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Category: Husband

A couple of guys are at the bar. The first guy says to his buddy, “My wife just admitted to me that she’s been having an affair with Bob the mailman.”

Posted on July 20, 2025 by Joke Poo

"What?" says his buddy. "That fat ugly slob I see every morning outside your house?" "That's right," says the first guy. "Jesus," says his buddy. "Why would Bob the mailman want to…

A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years.

Posted on July 20, 2025 by Joke Poo

They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other, except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her…

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced five husbands.

Posted on July 20, 2025 by Joke Poo

On their wedding night, she told her new husband, “Please be gentle, I’m still a virgin.” “What?” said the puzzled groom. “How can that be if you’ve been married five times?” “Well,…

I said to my wife, “Sit down, I’ve got something to tell you.”

Posted on July 20, 2025 by Joke Poo

"What is it?" she asked. "I took 250 out of your purse last night." "Gosh," she said, "You nearly gave me a heart attack, I thought you was going to tell me…

Dear Tech Support, Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0

Posted on July 20, 2025 by Joke Poo

And noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance — particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable…

One day, the wife comes home with a spectacular diamond ring.

Posted on July 19, 2025 by Joke Poo

One day, the wife comes home with a spectacular diamond ring. "Where did you get that ring?" her husband asks. "Well", she replies, "My boss and I played the lottery and we…

A woman asks her husband at breakfast time!

Posted on July 19, 2025 by Joke Poo

A woman asks her husband at breakfast time, "Would you like some bacon and eggs, a slice of toast, and maybe some grapefruit juice and coffee?" He declines. "Thanks for asking, but…

A man tells his doctor …

Posted on July 18, 2025 by Joke Poo

A man tells his doctor that he’s incapable of doing all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination is over, he says, "Okay, Doctor. In plain…

Two girls are in the farm field stealing carrots…

Posted on July 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

One of them pulls out really long and big one. She should at the other "Look, this one looks like my husbands manhood!" The other girl asks "He has it so big?"…

An old lady goes to the dentist. Sits down, drops panties, and lifts legs…

Posted on July 17, 2025 by Joke Poo

The dentist says, "I'm not a gynecologist!" She says, "I know, I need my Husband's teeth back!" Joke Poo: The Accountant’s Audit An IRS auditor goes to a tech CEO’s mansion for…

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Todays SH1T Jokes

  • The burley gates of heaven
  • Did you hear about the price of chimneys these days?!
  • The Captain’s Red Shirt
  • Little Johnny’s neighbor
  • Horse
  • Your momma’s so fat…
  • I saw a dwarf climbing down a rope from a prison rooftop.
  • A Jewish woman came to her rabi, visibly upset.
  • Teacher asks Billy a math question
  • I find people can be so judgemental these days….
  • The butcher shop
  • September is Alzheimer’s awareness month
  • I saw a bison in the gym doing a workout the other day….
  • A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt.
  • Mexican Mayonnaise
  • I hate charging my electric car.
  • One day I called home and my kid answered. I asked where’s mom?
  • An old man comes to confession and says to the priest:
  • A Knock Knock Joke
  • What’s common between a testicular joke and testicular cancer?
  • A guy walks in a store looking to buy some beer
  • One afternoon, a teenage couple was on a hike in the woods.
  • Wish me luck, everyone! I have to meet with some people working at my bank in a few minutes. If all goes well I’ll pay off every debt I have, and still have enough to retire early.
  • A penguin was driving through a small town when his car broke down…
  • Not all construction tasks are equally enjoyable.
  • In a carpenter’s workshop, one apprentice makes a bet that he can recognize any type of wood just by its smell. They blindfold him and hand him the first board… the apprentice smells it confidently and says: “Oak!”
  • I was admitted into the hospital and as I settled into my bed, I overheard my “roommate” using the speakerphone to order breakfast from the cafeteria
  • My mom went on vacation to Florida
  • School year is like pregnancy.
  • A man visits his lawyer
  • A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer.
  • Election results are like group project grades
  • A librarian is having a discussion with a cobra…
  • Job interview question: Why ask for a high salary with no experience?
  • The other day I needed to pay a visit to a public toilet
  • A man doesn’t come home from work Friday, instead he spends the whole weekend out fishing with his buddies.
  • A hunter walks into a pub and says that he is the greatest hunter, he can recognize any game animal by its fur, and if they show him the wound, he can even tell which weapon killed it in exchange for a drink.
  • Guy : Doctor, my Girlfriend is pregnant but we always use protection and the rubber never broke. How is it possible?
  • (An original joke best read aloud) My friend got a job as one of those sushi girls. Y’know, where guys eat sushi off her naked.
  • What did the ghost of the Redditor say when looking at it’s own corpse?
  • What’s yellow and really hurts if it gets in your eye?
  • What a nice couple, how long have you been married?
  • Three cougars
  • Why did the BYU student come inside?
  • Reminder: terrorist jokes are tasteless and unfunny
  • Would make a joke about fencing
  • Possums are from the south
  • Did you know they just ruled dad jokes to be unconstitutional?
  • Boudreaux goes to the doctor
  • I called off work today when I saw the date

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