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Category: Dog

What do you call a person who cuts off their feet?

Posted on June 15, 2025 by Joke Poo

Defeated Joke Poo: What do you call a dog that lost its sense of smell? Defunked! Alright, let’s dissect this joke! Analysis: Setup: "What do you call a person who cuts off…

A woman goes to buy a parrot and notices the prices are $100, $200, and $15. Curious, she asks why the last one is so cheap.

Posted on June 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

The shopkeeper replies, "That one used to live in a brothel." Amused, she decides to buy it for $15. When she brings the parrot home, it immediately says, "Well, I'll be damned,…

A new neighbor moves into the largest house on the street.

Posted on June 14, 2025 by Joke Poo

John, The un-official "Head" of the neighborhood, goes over to great the new guy. "Hello there, friend, I'm John. What's your name?" He asks. "My name's Alex. Pleased to meet you, John."…

[Need help with] a tagline for a hypothetical company

Posted on June 13, 2025 by Joke Poo

Suppose a company (a hypothetical company making for my gf as a joke for anniversary) that provides boyfriend services. It's website provides services like 1 hr snuggle time with 10 kisses free…

A few summers ago I got a job selling dictionaries door-to-door.

Posted on June 12, 2025 by Joke Poo

On my first day I knock on the door of a nice house and a few seconds later a guy answers. He points to a little sign next to his door that…

I delivered a baby today

Posted on June 12, 2025 by Joke Poo

Now what do I do with the liver? Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo," playing off the original’s dark humor and unexpected twist: Joke Poo: Renovating the Bathroom I finally…

What can you do if your partner always smokes after sex?

Posted on June 12, 2025 by Joke Poo

For heaven’s sake, slow down and use more lube. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on the original, with a similar twist-related punchline: Joke Poo: What can you do…

My wife keeps sewing hidden microphones into my clothes.

Posted on June 12, 2025 by Joke Poo

It really bugs me. Joke Poo: My Dog Keeps… My dog keeps burying tiny squeaky toys in my garden. It really bugs me. Alright, let’s dissect this joke! Key Elements: Premise: A…

Karate Dog

Posted on June 11, 2025 by Joke Poo

A guy sent his wife to the pet store to get a guard dog. The pet store guy says I’ve got something better. I’ve got a karate dog. He goes in back…

I named my dog “5 miles” so I can tell everyone I walk 5 miles everyday

Posted on June 11, 2025 by Joke Poo

It was of a sudden shock when my neighbour decides to compete with me and enters his driveway and says to me “I ran over 5 miles today” Okay, here’s a "Joke…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • I used to be named after a famous South African Bishop.
  • So I went to the telescope shop..
  • Claustrophobia is the fear of closed spaces
  • A man leaves the wild animal vet clinic with a small bag.
  • I tried to teach my cat how to file taxes.
  • I have the heart of a lion, And the eye of a tiger
  • “I’d like to see your lunch menu”, I told the waiter
  • I accidentally spilled a bottle of glue all over my vacation itinerary.
  • So after 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife went to see a therapist.
  • The Madam opened the brothel door in New York
  • The teacher asked little Johnny if he knew his numbers.
  • I just found out my wife has a twin sister.
  • Jesus and the old man…
  • What do you call a paper airplane that doesn’t fly?
  • A Wife Asks a Question to Her Husband
  • I bought a pack of biscuits, on the side it said, “Eat me big boy.”
  • What is a wok?
  • Racism exists in the oceanographic community.
  • Why are you right handed?
  • How does Lightning McQueen masturbate?
  • I recently found out they don’t have the real Mona Lisa in the Louvre
  • I saw a woman wearing short shorts that had a NASCAR logo.
  • A redneck had just been served in a Las Vegas cocktail lounge
  • An engineer wakes up in hell and thinks to himself. I’ve been a good person. I shouldn’t be here.
  • Two teenage church-goers get married.
  • As I walked into work this morning my colleague said, “Dave, you look like shit.”
  • A guy picks up a woman at a bar. After a couple of drinks they go to his place…
  • My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic..
  • The boss was confused when one of his most reliable employees didn’t show up for work.
  • A man is doing 20 over the speed limit on the highway when a cop pulls him over.
  • Accent misjudged
  • The speeding biker
  • My boss told me to have a good day…
  • Came up with this one while sitting in traffic: What’s a whiskey drinkers favorite car?
  • What do you call a cow with no legs?
  • An older couple were lying in bed one night.
  • At dinner, little Timmy was asked by his father to lead the prayer.
  • A joke I made up in third grade: How does a skunk protect himself from danger?
  • Captain Kirk. Peter Pan. Lestat De Lioncourt. Miss Marple. Don Draper. The Three Little Pigs. Robin Hood. Daffy Duck. Optimus Prime. Bilbo Baggins. Count Dracula. Han Solo. Jack and Diane. Elmo. Pikachu. Jean Valjean. Snow White.
  • A joke for reddit
  • A husband and wife were celebrating their 50th anniversary.
  • I said to the doctor “That haemorrhoid cream you prescribed for me is causing some unpleasant reactions”.
  • A woman hits a chicken as it’s crossing the road.
  • A 50yo Woman Goes in for Cancer Surgery
  • “Son, I found a condom in your room.”
  • Interviewer: “How much amount of milk does your cow produce?”. Farmer: “Which one, black one or white one?”
  • MENSA has started administering a new type of test that scans your social media posts determine your functional IQ.
  • A woman cheats on her husband
  • Hello, you have reached the Men’s Help Line, my name is Bob. How can I help you?
  • A man rubs a magic lamp, and a genie appears.

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