Skip to content
Joke Poo
Menu
  • Home
    • The Enduring Power of a Good Joke
  • Categories
    • Totally Feckin random
    • Why Did
    • Long
    • Wife
    • Walks into a bar
    • Dog
    • Bartender
    • Husband
    • Doctor
    • Chicken
  • Privacy Policy
Menu
Joke Poo

I just bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands.

Posted on July 8, 2025 by Joke Poo

Well, OK. The truth is that I took it off some little, fat, unathletic kid.

Okay, here’s my “Joke Poo” version of the joke:

Joke Poo: My Life Coach’s Laptop

I just acquired one of those “Productivity Enhancement” stickers for my laptop.

Well, okay. The truth is I peeled it off my life coach’s broken one after he threw it across the room yelling, “This damn thing increases my stress!”

Alright, let’s dissect this little gem.

Key Elements and Analysis:

  • Setup: The joke begins with a seemingly virtuous statement: “I just bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands.” This primes the audience for a positive or supportive narrative.
  • Subversion: The punchline completely undercuts the initial expectation. The truth reveals the speaker as a bully themselves, directly contradicting the purpose of the wristband.
  • Irony: The core humor lies in the profound irony of using an anti-bullying wristband as a bully.
  • Stereotypes: The description “little, fat, unathletic kid” uses common stereotypes associated with bullying victims, making the contrast with the anti-bullying wristband even more jarring.
  • First-Person Narrative: The first-person perspective adds a layer of dark humor, as the speaker readily admits to their transgression.

Comedic Enrichment Ideas:

Here are a few ways we can build on this joke:

1. A “Did You Know” with a Twist:

“Did you know that anti-bullying campaigns actually saw a spike in wristband theft amongst budding sociopaths in 2023? Studies suggest that the ironic cognitive dissonance somehow… empowered them. Experts remain baffled, but one thing’s for sure: wristband sales have skyrocketed among children ironically named ‘Hope’ and ‘Faith’.”

Explanation: This takes the original irony and pushes it further into absurdity. It uses fake statistics and expert opinions to create a ludicrous explanation for the speaker’s behavior. The final line adds a touch of wordplay.

2. A Witty Observation:

“Wearing an anti-bullying wristband while actively bullying someone is like wearing a ‘Save the Planet’ t-shirt while driving a Hummer made entirely of Styrofoam. It’s not just hypocrisy; it’s a lifestyle choice.”

Explanation: This observation expands the joke’s core theme into a broader commentary on hypocrisy, using a vivid and exaggerated comparison to highlight the absurdity.

3. A Related (Dark) Joke:

“I’m starting an anti-bullying support group… mostly so I can find new targets. Just kidding! (Mostly.) But seriously, attendance is mandatory, and there will be consequences for non-compliance.”

Explanation: This directly plays off the original’s dark humor, escalating the implied bullying to a point of ludicrous over-the-topness. The parenthetical “Mostly” and the thinly veiled threat at the end add to the uncomfortable humor.

4. Alternative Punchline:

“I just bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands… because I’m thinking of getting into the bullying business, and I need to know the competition’s branding.”

Explanation: This alternative punchline shifts the perspective slightly. Instead of being a current bully, the speaker is aspiring to be one and sees the wristband as market research.

These options all aim to amplify or expand upon the comedic elements of the original joke, either through ironic juxtaposition, absurd scenarios, or dark observations. The goal is to create something new that’s still connected to the original’s humor but with a fresh spin.

Todays SH1T Jokes

  • Why do Athenians hate waking up early?
  • What do “Green Eggs and Ham” and “Fifty Shades of Gray” have in common?
  • A husband and wife are discussing their last wishes.
  • Cookies
  • There was once an old man who lived by a forest. As the years went on, his hair thinned until he was completely bald.On his deathbed, he told his children:
  • High school multiple choice exam (just Yes or No answers)
  • 3 Golf Balls
  • An elderly man lay on his deathbed An elderly man lay on his deathbed, surrounded by his wife, three kids, and a nurse. With a deep breath, he began speaking: “Bill, you get the Beverly Hills houses. Mary, the offices in the Center Center are yours.
  • If you can’t find the opposite of “remember”…
  • What do you call a small green Jedi in the alps?
  • Someone in the street market was shouting: “Jokes for sale, jokes for sale”.
  • I woke up in the middle of the night cooking stir fry.
  • How to pronounce Celtic words and names
  • I was at a con the other day and a girl cosplaying as Pomni held the door open for me.
  • What do you call footwear made from bananas?
  • New deodorant
  • Man sends widow email by mistake
  • My wife asked how my doctor’s visit went. I said, “Pretty normal, except he told me I need to start wearing adult diapers.” She asked why.
  • The wife came back from buying her costume for a fancy dress party earlier.
  • Gator Show
  • Last night I dreamt I had one hand on the steering wheel of my car and with the other hand I was flipping pancakes
  • There was a little sapling out in the woods between an Oak and a Maple.
  • A guy who lives in Boston hears there’s huge carp in the pond on the Common.
  • God said to Moses, “come forth, and receive eternal peace”…
  • An accountant, a lawyer, and a preacher were out hunting
  • If you’re American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you’re in the bathroom? European.
  • Eighty-year-old Bessie storms into the rec room at the retirement home, fist raised high.
  • Guy walks into a nice Italian restaurant after the lunch rush with his emotional support alligator
  • At the World Cup final, a man notices an empty seat next to him. He asks, “Who would miss the World Cup final?”
  • A guy tells his buddy, “My wife ran off with my best friend Mike yesterday.”
  • Still my favorite joke I ever made up. :)
  • We were enjoying warm drinks at the fall festival when my girlfriend’s dad pulled me aside and sternly asked what my intentions were with his daughter.
  • Did you hear about the Vulcan that got married and had children?
  • The farmer and the milking machine!
  • When two tampons walk down the street why don’t they say anything to each other?
  • A mom is putting her little boy to bed.
  • My favourite math joke
  • Little Johnny is playing in the yard when he gets a wood splinter in his hand…
  • A woman waits anxiously outside the ICU for news about her husband.
  • Three blokes were at the pub discussing what the fastest thing in the world is
  • An American politician once visited the USSR, and was given a tour of a Soviet automobile factory
  • A young Jewish man walks into an antique shop.
  • What do you call a line up at a Vietnamese restaurant?
  • Just had to take my 2 year old cousin’s shitty nappy off
  • We are the Dyslexic Borg.
  • The Girl with the Wooden Eye
  • Raised in a Barn
  • Eucalyptus
  • I was visiting my girlfriend the other night…
  • Cross-eyed horse

Categories

  • "Walks into a bar"
  • Bartender
  • Blonde
  • Chicken
  • Dirty
  • Doctor
  • Dog
  • Heaven
  • Husband
  • Irishman
  • Knock Knock
  • Knock-Knock Joke
  • Lawyer
  • Lightbulb
  • Long
  • Mother-in-law
  • Politician
  • Priest
  • Religion
  • Totally Feckin random
  • Walks into a bar
  • What's the difference
  • Why Did
  • Wife
©2025 Joke Poo | Design: Newspaperly WordPress Theme