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Author: Joke Poo

A girl comes home from school and proudly shows her grandma a dollar.

Posted on October 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

"Where did you get that?" her grandma asks. "The boys at school paid me a dollar to climb the big tree!" she says. "You silly girl," the grandma scolds. "They only did…

DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas, and speaks with an old rancher..

Posted on October 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

…With a serious look, he tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs." The rancher nods, "Okay , but do not go in that field over there",…

From an exhausted grandparent:

Posted on October 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

Anyone trying to keep up with a five-year-old knows that Einstein wildly underestimated the amount of energy in a given mass! Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on the…

If you’re building a log cabin in New Hampshire and you want a stone tile roof, always use an insulator between the lumber and the shingles

Posted on October 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

This is because it is vital to maintain the separation of birch and slate Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” version of the log cabin joke, titled “Compost Conundrum”: Compost…

A man at the company

Posted on October 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

A man had been working at the same company for years, quietly doing his job, never causing trouble. One day, his boss walked by and noticed him staring intensely at a blank…

Mr Smiths last wishes

Posted on October 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

As Mr. Smith was on his death bed, he attempted to formulate a plan that would allow him to take at least some of his considerable wealth with him. He called for…

Fun fact.

Posted on October 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

Koi fish always travel in group of 4. When attacked, koi A B and C scatter. Leaving only the D koi. Joke Poo: The Stool Pigeon Fun Fact: Cockroaches are surprisingly loyal…

I went to a bakery and said “I’d like to buy a muffin with chocolate chips.”

Posted on October 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

The baker said, “Sorry, we only take cash.” Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on your muffin joke: Joke Poo: The Compost Consultant I hired a composting consultant and…

A little girl runs up to her grandmother, crying. “Grandma, why does everybody says I have a buttface?”

Posted on October 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

Her grandma gives her a hug. "Nonsense, sweetheart. You have such beautiful cheeks and lovely eyes!" Still unconvinced, the girl runs to her mom. "Mommy, is it true? Do I have a…

I got refused membership of my local snake-owners club because of my pet python…

Posted on October 21, 2025 by Joke Poo

It's Mambas only. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on your original: Joke Poo: The Butter Battle I got banned from the artisanal toast convention because of my topping…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • Guy is standing at a pond’s edge with his newly adopted dog.
  • Golfers are so respectful
  • Good reads
  • A woman complained to her friend that she had a sore throat.
  • Jesus, Moses and an old guy are playing golf
  • A woman goes to the doctor looking fantastic: hair and makeup done by a professional, Gucci heels, Versace dress and a Prada purse.
  • Capital Cities
  • Two cowboys.
  • What do you call a termite/mantis hybrid?
  • I left a bottle of tequila in my Ford Focus…
  • Chapter and Verse
  • I just lost a vegan friend due to a recipe typo.
  • A balding white haired man walks into a jewelry store with a beautiful much younger woman by his side
  • A man and his wife die and meet St Peter at the pearly gates
  • A farmer buys a new young rooster when his old rooster can’t “perform” anymore.
  • “Bear with me”
  • What’s the difference between a bull and a band that plays at weddings?
  • “Are you taking any medications?”
  • Training Day At The Gas Station
  • How many fruit flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  • So, a friend told me about a horror movie where if you get a phone call and don’t answer it, you die.
  • A young reporter went to a retirement home
  • A woman calls the cops about her neighbour.
  • My wife walks out of the shower, winks at me and says, “Honey, I shaved myself down there. Do you know what that means?”
  • Due to a recent surge in mining activities, the logistical network has been overwhelmed in my area.
  • Which movie actor also knows how to code?
  • Bridget Jones is to be celebrated with a new 200kg statue in London’s Leicester Square…
  • The legend of Uncle Marvo (the master of lightning wit, backchat and repartee)
  • Just watching Alien vs Predator…
  • Did you hear about the clown that caused a blackout?
  • Ever since my girlfriend got pregnant a lot has changed in my life
  • Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs visit the Vatican for a blessing.
  • Nowadays pennies taste horrible. Back in the day they used to taste almost like toothpaste to me…
  • A radiator is essentially a vital organ to a car, so it’s kinda weird that the town in the movie Cars is called “Radiator Springs”
  • How is Michael Jackson like Caviar?
  • I made a helpful suggestion about my wife’s donation bag
  • As a person with epilepsy what do i call an Ambulance?
  • I got complimented on my parking today
  • NASA is launching a satellite to say sorry to the aliens.
  • A physicist is walking past a building…
  • A mistress is like a grenade.
  • Sorry Alliens
  • The Skinny Lumberjack
  • What’s the difference between a manly lesbian and a really short guy who works in the meat department?
  • I was thinking about having dinner at a family style restaurant by myself.
  • I made a helpful suggestion about my wife’s donation bag
  • A family goes on vacation to the beach in southern Mexico.
  • What’s a popular 60s pop duo with many Muslim?
  • A man adopts a stray dog.
  • An alcoholic read an article on the dangers of drinking alcohol and decided it was finally time to quit…

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