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Category: Dog

Did you hear about the guy who ejaculated for four hours straight?

Posted on July 8, 2025 by Joke Poo

He should have expected it though. It was a long time coming. Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo,” riffing on your original: Title: Joke Poo Did you hear about the…

A dog goes to a Western Union office to send a telegram

Posted on July 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

The clerk asks the dog what to put in the telegram and the dog says, "bark bark bark woof bark bark woof woof woof." The clerk tells the dog, "you're paying by…

Lie detecting robot

Posted on July 7, 2025 by Joke Poo

A father buys a lie detector robot that slaps people when they lie. He decides to test it out at dinner one night. The father asks his son what he did that…

A dog owner is with his dog in a park

Posted on July 6, 2025 by Joke Poo

He says "Rex, how many ducks are in the pond?" Rex runs to the pond, comes back and barks 4 times. Some guy watching this goes to the pond and sees there's…

The good news about erectile dysfunction is that it can be cured by diet and exercise.

Posted on July 6, 2025 by Joke Poo

The bad news is trying to get your wife to diet and exercise. Joke Poo: The Stool Softener The good news about chronic constipation is that it can be cured by diet…

My wife caught me when I was masturbating.

Posted on July 6, 2025 by Joke Poo

Never doing that on a ladder again. Okay, here’s a joke riffing on the original, titled “Joke Poo”: Joke Poo: My dog caught me while I was practicing my ventriloquism. Never doing…

car accident

Posted on July 5, 2025 by Joke Poo

While driving, I swerved to avoid a dog, lost control, and fell into a ditch. As I crawled out, all dirty and scratched, a beautiful woman stopped her car and asked, “Are…

My wife and I are a 9 to 5 couple.

Posted on July 4, 2025 by Joke Poo

She’s a 9, I’m a 5 Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo,” inspired by your original, titled “Joke Poo”: Joke Poo: My dog and I are a “retrieve” team. He…

What is July 4 to those who have lost their independence?

Posted on July 4, 2025 by Joke Poo

In Depends Day Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version of the “July 4th/Depends Day” joke: Joke Poo: What is Thanksgiving to a family who forgot to thaw the turkey? In-digestion Day. Alright,…

My son was just born, and another dad at the nursery, congratulated me, and said his daughter was born yesterday said maybe they’ll marry each other someday.

Posted on July 3, 2025 by Joke Poo

Sure, only if my son is into marrying someone twice his age…yeah right! Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version of your joke, titled… well, titled “Joke Poo.” Joke Poo My dog just…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • An elderly couple is getting ready for bed
  • A woman was telling her neighbour about the supermarket that had opened recently on the outskirts of town.
  • the pope’s secretary rings him:
  • 3 boys find a $20 bill on the ground..
  • My missus is going to a fancy dress party tonight, she went out yesterday and hired a costume.
  • My girlfriend asked me to roleplay as a cheater, so I said okay.
  • A married couple were shopping in the supermarket
  • At my vasectomy consultation, the doctor said, “Now THIS is a big, beautiful penis!”
  • Why did the philosopher refuse to clean his room?
  • I saw an antelope the other day.
  • I used to be named after a famous South African Bishop.
  • So I went to the telescope shop..
  • Claustrophobia is the fear of closed spaces
  • A man leaves the wild animal vet clinic with a small bag.
  • I tried to teach my cat how to file taxes.
  • I have the heart of a lion, And the eye of a tiger
  • “I’d like to see your lunch menu”, I told the waiter
  • I accidentally spilled a bottle of glue all over my vacation itinerary.
  • So after 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife went to see a therapist.
  • The Madam opened the brothel door in New York
  • The teacher asked little Johnny if he knew his numbers.
  • I just found out my wife has a twin sister.
  • Jesus and the old man…
  • What do you call a paper airplane that doesn’t fly?
  • A Wife Asks a Question to Her Husband
  • I bought a pack of biscuits, on the side it said, “Eat me big boy.”
  • What is a wok?
  • Racism exists in the oceanographic community.
  • Why are you right handed?
  • How does Lightning McQueen masturbate?
  • I recently found out they don’t have the real Mona Lisa in the Louvre
  • I saw a woman wearing short shorts that had a NASCAR logo.
  • A redneck had just been served in a Las Vegas cocktail lounge
  • An engineer wakes up in hell and thinks to himself. I’ve been a good person. I shouldn’t be here.
  • Two teenage church-goers get married.
  • As I walked into work this morning my colleague said, “Dave, you look like shit.”
  • A guy picks up a woman at a bar. After a couple of drinks they go to his place…
  • My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic..
  • The boss was confused when one of his most reliable employees didn’t show up for work.
  • A man is doing 20 over the speed limit on the highway when a cop pulls him over.
  • Accent misjudged
  • The speeding biker
  • My boss told me to have a good day…
  • Came up with this one while sitting in traffic: What’s a whiskey drinkers favorite car?
  • What do you call a cow with no legs?
  • An older couple were lying in bed one night.
  • At dinner, little Timmy was asked by his father to lead the prayer.
  • A joke I made up in third grade: How does a skunk protect himself from danger?
  • Captain Kirk. Peter Pan. Lestat De Lioncourt. Miss Marple. Don Draper. The Three Little Pigs. Robin Hood. Daffy Duck. Optimus Prime. Bilbo Baggins. Count Dracula. Han Solo. Jack and Diane. Elmo. Pikachu. Jean Valjean. Snow White.
  • A joke for reddit

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