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Author: Joke Poo

What do you call a German Bread tag?

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

A Gluten Tag! Made up by my 11 year old son. This may be my new favorite joke. Joke Poo: What do you call a French toilet clog? A Poop-Pouri! Alright, let’s…

A girl took my bedside table after I slept with her.

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

It was my one night stand. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" of the one-night stand bedside table joke: Title: Joke Poo – The Exorcist’s Removal Service A priest took…

Old Couple Goes To The Doctor

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

After a full checkup, the doctor says, “Everything looks good. How have you two been sleeping?” The old man replies, “Oh, I’ve been sleeping like a baby, Doc. But last night, I…

Three cowboys, one campfire, and a whole lot of testosterone…

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

Three tough cowboys were sitting around the campfire one night, bragging about how fearless and rugged they are. The first one says: "Just yesterday, I was walking along Dead Man’s Trail when…

What would you do if you had one day to live?

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

Old Man 1. “I’d have sex with anything that moved. What would you do?” Old Man 2. “Stand very still” Joke Poo: The Compost Heap Old Tomato 1: “If I only had…

My father always likes to say, “It’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey”.

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

Wonderful man, terrible bus driver. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" version: Joke Poo: The Compost Heap My mother always loved telling me, "Everything returns to the earth." Wonderful woman,…

Two babies are born in the same hospital, at the exact same time

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

Two babies are born in the same hospital, at the exact same time. Room 203, side by side in their little incubators. Nurses say it was adorable—both boys, blinking up at the…

The other day my neighbor gave me permission to come into her yard.

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

Then she got all mad because I did it from my side of the fence. Joke Poo: The Remote Exam The professor gave us permission to use any resources we wanted on…

What do you have if you have one large green ball in your left hand and one large green ball in your right hand?

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

The undivided attention of the Hulk. Joke Poo: What do you have if you have a tiny, shimmering, almost invisible speck of fairy dust in your left hand and a tiny, shimmering,…

One my 11 year old daughter made up – What kind of shoes do dogs wear?

Posted on June 1, 2025 by Joke Poo

Barkenstocks Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo," riffing on your daughter’s clever pun: Joke Poo: What kind of underwear do cats wear? Catty Bloomers! Alright, let’s break down this "Barkenstocks"…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • An exhausted nurse goes back to her station…
  • A man walks into a library and asks for books on paranoia
  • My wife asked if I would pick up 5 gallons of paint at the hardware store
  • Why did the crazy Mexican guy kill the train conductor?
  • A man walks into a bait and tackle shop
  • A politician is having a rally in a small town
  • What do you call a group of preteen girls playing musical instruments?
  • The waiter dropped my steak.
  • Jesus drove a Honda, but didn’t talk about it.
  • Local Idiot 1: “Does it hurt to get a tattoo?”
  • Yoda once said “Do, or do not. There is no try”
  • I put my cat on a vegan diet.
  • A man and his wife were sitting in their living room one evening.
  • A man tells his doctor “Doctor, my girlfriend is pregnant, but we always use protection and the rubber never broke. How can she be pregnant?”
  • My patient asked, “Doctor, will i be alright?”
  • One day the teacher told her class to think of something exiting that happened recently.
  • In a small town there was a couple, known for being unafraid to express their love in a simple action.
  • These tropical birds stole my beer…
  • The Sentence
  • Good news/bad news
  • Bad luck Dave
  • I’m a stay at home dad and I started a daycare.
  • Prayer
  • A new cave has been opened in hell
  • The CIA advertises for an assassin and three applicants, Tom, Dick and Harry, are chosen for a final test
  • What did the pickle say to the cucumber?
  • A young class were enjoying the first day of first grade.
  • At the hospital…
  • A woman is sitting at home, on the patio with her husband, drinking a glass of wine and she says, “I love you.”
  • The perch problem
  • In Russia, two guys are queuing to buy potatoes
  • There’s an old joke about the difference between American and Russian corruption.
  • Doctor’s advice for premature ejaculation didn’t go as planned
  • A man wakes up hungover in an alley with his pants off, and notices two colored rings painted on this dick, one brown, one red
  • Scientists took out the left half of a man’s brain
  • A widower goes to a psychic to contact his late wife. “Honey,” he says. “Are you happy?”
  • New Zealand would be so safe in case of a world war
  • A guy walks into a pharmacy and asks, “Do you have any antiseptics here?”
  • I spent a whole year making a belt out of clocks for a fat guy.
  • Why did the chicken cross the road?
  • Knock knock
  • Charley Pride was a legendary musician
  • Women are confusing. On my wife’s birthday, I wish her a Happy Birthday and she smiles happily at me
  • I’m AM going to put glue on my hands and then handle firearms. Nobody can tell me otherwise.
  • Why did Shakespeare only use quills
  • What did one tectonic plate say to the other when they bumped into each other?
  • Do the laundry
  • A couple invited their family over for Thanksgiving night to spend the holiday and meal together.
  • Three men are in an airplane. One is the pilot, the other two are a hippie and the someone self described as the world’s smartest man
  • Hi. What’s your name?

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