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Author: Joke Poo

What do you call it when a police officer goes to the bathroom?

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

A crackdown Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on the police officer bathroom joke: Joke Poo: What do you call it when a chef seasons the toilet? A saltine…

Why was Shrek never satisfied in bed?

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

Because Princess Fiona was just a meaty ogre lover Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on your Shrek joke, aiming for a similar structure and surprise: Joke Poo: Why…

A grizzly-looking man—well-built, with guns hanging from his waist—walks into a tavern.

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

He heads straight to the bartender, orders three shots, and downs them one after the other. He scans the room, and the people shift uncomfortably. The tension is thick. Then, without a…

I like telling dad jokes.

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

But, then again, I am a groan man. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo," riffing on your dad joke: Title: Joke Poo I enjoy composing haikus about composting. But, let’s…

I don’t let my kids watch orchestra performances.

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

It has too much sax & violins. Okay, here’s my "Joke Poo" version: Joke Poo: Coffee Shop Confession I don’t let my dates order iced coffee from this place. It’s always got…

Why do ghosts like to take the elevator?

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

It lifts their spirits. Joke Poo: Title: Why Did the Septic Tank Specialist Retire Early? Joke: Because he was drained! Alright, let’s break down this spectral elevator gag: Joke Dissection: Setup: "Why…

Two men are sailing around the world, doing a ton of drugs, when a violent squall hits out of nowhere. In the chaos, they accidentally blow a seal in the engine and drift onto a deserted island.

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

They both survive, and the next day set out to explore the island. They see some seagulls, seals, coconuts, and also, rare psychoactive berries! Being who they are, they both eat a…

What do you call a German Bread tag?

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

A Gluten Tag! Made up by my 11 year old son. This may be my new favorite joke. Joke Poo: What do you call a French toilet clog? A Poop-Pouri! Alright, let’s…

A girl took my bedside table after I slept with her.

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

It was my one night stand. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" of the one-night stand bedside table joke: Title: Joke Poo – The Exorcist’s Removal Service A priest took…

Old Couple Goes To The Doctor

Posted on June 2, 2025 by Joke Poo

After a full checkup, the doctor says, “Everything looks good. How have you two been sleeping?” The old man replies, “Oh, I’ve been sleeping like a baby, Doc. But last night, I…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • Good Christians should never use euphemisms for the toilet
  • I went for a swim in France on a blowy day.
  • My masochist girlfriend said, “Choke me!”
  • Ever wondered which service has the toughest troops?
  • A doctor comes into the room, shaking his head at the clipboard in his hands, and tells the patient they’re being moved to the east wing.
  • What do you call a ghosts poop?
  • I just brought a 2nd hand book about pasta.
  • Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
  • What dance did the cheese do at the Halloween party?
  • What happens when you’re late for a bris?
  • I’m getting tired of these trick or treaters this evening….
  • Patient: “Doctor! My stool is never solid!”
  • A truck carrying several rhesus moneys overturned.
  • The teacher said, “Steven why don’t you tell the rest of the class something you’re not very good at that begins with the letter N,”
  • Plumber at work
  • What do hillbillies do for Halloween?
  • Driving through the hills of Arkansas I noticed a large herd of cows grazing on a steep hillside pasture and thought
  • I was gonna tell a joke, but um…
  • Graveyard calling
  • What’s the easiest way to get in touch with your inner self??
  • For Halloween this year, I’m wearing pasties and a G-string
  • The singer in Roxette wouldn’t tell me her tennis score…
  • A detective rings the doorbell of an English mansion.
  • I asked my doctor about my prostate health and they gave me thumbs up
  • A  man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by.
  • Manager to his employee: “This is the 5th day in a row that you’re late to work. What conclusions should I make based on that?”
  • I was told that
  • Why don’t witches like winter?
  • I’m proud to say that I’m an award winning procrastinator.
  • What is the formal scientific term for what the adult film industry calls a “facial?”
  • A rope walked into a bar. . .
  • A popcorn vendor asks the customer whether he would like his popcorn sweet or salty… The customer gazes lovingly at his girlfriend and replies “I want it like her”
  • A fireman was working on the engine outside the station when he noticed a little girl nearby in a red wagon.
  • What do lice say when they feel they’ve overstayed their welcome?
  • Missing his son
  • How I want to die
  • Dirty lil’ Johnny.. (I hope its a new one)
  • The experimental surgery
  • Three men are captured by cannibals.
  • A castaway sees a ship, but watches it sinks, leaving one survivor in the water.
  • A man died and was met at the pearly gates of Heaven by St. Peter himself
  • Emergency Room
  • Why don’t violinists play hide-n-seek?
  • I don’t know if 6 is afraid of 7 anymore
  • Just turned 37…
  • I call my dick “Dirty Jobs”
  • Cop: License and registration. Do you know why I stopped you?
  • I asked the librarian if they had any books on amplifiers.
  • What do you call an excellent French lesbian?
  • Where does Billy Joel perform when he’s in Beijing?

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