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Author: Joke Poo

Before I married her, I took my wife on 8 dates and on the 9th we went to the cinema.

Posted on June 18, 2025 by Joke Poo

Our dates were dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner, BATMAN Joke Poo: Before the Gig Before I started managing him, I took the aspiring comedian on 8 open mics, and…

Three logicians enter a bar. The bartender asks them “Do y’all want something to drink?”

Posted on June 18, 2025 by Joke Poo

The first logician says "I'm not sure" The second logician says "I'm not sure" The third logician says "Yes." Joke Poo: Three Plumbers Enter a Sewage Treatment Plant Three plumbers enter a…

“Mom! Mommy! There’s a monster underneath my blanket!”

Posted on June 18, 2025 by Joke Poo

“Well, you’re the one who picked her up at a bar last night”. Okay, I’m ready to create a "Joke Poo" version of that joke. Original Joke: Mom! Mommy! There’s a monster…

Just got employed as a crane operator

Posted on June 18, 2025 by Joke Poo

It took a while, but I managed to work my way up Okay, here’s the original joke and my attempt at a "Joke Poo" version: Original Joke: Just got employed as a…

I’ve told my birds to attack people in south-east London.

Posted on June 18, 2025 by Joke Poo

Peckham Okay, here’s a Joke Poo version of the bird attack joke, titled "Joke Poo," designed to maintain a similar structure but with a different target and comedic element: Joke Poo I’ve…

The majority of the caloric intake in Blovaria is chicken.

Posted on June 18, 2025 by Joke Poo

It’s a staple of the Blovarian diet and deeply tied to the national culinary heritage. Tradition dictates that roosters cannot be eaten, only females. Most chicken dishes use a local searing technique…

What a nasty feeling…

Posted on June 18, 2025 by Joke Poo

…waking up from a nap and realizing you're still at work. Okay, here’s my "Joke Poo" version of that joke: Joke Poo: What a Cruddy Feeling… …going to the bathroom at a…

What do you call a group of people smoking weed?

Posted on June 18, 2025 by Joke Poo

A Joint Coalition Joke Poo: What do you call a group of plumbers working on a particularly nasty blockage? A Clogged Congress. Alright, let’s analyze this joke: Original Joke: Setup: What do…

Woke up into greatest blowjob in my entire life.

Posted on June 18, 2025 by Joke Poo

Next time I'll try to sleep with my mouth shut. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" version, titled "Surprise Delivery": Joke Poo: Surprise Delivery Woke up to the greatest pizza…

A group of guys and a girl were watching a baseball game.

Posted on June 18, 2025 by Joke Poo

The guys were impressed by her knowledge of the rules and eventually asked: “How come you know so much about baseball?” “Well,” she explained, “I used to be a man until I…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • An accountant, a lawyer, and a preacher were out hunting
  • If you’re American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you’re in the bathroom? European.
  • Eighty-year-old Bessie storms into the rec room at the retirement home, fist raised high.
  • Guy walks into a nice Italian restaurant after the lunch rush with his emotional support alligator
  • At the World Cup final, a man notices an empty seat next to him. He asks, “Who would miss the World Cup final?”
  • A guy tells his buddy, “My wife ran off with my best friend Mike yesterday.”
  • Still my favorite joke I ever made up. :)
  • We were enjoying warm drinks at the fall festival when my girlfriend’s dad pulled me aside and sternly asked what my intentions were with his daughter.
  • Did you hear about the Vulcan that got married and had children?
  • The farmer and the milking machine!
  • When two tampons walk down the street why don’t they say anything to each other?
  • A mom is putting her little boy to bed.
  • My favourite math joke
  • Little Johnny is playing in the yard when he gets a wood splinter in his hand…
  • A woman waits anxiously outside the ICU for news about her husband.
  • Three blokes were at the pub discussing what the fastest thing in the world is
  • An American politician once visited the USSR, and was given a tour of a Soviet automobile factory
  • A young Jewish man walks into an antique shop.
  • What do you call a line up at a Vietnamese restaurant?
  • Just had to take my 2 year old cousin’s shitty nappy off
  • We are the Dyslexic Borg.
  • The Girl with the Wooden Eye
  • Raised in a Barn
  • Eucalyptus
  • I was visiting my girlfriend the other night…
  • Cross-eyed horse
  • The woman and her blonde friend decided to take a fishing trip.
  • A wife, pissed off that her husband was late again, wrote a dramatic note: I’ve had enough. I’m leaving you. Don’t try to find me.
  • A man calls the police
  • What is a landlord’s favorite kind of tea?
  • Fun puns.
  • My wife and I were discussing names for our newborn son when she asked if we could name him after her father.
  • What do you call a group of crows that are one short of a flock?
  • Sister Mary sat across the table from the mother superior.
  • Max and Pete are getting a haircut and shave at a barbershop.
  • An elderly Jewish man crashes his car into a tree. The paramedics arrive and use the jaws of life to extract him from the vehicle. They then put him on a stretcher, loosen his clothing to facilitate breathing, and cover him with a blanket.
  • “Push harder”, I shouted at my wife while she was in labor.
  • Two Irishmen were sitting at a pub having a pint, watching the brothel across the street.
  • After landing my new job as a Walmart greeter — a great gig for many retirees — I lasted less than a day.
  • How can you tell it isn’t Halloween yet?
  • I was chilling on the couch before work
  • One Hot Summer Day…
  • Another man goes to another doctor
  • Purple is my favorite color…
  • The punchline is the name of the site you are on.
  • Why do ghosts like to take the elevator?
  • A man goes to the doctor
  • Camel Brand Cigarettes
  • Do you ever wake up, kiss the person sleeping beside you and feel happy that you are alive?
  • A blonde goes ice fishing

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