It's my 10th Cakeday, and I just saw an Olle and Lena joke that reminded me of one of my favorites:
Olle was on his deathbed. The house was quiet, and he closed his eyes, but just as he was about to drift into oblivion he smelled the most delicious aroma coming from downstairs.
"That smells like one of Lena's rhubarb pies," Olle thought to himself, and his mouth started watering. Summoning all his strength, he sat up in bed for the first time in days. He hoisted his legs over the side of the bed. With his feet on the floor, he braced his hands along the wall and made his way to the stairs.
Making his way down the stairs for the first time in weeks was no easy feat, but from here the smell was stronger and the promise of delicious pie urged him on. He made his way down and into the kitchen.
Lena wasn't there, but the rhubarb pie was cooling on the kitchen counter. It smelled amazing, and some steam was still rising from it. Olle hobbled to the cupboard and took out a plate and a fork, set them next to the pie, then took a knife from the drawer.
Lena returned just as Olle was about to cut a slice. She slapped the back of his hand, saying "Don't you dare! That's for the funeral!"
Okay, here’s a “Joke Poo” version of the deathbed joke, playing with the element of unexpected value and shifting the central desire:
Title: Garage Sale Gold
Bertram was in his La-Z-Boy, fading fast. The grandkids were being unusually quiet, and he closed his eyes, but just as he was about to drift off he thought he heard the unmistakable sound of someone haggling in the driveway.
“That sounds like they’re doing a garage sale,” Bertram thought to himself, and a tiny spark of avarice flickered within him. Summoning all his strength, he willed himself up in the recliner for the first time in days. He swung his legs over the side of the chair. With his feet on the floor, he pushed off from the armrests and made his way to the sliding glass door.
Making his way across the living room was no easy feat, but from here he could hear the murmur of voices and the distinct ‘ka-ching’ of a cash register, urging him on. He slid open the door and shuffled into the backyard, then around the side of the house.
Doris wasn’t there, but the garage sale was in full swing. People milled around, examining his old tools and forgotten treasures. Bertram hobbled to a card table overflowing with dusty books, grabbed the highest book, and peered at the price tag: “$1.”
Doris returned just as Bertram was about to pull out his wallet. She snatched the book from his hands, saying “Put that back! That’s the first edition of ‘The Hobbit’! We’re selling it online!”
Alright, let’s break down this deathbed joke and bake up something new.
Joke Dissection:
- Core Concept: A dying man, motivated by the irresistible smell of rhubarb pie, defies his physical weakness to reach it. His final act is thwarted by his wife, who wants the pie for his funeral.
- Key Elements:
- Olle: The dying man, driven by a primal craving.
- Lena: The wife, pragmatically planning the funeral feast.
- Rhubarb Pie: The irresistible temptation, the catalyst for Olle’s improbable recovery (and demise).
- Irony: The contrast between Olle’s desperation for one last slice of pie and Lena’s concern for funeral catering. The comedic timing of Lena returning just as Olle is about to cut the pie is essential.
- Humor Style: Dark humor, situational irony, and a touch of character-based humor (Olle as the glutton, Lena as the practical wife).
Rhubarb Facts & Amusements:
- Toxicity: Rhubarb leaves are poisonous due to high levels of oxalic acid. Only the stalks are edible. This adds a layer of dark humor to the idea of a deathbed craving. One bad bite could be the end…
- Medicinal Uses (Historically): Rhubarb root has been used in traditional medicine as a purgative. Imagine Olle thinking he was going to eat some pie, only to get a dose of laxative right before his final breath. That would just be adding insult to injury!
- Culinary Evolution: Rhubarb was initially valued for its medicinal properties. It wasn’t until sugar became more readily available that rhubarb pie, a sweet dessert, really took off.
- Early American Appeal: Rhubarb was one of the earliest fruits to be widely cultivated in the United States because of how easy it was to grow and its tart flavor made a good substitute for fruit in the winter when there wasn’t much other fruit to use.
New Joke/Observation:
Joke:
Olle’s ghost floated above his funeral, watching everyone devour Lena’s rhubarb pie. “Finally,” he groaned, “I get my slice… of the afterlife.” Then he noticed a sign next to the pie: “Warning: Contains high levels of oxalic acid. Not for ghosts.”
Witty Observation:
The Olle and Lena joke is a classic example of how food, especially pie, can be both a reason to live and a reason to… uh, be remembered. Just be sure to use the right part of the rhubarb!
Amusing “Did You Know?”
Did you know that rhubarb leaves are poisonous? So, Lena wasn’t just being thrifty with the funeral pie. Maybe she was playing the long game. Food for thought.
These new jokes and observations retain the dark humor and situational irony of the original while adding a twist related to rhubarb. I’ve tried to play on the tension between life, death, and the irresistible allure of a good dessert. Enjoy!