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Author: Joke Poo

A yacht salesman was trying to figure out his commission.

Posted on September 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

He wasn't the best at basic math, his smart phone was dead and to make matters worse, he'd lost his calculator. Frustrated with his plight, he asked his secretary. "Mrs Wilkins, if…

The sandbox

Posted on September 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

Ethan and Susan are playing in the sandbox at recess. Ethan comes back from recess and the teacher asks Ethan "Ethan, what did you do in recess today?" "I played in the…

My dad was an astronaut.

Posted on September 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

I looked up to him. Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version: Joke Poo: My Dog’s a Botanist My dog’s a botanist. I really dig him up. Alright, let’s analyze this joke! Joke…

What’s the difference between a flamethrower and a zippo? Ones a flame shooting gun that’s very heavy.

Posted on September 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

The other is a little lighter. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” riffing on the flamethrower/zippo joke: Joke Poo: What’s the Difference What’s the difference between a professional dog groomer…

Chuck was a poor man who lived with his mother in a shabby old house

Posted on September 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

One evening he burst in and said, “Pack your bags, Ma. We don’t have to live here anymore.” Tears filled her eyes. She hugged him and whispered, “I always knew you’d make…

One spelling mistake can ruin your marriage.

Posted on September 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

I accidentally texted my wife "I'm having a great time. I wish you were her." Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” based on the original, titled “Accidental Autocorrect”: Joke Poo: Accidental Autocorrect One…

I met an older woman at a bar last night.

Posted on September 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

She looked pretty good for a 60-year-oid. In fact, she wasn't too bad at all, and I found myself thinking she probably had a really hot daughter. We drank a couple of…

Two guys are playing a round of golf behind two women,

Posted on September 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

the women are playing really slow, so they decided to ask if they can play through. The first guy approaches the women, gets halfway then turns around and hurries back to his…

A woman’s dog came home one day in heat…

Posted on September 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

She was concerned about keeping it and her other dog separated, but she had a large house and believed that she could keep them apart. However, as she was drifting off to…

The Bible says to love thy neighbor.

Posted on September 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

And Kama Sutra shows how. Okay, here’s my attempt: Joke Poo: The Constitution The Constitution says everyone is created equal. And corporate lawyers show how some are more equal than others. Alright,…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • How can you tell it isn’t Halloween yet?
  • I was chilling on the couch before work
  • One Hot Summer Day…
  • Another man goes to another doctor
  • Purple is my favorite color…
  • The punchline is the name of the site you are on.
  • Why do ghosts like to take the elevator?
  • A man goes to the doctor
  • Camel Brand Cigarettes
  • Do you ever wake up, kiss the person sleeping beside you and feel happy that you are alive?
  • A blonde goes ice fishing
  • A 60 Year billionaire marries a hot 25 Years old girl
  • A sheepdog returns to his farmer and says, “All right, I’ve got your 70 sheep back in the east pen.”
  • The Robot Interview
  • A man goes to a doctor
  • I shot someone with a starting gun the other day.
  • A new Navy recruit starts his first day on a submarine.
  • A married man spots a gorgeous woman in the supermarket and says, “Excuse me, I’ve lost my wife somewhere in these aisles… would you mind chatting with me for a bit?”
  • A young man walks into a pharmacy and asks for condoms…
  • An old lady goes to the doctor and says ‘doc, I can’t stop farting. They’re silent with no smell, but I’ve let out 20 in the past 5 minutes sitting here’
  • Girlfriend asked if she was fat so I proved my love in the most literal way
  • A blonde is overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet
  • What’s the scariest thing a gun toting, pegging enthusiast, broke ass girlfriend can say to you?
  • Yo mama’s so fat… whenever she went to the circus…
  • What’s the difference between a guy at a gay bar, a Type 2 diabetic, and a job applicant at a construction site?
  • Patient goes to doctor for test results.
  • A farmer was selling apple seeds that were supposed to make you smarter.
  • A man walks into a bar and orders a whiskey. He takes it outside to enjoy on the bench.
  • Two old friends run into each other on the street.
  • The burley gates of heaven
  • Did you hear about the price of chimneys these days?!
  • The Captain’s Red Shirt
  • Little Johnny’s neighbor
  • Horse
  • Your momma’s so fat…
  • I saw a dwarf climbing down a rope from a prison rooftop.
  • A Jewish woman came to her rabi, visibly upset.
  • Teacher asks Billy a math question
  • I find people can be so judgemental these days….
  • The butcher shop
  • September is Alzheimer’s awareness month
  • I saw a bison in the gym doing a workout the other day….
  • A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt.
  • Mexican Mayonnaise
  • I hate charging my electric car.
  • One day I called home and my kid answered. I asked where’s mom?
  • An old man comes to confession and says to the priest:
  • A Knock Knock Joke
  • What’s common between a testicular joke and testicular cancer?
  • A guy walks in a store looking to buy some beer

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