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Category: Dog

All the women i ever hooked up with told me i belonged in the Guinness book of world records

Posted on June 27, 2025 by Joke Poo

For causing the most amount of disappointment in the least amount of time Okay, here’s a new joke based on your template, titled "Joke Poo": Joke Poo All the dogs I’ve ever…

Reversing the news

Posted on June 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

After performing a thorough exam of his new young patient, the obstetrician remarked, “Mrs. Parsons, I have some really good news for you, I have confirmed—” “–Pardon me,” she interrupted, “it’s actually…

I recently dropped 8 1/2 pounds

Posted on June 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

I hope my friend’s baby is OK Okay, I’ll play along. Here’s your "Joke Poo" version, riffing on the original: Joke Poo: The Compost Heap I recently added 12 cubic feet of…

A woman finds a gnome hiding in her house during winter

Posted on June 26, 2025 by Joke Poo

She tries to shoo the gnome out with a broom, and it says "I'm not going out there, it's bloody cold!" The woman says "I don't care! Go find a tree or…

Where does the Devil buy his steaks?

Posted on June 25, 2025 by Joke Poo

In the deli of the beast Joke Poo: Where does a dog filmmaker get his close-up shots? In the tail of the beast. Okay, let’s break down this devilishly delicious joke: Original…

Chronic masturbators must hate golf.

Posted on June 25, 2025 by Joke Poo

Their score is better the less strokes they take. Joke Poo: Chronic Nappers Chronic nappers must hate competitive hot dog eating. Their ranking is better the less wieners they take. Alright, let’s…

Hot out

Posted on June 24, 2025 by Joke Poo

It was so hot out today, I saw two fire hydrants fighting over a dog. Okay, here’s a new joke riffing on the "Hot Out" joke, titled "Joke Poo": Joke Poo It…

Do I know anything about rhetorical questions?

Posted on June 23, 2025 by Joke Poo

Well, does a bear shit in the woods? Joke Poo: Title: Do I Know About Dog Grooming? Do I know anything about dog grooming? Well, does a poodle shed glitter? Alright, let’s…

What do you call someone who dies in the most chill way possible?

Posted on June 23, 2025 by Joke Poo

A casualty Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on your joke: Joke Poo: What do you call a dog that’s really good at cleaning up after itself? … A…

I only own 2 types of clothes. I wear my gym clothes when I exercise. For formal occassions

Posted on June 23, 2025 by Joke Poo

I wear my James clothes. Okay, here’s my attempt at a "Joke Poo" based on your joke, titled appropriately: Joke Poo: Dog Poo I only have two kinds of dog bags. I…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • I’m a corn, not a man!
  • A scoutmaster was teaching his scouts about survival.
  • The pet store
  • The pull-apart tart
  • My sister tells people she turned vegan for love
  • How do prostitutes plan their day?
  • What board game will narcissists NEVER play?
  • I just read in the news that Ben Grimm is leaving the Fantastic 4
  • I invented a thought-controlled air freshener.
  • I’m reading a horror in braille, and tbh I’m terrified…
  • Today I seen….
  • A man and a giraffe walk into a bar and they order drinks.
  • I sat next to this South African woman on a plane and we really hit it off. We spent the whole flight chatting in her native Xhosa language.
  • The dry cleaner.
  • I told a joke this morning in a Zoom meeting. No one laughed.
  • There once was a woman with 100 children.
  • I watched 50 Cent play half a round of golf.
  • Not one person wished me a happy birthday yesterday.
  • Two cumulus clouds are up in the sky having a chat.
  • Kids today are so addicted to technology.
  • An elderly couple is getting ready for bed
  • A woman was telling her neighbour about the supermarket that had opened recently on the outskirts of town.
  • the pope’s secretary rings him:
  • 3 boys find a $20 bill on the ground..
  • My missus is going to a fancy dress party tonight, she went out yesterday and hired a costume.
  • My girlfriend asked me to roleplay as a cheater, so I said okay.
  • A married couple were shopping in the supermarket
  • At my vasectomy consultation, the doctor said, “Now THIS is a big, beautiful penis!”
  • Why did the philosopher refuse to clean his room?
  • I saw an antelope the other day.
  • I used to be named after a famous South African Bishop.
  • So I went to the telescope shop..
  • Claustrophobia is the fear of closed spaces
  • A man leaves the wild animal vet clinic with a small bag.
  • I tried to teach my cat how to file taxes.
  • I have the heart of a lion, And the eye of a tiger
  • “I’d like to see your lunch menu”, I told the waiter
  • I accidentally spilled a bottle of glue all over my vacation itinerary.
  • So after 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife went to see a therapist.
  • The Madam opened the brothel door in New York
  • The teacher asked little Johnny if he knew his numbers.
  • I just found out my wife has a twin sister.
  • Jesus and the old man…
  • What do you call a paper airplane that doesn’t fly?
  • A Wife Asks a Question to Her Husband
  • I bought a pack of biscuits, on the side it said, “Eat me big boy.”
  • What is a wok?
  • Racism exists in the oceanographic community.
  • Why are you right handed?
  • How does Lightning McQueen masturbate?

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