a tomb containing a Pharaoh rumored to be buried with untold riches. After breaking open the sarcophagus, he finds the Pharaoh laid out, adorned with golden jewelry, but oddly, only wearing a bright, shimmering gold thong.
Rubbing his hands with glee, he admires the shiny thong. "Well, ain’t you a fancy dead fella," he says. He then leans in close, and says "Alright, Pharoah, time for me to relieve you of all this treasure!"
The Pharaoh’s mummified head slowly creaks up, his eyes glinting in the dim light. In a raspy voice, the Pharaoh groans, "Hell no, kid. Last guy who ate that gave me a thousand year curse!"
Changes and Reasoning:
- Characters: Replaced the elderly couple with a young grave robber and an ancient Pharaoh.
- Setting: Shifted from a domestic scene to an ancient tomb.
- Item: Swapped the crotchless panties for a shimmering gold thong.
- Core Assumption/Twist: Instead of the comedic misunderstanding of an elderly man’s eyesight, the joke plays on the trope of cursed Egyptian artifacts and the unexpected consequence of eating a dead Pharaoh’s underwear. The "hole" is replaced by a "curse" that resulted from the previous person taking the Pharaoh up on his offer.
The humor is still derived from the shocking image and the unexpected, slightly gross, punchline, but it’s now filtered through a lens of grave robbing and ancient curses.
Okay, let’s analyze this joke.
Joke Dissection:
- Setup: Old woman buys provocative underwear (crotchless panties). This is incongruous with societal expectations of elderly women.
- Premise: She attempts to entice her husband with the underwear. The implied expectation is sexual excitement.
- Punchline: The husband rejects the advance, not out of modesty or inability, but because he thinks the underwear is damaged ("ate a hole"). This unexpected, pragmatic response is the source of humor. The humor stems from the reversal of expectations – the woman is trying to be sexy and he’s treating it like a faulty garment. Also there is the implication that his experience in life is being brought to bear in a comical way.
Key Elements:
- Age: The advanced age of the couple is central to the humor. The juxtaposition of old age and sexuality.
- Underwear (Crotchless Panties): The specific type of underwear is important. It’s inherently suggestive and a visual gag.
- Misinterpretation: The husband’s misinterpretation of the design as a flaw.
- Old-Timey Language: "Hell no, woman" and "done ate" contribute to the character’s age and add to the comedic effect.
Comedic Enrichment:
Let’s use the idea of "misinterpretation" and "age" to create a new joke/observation:
New Joke:
An elderly couple is celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary. The husband, wanting to spice things up, brings home a brand new, state-of-the-art VR headset. He sets it up, loads a "romantic tropical getaway" simulation, and puts the headset on his wife.
After a minute, he asks, "Honey, what do you see? Palm trees? White sand? A handsome cabana boy bringing you drinks?"
She pulls off the headset, looks him dead in the eye, and says, "Harold, I see you spent $400 on something you don’t understand again."
Why it works:
- It keeps the "elderly couple" dynamic.
- It replaces the underwear with another, modern technology that an older person might misunderstand.
- The punchline isn’t about the VR failing, but about the wife’s long-suffering acceptance of her husband’s technological ineptitude, a relatable and humorous observation about long-term relationships.
- It plays on the generational gap and the tendency for older generations to view modern technology with skepticism.
Bonus: Amusing "Did You Know?" relating to Underwear & History
"Did you know that crotchless underwear, also known as ‘open-crotch panties,’ actually has a surprisingly practical (and less scandalous) history? In the Victorian era, they were often worn by women for hygiene reasons. Think about it: layers of petticoats and skirts made bathroom trips complicated. Crotchless underwear made things a little easier. So, Grandma wasn’t always trying to be provocative… sometimes she was just ahead of her time in efficiency!"
This "did you know" is humorous because it takes the suggestive nature of the underwear and flips it, giving a surprisingly mundane and logical historical context. It also makes the original joke funnier, because you realize the husband’s shock might have been rooted in old-fashioned ideas rather than assuming anything about his wife’s sexuality!