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Author: Joke Poo

There’s an old joke about the difference between American and Russian corruption.

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

An American legislator hosts a Russian legislator at his very nice, upscale home on a lake. The Russian is impressed and asks him how he affords this on a legislator's salary. The…

Doctor’s advice for premature ejaculation didn’t go as planned

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

guy goes to the doctor and says: “Doc, I’ve got a problem. I finish way too fast during sex. I can't enjoy it at all.” The doctor nods and says, “Okay… take…

A man wakes up hungover in an alley with his pants off, and notices two colored rings painted on this dick, one brown, one red

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

He freaks out and goes to see a doctor to find out what the rings are. The doctor examines them and says "I have good news and bad news. Which do you…

Scientists took out the left half of a man’s brain

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

They asked him to count to 10 he goes “246 810“ so they put the left half back in and remove the right half. They ask him to count to 10 again…

A widower goes to a psychic to contact his late wife. “Honey,” he says. “Are you happy?”

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

“Yes, my husband,” she says. Relieved, the man asks, “Are you happier than when you were with me?” “Yes, my husband,” she replies, “I’m much, much happier.” The husband smiles. “Heaven must…

New Zealand would be so safe in case of a world war

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

It's not even on the map! Okay, here’s the original joke: New Zealand would be so safe in case of a world war because it’s not even on the map! And here’s…

A guy walks into a pharmacy and asks, “Do you have any antiseptics here?”

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

The clerk says, "Absolutely not, we're very respectful of the Jewish community." Joke Poo: A Programmer’s Predicament A programmer walks into a therapist’s office and asks, "Do you have any debugging techniques…

I spent a whole year making a belt out of clocks for a fat guy.

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

It was a huge waist of time. Okay, here’s my attempt: Joke Poo: The Diaper Genie’s Lament I spent a whole month coding a smart sensor that automatically composes haikus based on…

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

It didn't. It got ran over. Joke Poo: Why Did the Landlord Cross the Line? He didn’t. He just raised the rent across the line. Alright, let’s break down this morbid twist…

Knock knock

Posted on June 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

Who's there? Do you want two CDs. Do I want two CDs who? Do you want two CDs nuts? (Do you want to see Deez Nuts?) Okay, here’s my attempt at a…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • A man goes to the doctor
  • Camel Brand Cigarettes
  • Do you ever wake up, kiss the person sleeping beside you and feel happy that you are alive?
  • A blonde goes ice fishing
  • A 60 Year billionaire marries a hot 25 Years old girl
  • A sheepdog returns to his farmer and says, “All right, I’ve got your 70 sheep back in the east pen.”
  • The Robot Interview
  • A man goes to a doctor
  • I shot someone with a starting gun the other day.
  • A new Navy recruit starts his first day on a submarine.
  • A married man spots a gorgeous woman in the supermarket and says, “Excuse me, I’ve lost my wife somewhere in these aisles… would you mind chatting with me for a bit?”
  • A young man walks into a pharmacy and asks for condoms…
  • An old lady goes to the doctor and says ‘doc, I can’t stop farting. They’re silent with no smell, but I’ve let out 20 in the past 5 minutes sitting here’
  • Girlfriend asked if she was fat so I proved my love in the most literal way
  • A blonde is overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet
  • What’s the scariest thing a gun toting, pegging enthusiast, broke ass girlfriend can say to you?
  • Yo mama’s so fat… whenever she went to the circus…
  • What’s the difference between a guy at a gay bar, a Type 2 diabetic, and a job applicant at a construction site?
  • Patient goes to doctor for test results.
  • A farmer was selling apple seeds that were supposed to make you smarter.
  • A man walks into a bar and orders a whiskey. He takes it outside to enjoy on the bench.
  • Two old friends run into each other on the street.
  • The burley gates of heaven
  • Did you hear about the price of chimneys these days?!
  • The Captain’s Red Shirt
  • Little Johnny’s neighbor
  • Horse
  • Your momma’s so fat…
  • I saw a dwarf climbing down a rope from a prison rooftop.
  • A Jewish woman came to her rabi, visibly upset.
  • Teacher asks Billy a math question
  • I find people can be so judgemental these days….
  • The butcher shop
  • September is Alzheimer’s awareness month
  • I saw a bison in the gym doing a workout the other day….
  • A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt.
  • Mexican Mayonnaise
  • I hate charging my electric car.
  • One day I called home and my kid answered. I asked where’s mom?
  • An old man comes to confession and says to the priest:
  • A Knock Knock Joke
  • What’s common between a testicular joke and testicular cancer?
  • A guy walks in a store looking to buy some beer
  • One afternoon, a teenage couple was on a hike in the woods.
  • Wish me luck, everyone! I have to meet with some people working at my bank in a few minutes. If all goes well I’ll pay off every debt I have, and still have enough to retire early.
  • A penguin was driving through a small town when his car broke down…
  • Not all construction tasks are equally enjoyable.
  • In a carpenter’s workshop, one apprentice makes a bet that he can recognize any type of wood just by its smell. They blindfold him and hand him the first board… the apprentice smells it confidently and says: “Oak!”
  • I was admitted into the hospital and as I settled into my bed, I overheard my “roommate” using the speakerphone to order breakfast from the cafeteria
  • My mom went on vacation to Florida

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