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Author: Joke Poo

(Long) I was in the garage working on my car when my girlfriend walked in with her new puppy.

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

We began making plans for later that day. Unbeknownst to us, her puppy walked over to a small bowl full of gasoline. By the time we realized what was happening, the little…

“Seeds are the best!!” “Oh really? Says who??”

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

“SESAME!” Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” based on the original: Title: Exam Stress Poo “Studying all night is the best!!” “Oh really? Says who??” “PROCRASTINATORS!!” Alright, let’s dive into the comedic seedbed…

Did you hear about the Rainbow Criminal?

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

He was sentenced to prism but it was a light sentence. It will give him time to reflect. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on your rainbow criminal joke,…

Brain cancer is the easiest disease to cure

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

Just remind yourself that it’s all in your head Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” riffing on the brain cancer joke, while trying to keep a similar structure and twist:…

Who is smarter?

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

Put eight horses in a race and 30,000 people will go to see it. But put eight people in a race and not one horse will bother to go along to watch….

Why didn’t the skeleton go trick-or-treating?

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

No body to go with. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on your skeleton joke: Title: Joke Poo Why didn’t the toilet paper go to the picnic? …It got…

America vs England

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

"Where's your pencil, Bud?" the teacher asked an American boy who had just come to school in Britain. "I ain't got one, Sir." "You're in England now, Bud. Not ain't, haven't. I…

What spice makes you happy when you use it?

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

care-away seed Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on your seed: Joke Poo: What material makes the best diapers for a mime? Silents and absorbent material. Alright, let’s break…

Train tracks are like nipples.

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

The third one will shock you Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” version of the train track joke, aiming for a similar structure and surprise: Joke Poo: Internet Routers are…

Tarzan and Jane

Posted on October 29, 2025 by Joke Poo

After Tarzan and Jane have gotten to know each other for a while, they finally decide to become intimate. Tarzan has never been with a woman before, so Jane asks him what…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • A shy Italian girl gets married
  • a stoner, a jedi and emergency room surgeon walk into a bar
  • I bought a Hustler magazine and boy was I disappointed
  • What’s a debt collector’s favourite herb?
  • What’s the most negative month of the year?
  • A Man Is Invited To A Christmas Fancy Dress Party
  • You can’t trust people on Halloween anymore!
  • What did the Catholic priest say to his disciple?
  • The other day an old guy called about an Australian stick.
  • The Queen, the Pope and Nelson Mandela walk into a bar
  • Good Christians should never use euphemisms for the toilet
  • I went for a swim in France on a blowy day.
  • My masochist girlfriend said, “Choke me!”
  • Ever wondered which service has the toughest troops?
  • A doctor comes into the room, shaking his head at the clipboard in his hands, and tells the patient they’re being moved to the east wing.
  • What do you call a ghosts poop?
  • I just brought a 2nd hand book about pasta.
  • Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
  • What dance did the cheese do at the Halloween party?
  • What happens when you’re late for a bris?
  • I’m getting tired of these trick or treaters this evening….
  • Patient: “Doctor! My stool is never solid!”
  • A truck carrying several rhesus moneys overturned.
  • The teacher said, “Steven why don’t you tell the rest of the class something you’re not very good at that begins with the letter N,”
  • Plumber at work
  • What do hillbillies do for Halloween?
  • Driving through the hills of Arkansas I noticed a large herd of cows grazing on a steep hillside pasture and thought
  • I was gonna tell a joke, but um…
  • Graveyard calling
  • What’s the easiest way to get in touch with your inner self??
  • For Halloween this year, I’m wearing pasties and a G-string
  • The singer in Roxette wouldn’t tell me her tennis score…
  • A detective rings the doorbell of an English mansion.
  • I asked my doctor about my prostate health and they gave me thumbs up
  • A  man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by.
  • Manager to his employee: “This is the 5th day in a row that you’re late to work. What conclusions should I make based on that?”
  • I was told that
  • Why don’t witches like winter?
  • I’m proud to say that I’m an award winning procrastinator.
  • What is the formal scientific term for what the adult film industry calls a “facial?”
  • A rope walked into a bar. . .
  • A popcorn vendor asks the customer whether he would like his popcorn sweet or salty… The customer gazes lovingly at his girlfriend and replies “I want it like her”
  • A fireman was working on the engine outside the station when he noticed a little girl nearby in a red wagon.
  • What do lice say when they feel they’ve overstayed their welcome?
  • Missing his son
  • How I want to die
  • Dirty lil’ Johnny.. (I hope its a new one)
  • The experimental surgery
  • Three men are captured by cannibals.
  • A castaway sees a ship, but watches it sinks, leaving one survivor in the water.

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