Dave and Pete were a couple of drinking buddies who worked as aircraft engineers in New York.
One day, the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do.
Dave said, “Man, I wish we had something to drink!”
Pete replied, “Me too. You know, I’ve heard you can drink jet fuel and get a buzz. Wanna try it?”
So, they pour a couple of glasses of high-octane goodness… and get completely smashed.
The next morning, Dave wakes up and feels surprisingly amazing — no hangover, no side effects, nothing!
Then the phone rings. It’s Pete.
Pete: “Hey man, how do you feel this morning?”
Dave: “I feel great! How about you?”
Pete: “Same! That jet fuel is brilliant stuff — no hangover at all! We should do this more often.”
Dave: “Absolutely. Best idea ever.”
Pete: “Yeah… but just one thing…”
Dave: “What’s that?”
Pete: “Have you farted yet?”
Dave: “No, why?”
Pete: “DON’T. I’m in Canada.”
Joke Poo: Astronaut Diarrhea
Barry and Neil were a pair of veteran astronauts, close friends who’d seen the Earth rise together more times than they could count.
One day, their mission was delayed due to a solar flare, leaving them stuck in the orbiting space station with nothing to do but stare at the stars.
Barry sighed, “Man, I wish we had something different to eat!”
Neil replied, “Me too. You know, I’ve heard if you ferment rehydrated space broccoli long enough, it creates a potent brew. Wanna try it?”
So, they carefully fermented a batch of broccoli, drank the murky green liquid…and got completely spaced out.
The next morning, Barry wakes up and feels surprisingly fantastic – no nausea, no headache, nothing!
Then the comms crackle. It’s Neil.
Neil: “Hey man, how are you feeling this morning?”
Barry: “I feel great! How about you?”
Neil: “Same! That space broccoli hooch is amazing stuff – no side effects at all! We should do this more often.”
Barry: “Absolutely. Best idea ever.”
Neil: “Yeah… but just one thing…”
Barry: “What’s that?”
Neil: “Have you, uh, you know… eliminated anything yet?”
Barry: “No, why?”
Neil: “DON’T. We forgot to reconnect the waste recycling system.”
Alright, let’s break down this joke and then see if we can turbocharge it.
Analysis:
- Premise: Two aircraft engineers, bored and lacking alcohol, decide to drink jet fuel.
- Humor Source:
- Absurdity: The sheer outlandishness of drinking jet fuel.
- Expectation Subversion: The twist that they don’t get hangovers.
- Dark Humor/Gallows Humor: The potential (and ultimately realized) consequences of their actions.
- Punchline: The delayed, explosive consequence revealed in the final line, creating a geographically-expansive fart joke.
- Key Elements:
- Jet fuel
- Aircraft engineers
- Lack of hangover
- The delayed, surprising fart
Now, let’s enhance it! Here are a few options:
Option 1: A “Did You Know?” Prequel:
“Did you know that jet fuel is incredibly complex stuff? It’s not just kerosene. It contains various additives to prevent corrosion, inhibit microbial growth (because apparently some organisms find it palatable!), and even prevent static electricity buildup. Which is precisely why Dave and Pete, after a particularly dull, fog-bound shift decided to drink it, thinking it would be a harmless way to get a buzz. They were right! It was in harmless, because Pete’s currently a minor weather event over Northern Quebec.”
(Why it works: It prefaces the joke with some factual detail about jet fuel, making the engineers’ stupidity slightly more understandable (or perhaps just shifting the blame to the complexity of the fuel). It also provides a reason other than just “boredom” for drinking jet fuel. The punchline is changed to a weather event, making it even more absurd.)**
Option 2: Engineer’s Troubleshooting Report (a new joke):
Problem: “Unexpected Geothermal Event.”
Root Cause Analysis: “Two junior Aircraft engineers ingested Aviation Turbine Fuel (Jet A-1) out of boredom and lack of a suitable alternative beverage. The reported lack of hangovers was a deceptive preliminary indicator.”
Resolution: “Recommend strict enforcement of existing ‘No Intoxicants On-Site’ policy. Further, implement ‘Jet Fuel: For Engines, Not Enjoyment’ training module. Advise affected areas to avoid open flames. Pete is to be moved to working on only blimps or hot air balloons.”
(Why it works: It uses the specific, sterile language of engineering reports to highlight the absurdity of the situation. The deadpan delivery inherent in the format amplifies the humor. The last line provides a nice call-back.)**
Option 3: Witty Observation:
“The real tragedy of Dave and Pete’s jet fuel experiment isn’t the environmental impact or the ozone layer. It’s the fact that they inadvertently discovered a hangover cure, but its method of delivery is… well, not exactly socially acceptable. Imagine the marketing challenge: ‘Guaranteed hangover-free! Side effects may include temporary propulsion and the potential to trigger international incidents.'”
(Why it works: It focuses on the accidental discovery angle and adds a layer of cynical commentary on the potential (and highly impractical) commercialization of such a ‘cure’. The marketing angle is also funny.)**
These options all try to amplify the existing humor by adding layers of factual grounding or playing with the language and context surrounding the original joke.