God asks the first two what they've done. The first says, "I helped the rich put innocents in danger," and is sent to hell. The second says, "I helped the rich evade…
Category: Heaven
Three nuns die and go to heaven.
St. Peter greets them at the pearly gates and says, "Ladies, you have been so devout that God is granting each of you six months to go back to Earth and be…
A man in California bumped into and recognized God at the beach. God says, “promise never to tell anyone I was here and I’ll grant you one miracle.”
Man says, "I want gasoline under $3.00 per gallon." God, "that's beyond me, do you have a different request?" Man, " I want women to find me irresistible." God, "is $3.00 with…
A man died and went to Heaven.
St Peter says to him “Before you meet with God, I should tell you ,we’ve looked over your life, and to be honest you really didn’t do anything particularly good or bad….
The drowning priest!
A priest is drowning in the ocean when a boat comes by. “Father, grab the lifeline, we’ll save you!” “No, my child. God will save me,” the priest replies. A second boat…
A career politician and an Evangelical Minister arrive in Heaven at the same time.
After all the necessary steps are completed, St. Peter takes them to a small room with but a bed and a chair and tells the minister, “this is your eternal home.” The…
A mathematician, a philosopher, and an idiot arrive at the pearly gates
… …St. Peter says to them" Sorry, heaven is quite full, so we can only let one of you in." Suddenly "Poof!" Lucifer appears. Lucifer tells them "You may each ask me…
If the Devil wears Prada, then who, pray tell, is God wearing?
ARMANI. "In my father's house there, Armani rooms." John 14:2 Okay, I’ll play! Original Joke: If the Devil wears Prada, then who, pray tell, is God wearing? ARMANI. “In my father’s house…
What did the cupcake say to the icing?
I'm muffin without you. Joke Poo: Title: What the Toilet Said Joke: What did the toilet say to the plunger? I’m flushed without you. Alright, let’s analyze this sugary sweet joke. Joke…
An atheist dies and wakes up at the pearly gates…
He mutters, "Well, I'll be damned…" The entire host of archangels simultaneously facepalms. As God pulls the lever to open the trap door to send the guy where he's going, he texts…