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How do you cancel an appointment at the sperm bank?

Posted on July 12, 2025 by Joke Poo

Do you call them and say you can’t come?

No, they are like loan sharks, you miss a deposit and they beat it out of you.

1st submitted joke

Okay, here’s my attempt at a “Joke Poo” based on your sperm bank joke:

Joke Poo: How to Cancel an Appointment at the Psychic’s Parlor?

How do you cancel an appointment at the psychic’s parlor?

Do you call ahead to let them know you won’t be there?

No, if you try to avoid them, they’ll already know and they’ll be calling you from the future to remind you and be charging for the appointment regardless.

Key Changes and Rationale:

  • Original Setting/Concept: Sperm Bank/Fertility Clinic
  • New Setting/Concept: Psychic’s Parlor
  • Original Core Assumption: Missed “deposit” = physical retrieval.
  • New Core Assumption: Missed appointment = psychic awareness and future penalties.

The humor is still derived from taking a seemingly innocuous question about cancellation and giving it a ridiculous, unexpected, and darkly humorous turn related to the specific setting. Instead of the physical threat of “loan sharks,” we have the inescapable, all-knowing nature of psychics, playing on common stereotypes. The twist remains in the punchline.

Alright, let’s dive into this sperm bank humor!

Joke Dissection:

  • Setup: Asks a straightforward question about canceling an appointment at a sperm bank.
  • Punchline Structure: The punchline relies on a comedic misdirection and analogy. It initially suggests the expected, simple response. Then, it pivots sharply to a violent and absurd scenario, comparing the sperm bank to loan sharks who will physically extract the donation.
  • Key Elements:
    • Sperm Bank: A sterile, scientific environment associated with reproduction.
    • Appointment Cancellation: A routine, mundane act.
    • Loan Sharks: Criminals known for violence and intimidation related to debt collection.
    • Euphemism/Double Entendre: The phrase “beat it out of you” works on two levels, referring to the physical violence of loan sharks and a suggestive reference to male masturbation.

Comedic Enrichment & New Humor:

Okay, based on these elements, let’s create a “Did You Know?” style observation that plays off the original joke:

Did you know? Due to the precariousness of sperm donation, some banks in Switzerland have partnered with local watchmakers to offer on-site timing and metered incentives. This is to counteract the potential for appointment cancellations and ensure each donation is both precise and profitable. Though they still don’t beat it out of you, they do penalize lateness with a reduction in the Gruyère and chocolate bonus offered per deposit. In extreme cases, overdue samples can trigger a passive-aggressive yodel from the bank’s management, a sound said to curdle milk and lower sperm motility by up to 15%.

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